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Caught between Husband (to be) and MIL

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Iamagoodgirl, Nov 1, 2013.

  1. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    Mine is arrange come love marriage.When we decided to marry me and my husband to be agreed that we are going to court marriage and reception and we will divide all expenses in half.But when our parents meet my in laws straight away refuse it.They said they want traditional marriage and all expenses should be done by our side only.
    Then after some negotiations they agreed to do divide some expenses like food, jewellery.

    I agreed because i dont wanted to spoil relationship with them.I knew they are bit a traditional and it was too much for them to divide everything.Then fast forward 5 months ,marriage is just 10 days away and they suddenly came home and are saying we will split every expense half.I dont know what drama happened at house.How they change suddenly 180 degree suddenly.They are kinda orthodox and they have these fix ideas about how things are suppose to be.So there must be huge drama to change them like that.

    I am happy to see my husband standing up for us but at the same time i am horrified thinking what would have happened at their house to change them like that.She (MIL) might think its me who manipulated situation and her son to do that.

    I dont know know what i am going to face after marriage.She might give me hell thinking I manipulated hers son last minute.:shaking:
     
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  2. persecutedDIL

    persecutedDIL Gold IL'ite

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    Since you have done nothing in between, please be yourself.
    Just be polite and nice and they should be able to see your good behaviour, unless they are too bad.
     
  3. teacher

    teacher Platinum IL'ite

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    Don't over analyze. Just accept it and enjoy your pre-wedding days.
     
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  4. guesshoo

    guesshoo IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi dear,

    Just remember that the days preceding the wedding will be fraught with nerves. Please don't think much about all this. Just focus on pampering yourself. Enjoy your wedding. Once you are married, be calm and collected; polite but don't bend over backwards to please. Cross the bridge when you come to it.

    You do agree with the idea that expenses should be split. So in case it becomes a bone of contention later on, hold your head high and stand your ground proudly. Remember they aren't doing you a favour by splitting expenses in half. They are doing this to make their forward thinking son happy... As long as you hold your head high, no one can touch you.
     
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  5. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    Thanks guesswho.Got some peace of mind back reading your post.
     

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