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Conditional Marriages- A Repost

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Agatha83, Jan 7, 2020.

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  1. Jan 10, 2020 #31
    Topaz49

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    :cheer:
     
    Topaz49, Jan 10, 2020
    Topaz49, Jan 10, 2020
    #31
  2. Jan 10, 2020 #32
    Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    Most educated professional women still want to marry educated and who earn more or at least equal. It is time to put the things that you look for ahead like ... "where a woman is respected and treated with concern, shown genuine warmth,compassion, where she has the right to choose her friends,pursue her hobbies and where she is not used as a door mat or a sleeping"
     
    Topaz49, Jan 10, 2020
    Topaz49, Jan 10, 2020
    #32
  3. Jan 10, 2020 #33
    Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    Marriage is work in progress.
     
    Topaz49, Jan 10, 2020
    Topaz49, Jan 10, 2020
    #33
  4. Jan 10, 2020 #34
    Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    Few years ago - My nephew was telling me stories of girls going thru arranged marriages to boys who are in US and once they come here, get a job and settle down, they divorce and bring their lover from India/Singapore. Poor guy had no idea. There were several such cases.

    This was 30 years ago, my neighbor's brother went to India from US, liked a girl. Took her out with all her friends. She seemed happy. Next day he wanted to spend time alone with her. She had one request that he talk to her boyfriend and tell him, that he is marrying her and she is really not in agreement for this marriage. Her parents didn't know their beautiful daughter in her 20s had a secret relation with a 40 year old. The guy refused and walked away.
     
    Topaz49, Jan 10, 2020
    Topaz49, Jan 10, 2020
    #34
    Viswamitra likes this.
  5. Jan 10, 2020 #35
    Agatha83

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    Agatha83, Jan 10, 2020
    Agatha83, Jan 10, 2020
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  6. Jan 10, 2020 #36
    Agatha83

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    Dear@Roar,

    I know how things turn up for a girl when she is in a real soup, issues which crop up post marriage which are so intimate, that they cannot be discussed even with her loved ones. Parents undergo a lot of hardships to get a daughter married, and when they come to know that things are not well at the other end, they do not have the mental or physical energy to help their daughter or son. Divorces are not easy, that too when children are there, as it is in western countries, and unless a woman is financially independent, divorce drains off a woman both physically and financially.
    A visit to the family courts would reveal how much emotional conflicts take place, with couples who were so close to each other till then, look the other way. Marriage built on 1000 lies doesn’t last forever, because trust is the foundation of any marriage, and if this foundation is weak, break ups are sure to arise.
    Each of us born in this world are unique and when we decide to come together it involves a lot of understanding and compromises. This is my personal experience.

    Agatha83
     
    Agatha83, Jan 10, 2020
    Agatha83, Jan 10, 2020
    #36
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  7. Jan 10, 2020 #37
    Viswamitra

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    It looks like the society balances itself with both brides and grooms drifting away from doing the right thing in a marital relationship. I remember the Indian courts summoning the Indian American boys from Punjab who married Indian girls while having a living-in relationship with American woman last decade. It became such a big emotional issue in India. Tamil girl filed a law suit against the son of a Vice-Chancellor for dowry harassment.

    I am glad a lot of unnecessary and painful traditions are broken nowadays and as said above, there is a need for sanctity in a relationship to be maintained by both young men and women. Breaking a marriage is okay as long as there are sound reasons to do so. But a marriage can't be consummated keeping something else in mind. It is worse than infidelity.
     
    Viswamitra, Jan 10, 2020
    Viswamitra, Jan 10, 2020
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  8. Jan 10, 2020 #38
    Agatha83

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    Dear @Topaz49,

    From conditional marriages I have come to accept contract marriages, where marriages are made with conditions laid by both parties written an a stamp paper and signed along with witnesses.. If marriages are business like, with ulterior motives, it’s not a marriage at all. It loses all its sanctity as Viswa has mentioned here.

    Agatha83
     
    Agatha83, Jan 10, 2020
    Agatha83, Jan 10, 2020
    #38
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