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Divorce In Usa When On Visa

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by jkpriyadarshini, Feb 21, 2020.

  1. jkpriyadarshini

    jkpriyadarshini New IL'ite

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    Hello Ladies,

    Im here on IL after 12 years i think. Long time. Many things changed in my life. Life improved, i started working,kids etc. But just like a fairy tail, good things don't last too long or may be in my case, it just doesn't last that long. Like, the title suggests, is there anyone who has ever been in my situation ? I would like to contact lawyers but I don't want to regret this first step. Yes, google has tonnes of info but I'm mentally exhausted trying to constantly do things that will the marriage alive. To this date, i have not contacted any divorce lawyers but really want to as i cannot take it any more.

    Thank you all!
     
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  2. Rihana

    Rihana Finest Post Winner

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    Hi Priya,

    Welcome back. Posting here is a good first step.

    Sorry to read about what you are going through. In a few short sentences, you have summarized a decade!

    First things first: if you and/or your kids are in any physical danger, if he is still hot-tempered and slaps, hits you, please reach out and contact an Indian women's organization or similar ones in your city. Your physical safety and that of your kids is more important than anybody's H1 visa or work permit.

    If the physical abuse has stopped and you are simply otherwise overwhelmed and can't take it take any more, then try to share a little more. In the past few years there have been many women in IL who have posted about their divorce journeys and happy lives post divorce. We can dig those up as well as new suggestions will pour into this thread.

    I am glad you posted. Sometimes we have to take life one hour, one half day, one full day and a week at a time. More so, when you have young kids. Hang in there.
     
    gknew, KashmirFlower and anika987 like this.
  3. RekhaUK

    RekhaUK New IL'ite

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    Sad to hear this. Yes, you can get divorced in US , provided there are requirements such as how long you have been residing, type of visa , etc. Im in UK , so i cannot comment about US.
     
  4. ProudIndian

    ProudIndian Gold IL'ite

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    Op

    what visa do you have? You can get divorce in us on any visa. But if you are on H4 or EAD you might need to convert to H1 or F1 if you want to continue living in usa. There might be different laws in different states. You can find that information online. There is certain law that enables dependent to live in USA and work in USA if victim is divorcing due to domestic violence. You can live here and work here for 2 years and get green card or find employer to file your independent visa. Be strong. If it’s mutual consent divorce u don’t need any lawyer.
     
    Last edited: Feb 21, 2020
    senorita2019 and KashmirFlower like this.
  5. Halosandwings

    Halosandwings Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi there,

    I am on H1B with a toddler, currently pregnant and contemplating divorce. I got most of my education through other women who has gone through the process. In my state, child custody is 50/50 no matter what, even for newborns and division of property is also 50/50 no matter what. Please talk to other women who has gone through this in your area. They can guide you about minor details and can guide you to a good lawyer. My understanding is that lawyers only help you to get through the process but can not change the law in your favor. What ever your state law is that will prevail, however wronged you were. In my state even the drug addict dads are given 50/50 custody and there is a strong push for it. Try to find out the state law and prepare for it. The first consultation with a lawyer is free of charge. You need to ask them their retainer fee and hourly rate etc.try to talk atleast with a couple of them before you hire someone. If the lawyer is promising you kids, house, car, boat and alimony the lawyer is just making stuff up. Keep your feet firmly on the ground and don’t fall for whatever the lawyer says. Also, if you and husband have properties in India you need to find out how it would be divided. Btw, your visa status does not matter as long as you have established residency in the state you are filing. Like you lived there for 6 months etc... good luck.. stay strong..
     
  6. Halosandwings

    Halosandwings Bronze IL'ite

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    Proud indian is right.. you can not be on dependent visa..
     
  7. MalStrom

    MalStrom Platinum IL'ite

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    If you have not already, please start documenting all incidents of abuse immediately. Then look for a divorce lawyer who is also familiar with immigration issues and schedule a consultation. You need to know what your options are to continue on visa, child custody etc.
    You can contact a women’s helpline and see if they can refer you to pro bono services.
    The U-visa is available to certain victims of crime including domestic violence but the current administration has been steadily weakening this program.
     
  8. KashmirFlower

    KashmirFlower IL Hall of Fame

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    Child custody don’t need to be 50/50 if your husband himself agrees for visits only. Working out with kids activities homework’s disciplines etc keeping kid overall wellbeing having one primary home with mom, is good and father visting and taking them out and occasionally taking his home all can be worked out by convincing your husband. Short tempered husband how can cordially work it out with you if kids are 1 week with you another week with him, you still will be going through same tantrums from your ex after divorce also.
     
  9. senorita2019

    senorita2019 Gold IL'ite

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    Divorce in USA with a child in the picture where one person is dependent is very very stressful.

    You have to get H1 or F1. Till you get GC its stressful and makes you frustrated during each extension. so many Indian divorced parents go through this because if your extension is rejected (its happening more now) then you have to say bye bye to your child and leave the country. Its just terrible. Thats why many people kidnap the child to India and that becomes a nightmare for the parent living in USA on H1 visa as they have to find a lawyer in India and fight for years to see the child.

    If you cannot absolutely work the marriage, then start a F1 or H1 visa application. Do lot of certifications and get very very very strong in your field so career wise you can be strong and get job even if you lose one.

    Divorce process itself is pretty straight forward in USA, both tell what you want (custody, assets etc) and agree to mutual terms or it goes to mediation, trial and done. Lot of people compromise mid-way due to high legal fees.

    Immigration is your biggest villian here, not the divorce process.

    Goodluck
     

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