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Divorce after 8 years - how does that happen

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by psych, Dec 8, 2011.

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  1. Dec 9, 2011 #31
    psych

    psych Gold IL'ite

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    EXACTLY - I am not saying divorce was wrong - it is neccessary sometimes - but his excuses for the divore was immature - I think those excuses were to cover his EMA
     
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    #31
  2. Dec 9, 2011 #32
    psych

    psych Gold IL'ite

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    SSC - I think I know him well enough. He didnt want to look like the bad guy so he blamed his ex for everything. he put all the blame on her conviniently forgetting to mention his "role". but once i learned the truth, i couldnt entertain him any longer. i dont have any sympathy for the other lady since she chose to go with a married man - no sympathies for her

    whether you want to divorce or not - atleast respect the institution and get out before it becomes a mess. Hes been lying for a while to his wife.

    good thing they didnt have kids.
     
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    #32
  3. Dec 9, 2011 #33
    psych

    psych Gold IL'ite

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    Exactly. Unless he understands what went wrong with his current marriage, he wont be able to find happiness in the next one.
     
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    #33
  4. Dec 9, 2011 #34
    psych

    psych Gold IL'ite

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    perhaps not - but blaming his exwife for the failure of marriage is not correct either. perhaps could have said it didnt work out ?
     
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    #34
  5. Dec 9, 2011 #35
    beerbal

    beerbal Silver IL'ite

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    No one knows the truth (except those two; even then I would be surprised if their heads are so clouded in their own perceptions, that they can clearly see what's true and what's their spin!). We all know that divorce cases bring out the most vicious accusations from both sides. So what he/she says about each other should be viewed as hyperbole naturally. Again you and I of being different genders,k backgrounds, life experiences see things differently.

    No wonder they have juries of "peers"; Not juries of clergy or law enforcement or bleeding heart liberals or men only or women only.
     
    beerbal, Dec 9, 2011
    beerbal, Dec 9, 2011
    #35
  6. Dec 9, 2011 #36
    psych

    psych Gold IL'ite

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    hmmm I dont agree with you on that. How does having a different gender, background make a right sound wrong and wrong sound right? The circumstances landing to deciet/cheating a spouse is both the persons fault. BUT you still have a choice of committing the act. Its committing that act, that makes you the weaker among the two. My issue with him is not the divorce, but the fact that he lied to his wife about a lot of things. In my mind, cheating on a spouse is inexcusable - I could never stand that - Marriage is not everything...

    and again juries will judge on what they "feel" is right with the evidence (available) in front of them. The verdict may not be neccessarily right
     
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    #36
  7. Dec 9, 2011 #37
    SriVidya75

    SriVidya75 Platinum IL'ite

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    as much as I agree with the statement....I also want to say when there are EMAs doesnt matter how good of a husband/wife the person is....they know its coming....we humans act worst than animals when it comes to fulfilling the selfish desires and forget the spouse or kids or the repercussions of our own selfishness.

    And when a MAN involves in EMA , not just him even his family blames the wife stating that she didnt know how to satisfy her man or control or take charge of her man / the marriage....but if woman is involved in EMA we just call ehr characterless and ruthless :)...we dont blame the man or the marriage situations at home...

    though I might sound as if i am taking sides..men find the most silliest reasons of all and most selfish reasons of all when it coems to getting what they want either divorce or respect or getting things done at home....may be over time women also will get to that level (with the best practises learnt from men) but still a long way to go for women
     
    SriVidya75, Dec 9, 2011
    SriVidya75, Dec 9, 2011
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    2 people like this.
  8. Dec 9, 2011 #38
    psych

    psych Gold IL'ite

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    Well Said SriVidya
     
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    psych, Dec 9, 2011
    #38
  9. Dec 9, 2011 #39
    MVRENUKA

    MVRENUKA Silver IL'ite

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    yes srividya,

    i think the only proper decision he made, was not to hv kids.. in my earlier eg i quoted a girl who separated.. her daughter is 5 years old.. she is almost in depression .. she is lost in some world.. she has parents, but they are busy with their own problems.. she is left with her grandma to cry.. very sad..
     
    MVRENUKA, Dec 9, 2011
    MVRENUKA, Dec 9, 2011
    #39
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