Colleague Writes An Aggressive Sounding Official Email. How Serious Is This?

Discussion in 'Working Women' started by Nithya001, May 28, 2016.

  1. Nithya001

    Nithya001 Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi I am working in a private company in Bangalore and recently faced a situation where one of my colleagues addressed an email to me which was rather aggressive in tone. What bothered me most was his use of capital letters in email. This guy who is my team member too often tries to cross limits with his language and behavior and for the same reason I do not speak to him more than required. His behaviour towards me can also stem from the fact (I am assuming) that I am at a lower career level than him and also not a very critical resource for the project we are doing. Since I work with him on the same project, I am a little concerned that if I do not respond to his aggressive email he may repeat his behavior in future. My team lead is a female and is aware of this communication and supports me as she understands this guys attitude. However, since he is a critical resource for the project and I am not so critical I know the team leadership will avoid to upset him. What would you advice? Is writing in all caps to a colleague as serious as the internet says. Is it something that I should raise to a manager and request them to make sure does not happen in future. Since I am the only female developer in this team, I know my retaliation can easily be judged as emotional and out of control. Please suggest how should I deal with this.
     
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  2. ashima10

    ashima10 Platinum IL'ite

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    Writing in caps on is rude way of communicating. this is done only when you have done a grave mistake affecting business or you have broken some office rules ( serious enough ones) or may be if you continuously making same silly mistakes.
    basically caps lock on means the person is shouting at you . In my view this is serious only to the point why has he done it. Write an email back CC'ng your manager that this is not acceptable. Even if there was a mistake at your part the tone could have been softer.if there was no mistake from your side this is entirely UNPROFESSIONAL. ( tell him in a soft tone if you fear this might affect your job )
     
    Last edited: May 28, 2016
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  3. generic

    generic Gold IL'ite

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    Forward the mail to your manager and mention your concerns to him / her so that the team member can be dealt with accordingly.
     
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  4. Anvitha

    Anvitha Moderator Staff Member Gold IL'ite

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    me too agree with the above replies.
    I believe it should be brought to your manager's attention officially in a soft tone as how it is bothering you.
    You can go by her advice officially and later this can be put to HR level if it re occurs.

    In any case one should be firm with soft tone and balanced to face the situations and should not take the decisions emotionally. One can take advises but can judge better on their own, I believe.

    You may be having a senior women colleague who may be able to help you, even if she is from other teams.
    she may be having/seen some similar situations and surely would be knowing as how the company reacts in such situations.

    All the best
     
  5. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    Reporting to your manager is fine, and that is important. But are you sure the caps e-mail was for none of your mistake.
    It is possible to highlight some serious mistakes. If there are any, then it might also mean you are dragging your internal mistakes to the high level.
    If you feel you are not at all wronged, but this fellow is showing his rudeness against you... then take it up to your head.
    Just respond to him with the required detail. In addition, question to him for the reason for the caps mail?
    And also cc'ing this chain of emails to your boss/manager will help him know what's happening.
     

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