Can I Get A Good Partner At The Age Of 35-37?

Dear OP,
There are women at 35 with 2 kids getting married with their requirements. You dont sound too ambitious but a good man who treats you well.
First important thing you should do is " work out and beauty care". change your dressing etc too. dont loose hope and keep trying new dresses etc.
GO enroll in lot of matrimony sites and start seeing proposals. since you dont have kids, you can easily find a person with no kids.
however if you want a unmarried person then chances are less.
All the best

 

At the risk of sounding judgemental, a guy who is in his late 30's or early 40's and never married may not be a right choice over a widower in his late 30's with or without kids. You have got a lot to consider if he was never married.

 

Grass is always greener on the other side.Some married woman crave freedom,many unmarried crave for a partner,my friend who is a divorcee feels independent and does not want a partner.Different people's different needs.

Now coming to you,am not going to console.Let's get started with what needs to be done.

1)Join a gym,yoga or zumba class.Not just for weight but it boosts mental health,you feel good and even one pound weight loss feels like an achievement.

2)Trust me on this.Many girls whom you think are good looking,are they really?Why they appear so?Its the overall personality.No one looks part by part of a person.An average weight woman with clear skin,good hair,good dressing will feel good about herself and her confidence will show.She appears smart to other people.So work on your skin,hair and dressing when it comes
To looks.Do mani/pedi etc.Totally achievable.

3)Dress for your comfort and style accordingly.Dont wear something which you feel conscious of.

4)Do you have good friends or colleagues wit whom you can go out to a good place for lunch etc.stat living.

5)Join meet up groups which are available everywhere according to your comfort.check online for events happening in your city and get going.

6)Matrimonial sites do have divorced section where there are people with no issues.You can check that out too.

7)Never be desperate.As cliche as it may seem,self love is he best.After a point,even in a marriage it's more for yourself.Half the couples you see roaming about are not in a "romantic" world.They have their own set of problems too.

8)work on your career,start living.Life will fall in place.

9)Lastly,please don't regret and don't succumb to when others say you have wasted your life.Nope!you are the one undergoing the trauma.you need to be ready which you are now.Start looking now.All the best.

 

As other mentioned ,focus on loosing weight and gaining confidence for sometime and then do the groom search yourself using matrimony sites.Age is just a number,just look for compatibility and comfortness.

 

Hi Pruthvee,

It's time to forget the past and stop regretting for the lost time and move ahead.

Try to do something that would make you feel good about yourself.. be it losing weight, getting a new set of dresses, a hair cut..or try to do some course or training, anything that would advance your career and boost your confidence.

I would suggest, please have an open mind with respect to prospective grooms you meet. You never know, someone good on paper and ideal for someone else may not be for you. A friend i know, who was divorced before and is 38 just got married to a divorced guy with a kid (who lives with his mom and occasionally visits) , they both love to travel and have been enjoying life since then. She wasnt looking for someone, but this just happened when they met at a meet up..

I know it's disheartening to see your peers move on in life, try not to compare your life to others.. i know its easier said than done, but the best way to start is by staying away from facebook.. instead try to find some good friends you can hang out with..
Goodluck!

 

Hi,
I dont think there is so much reason to worry abt. yeah its fine you dont want a husband who already has kids.. fair enough.
but now a days divorces are so common that there will be many males who would have divorced and are without kid. however in that case the problem is that you need to do a thorough background check for that guy.

my SIl was also divorced and married at age of 34-35 with a divorced man. now they are living happily. she as well waited for 10 yrs to completely heal and now she is happy. so its more of destiny i believe.. no need to panic but ensure whom ever you think of marrying , do proper background check.

 

nothing to worry about..30s are the new 20s....go to any indian matrimonial site and you will find a lot of never married men from early 30s to early 40s who earn really really well, are handsome and are looking for equally good partners instead of just settling down for anyone...

most cosmopolitan women & men hardly get married in 20s since last 10 years or so........these days people care about success/ achievements and the age on face rather than the age on paper..so no need to worry about age factor at all..the more successful and educated city born cosmopolitan men don't care about age at all !...... take your time and choose well .

 

Age is just a number. Register yourself on one of the matrimony portals just to get an idea of how many women and men are single at the age of 35 and seeking a partner. You will be surprised. You could try dating websites as well, if you do not want to go the traditional way. Do not lose confidence.

 

OP! OP! OP!

Please relax my dear.
I will be turning 33 in August this year. This month I'm heading for my final divorce petition however, honestly, I have nothing to complain except for the minor everyday stuff. It's been so long but you are still not over your marriage. Please take professional support to move on. True, companionship is essential to healthy living but one can't jump into it just for the sake of it. Please get enrolled for some professional counseling, maybe some weigh loss groups. Start saving even if you start small.

 

Hi Pruthvee..you are young and in the best time of your life. Actually, I say this to everyone, because there is nothing like being in the present and enjoying your life and being comfortable in your own skin. So even if you were 40 or 50 or 60, I would still feel and say the same.

I have been divorced for slightly more than a year now. I am in my 40's, have 2 kids and am loving it. I was in an extremely abusive marriage - physically, verbally and emotionally and finally found the strength to walk away when I was diagnosed with cancer 3 years back. Being divorced is very common these days though some in the Indian community still behave as if being in an abusive marriage is better than being alone.

Anyways, to your point, you can find a partner at any stage in your life. It all depends on your attitude towards life, self love, grooming, vibe you exude to others that make you attractive. In the past 2 years, I have gone from being bald (due to chemo), having a mastectomy, several surgeries (which left scars) to being a healthy, confident, beautiful woman who gets a lot of male attention. I say the word beautiful in all the sense of the word. I am not a typically physically beautiful woman but I love myself and am compassionate, friendly, kind and have an enthu for life that people get attracted to. When I feel ugly, I look at myself in the mirror and remind myself of how beautiful and gorgeous I am. I am God's creation...how can any of us NOT be beautiful?!! I hope you understand what I am trying to say...

Having said that though, the first window of attraction is physical however shallow you might consider that to be. And it works both ways. I have men approach me all the time - both American and Indian and I see a clear difference in their persona. The American men all go to the gym, keep in shape, have extra curricular activities and are active in doing outdoor stuff outside their work. The Indian men are for the most part overweight, have a sense of entitlement and consider having a well paying job as the height of their attraction ability. They have zero idea on how to court a woman or what constitutes chemistry.

You have mentioned that you have neglected yourself in the last few years. How about joining a gym? starting a exercise regimen that will help you not just lose weight but will help you in feeling happy and confident? Eat healthy from now on. Lots of green smoothies and cutting out carbs, sugar and fried food from your diet will make your skin glow. Ask a friend who's dress sense you admire to help you choose clothes that fit you better. My ex would insist that I wear in frumpy shapeless clothes when we were married. . Now that I am independent, I have come into my own and slowly started wearing clothes that flatter me and that are more my inner style.

And if I were you, I would rethink my attitude about men with kids. Someone who has been in a long term relationship and has kids, knows a bit about compromise and living with a partner. You might want to spend more time with your friends kids and get over your fear of other people's children. Kids are kids and they all respond to love just like anyone else. Anyways, they will for the most part be with their mom.

Last but not the least, limit your association with toxic people who bring you down - be it relatives or friends. 35-36 is not that old. It is all in the mind. Yes, your biological clock is ticking but you still have time.

Take care and hope this helps.