Different Opinions

I faced it and still facing it.. My husband is just like yours.. In fact ditto. I am like you.. Ditto situation. If u ever find a solution share it with me. I'll also learn . I'm stuck between my beliefs and his.. Neither can convince each other ...

 

Can it be any similar ... Same situation @Giri12

 

I think until unless he personaly feel or understand the necessity of doing all these prayers, its difficult to involve him for everything. We cannot force anyone and no use also if we do so.
Another solution is to make him to think is such a way that, i should listen to my wife as it may hurt her feelings if I don't.

Anyway atleast parents are with you so you are able to do it yourself. Live positively.

 

Hi @Giri12 ,

I can relate to what you and Anusha feel.

Some of the lessons I have learnt are:

It is a futile exercise to try and change spouses.

In a marriage, ideally, even if one doesn't believe in the other's belief, for the sake of peace and happiness at home, some cooperation should be extended voluntarily.

When the thoughts are poles apart, least interference is a blessing.

Believers should also rationalise that ultimately religion and rituals are man-made and they can be tweaked a bit to maintain the most essential peace and happiness at home.

Swallow some disappointments, reduce expectations and do what is minimally required to make yourself happy.

Looking at the bigger picture, in the long run, a happy loving family is bigger than everything.

Sometimes, he has to compromise and sometimes, you have to. When compromise is important either ways, do so voluntarily with a smile and reduce mental chatter and dissatisfaction.

God resides in your mind and heart. A loving, peaceful and secure family is God's home; don't go searching for God elsewhere.

I will share more lessons later, if anyone is interested!

 

@op I can totally relate with what you are saying .. I faced it still facing it .. I am the kind of person like you who brought up in a traditional family .. my husband family is diff bit liberal kind not so into these poojas and rituals .. they dint know how to chant or read a mantra forget about fallowing rituals ..
They belive god for sure but not into poojas as they are lazy ( I feel so since my mil says she never got free time to do those )

It was disappointing initially for me after marriage .. he will not stop me but he won’t join in poojas.

So I thought what is the use if he forcefully does these poojas ..? So stopped asking him if he wants he will join .. none of the vratas tells us both wife and husband should perform together except of satya narayana vrata and any kalyanam .. so I will do all poojas like Lakshmi pooja , Ganesh pooja , vara laxmi pooja , sai pooja for my own happiness .. he comes at the end to take Prasad .. since other spouse has less to no interest he won’t help me during those poojas so obviously I have reduced doing time taking poojas and offering cooked nyvedyam .. now a days just do regular prayer in 5 min offer dried fruits ..

Op don’t force him it’s of no use .. a prayer needs to be done with pure and whole heart doesn’t even need to follow the rules ..

Start baby steps .. let him just light a Diya everyday after bath or offer 1 glass of water to the god .. that’s all needed if he does that every day he will feel the positivity of god ..

Just my two cents ..