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'Branded' Am I?

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by EverHappy, Dec 6, 2011.

  1. EverHappy

    EverHappy Platinum IL'ite

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    [JUSTIFY]

    “Come here, will you?” Nalini shouted..
    Holding her teddy close to her heart, wiping tears of her face onto her red frock, with her legs trembling Seema came out of her bed..
    Nalini now softened and called her close, Seema felt a bit of relief and walked steady. As she approached her mother, and sat on her lap, Nalini very sweetly said, ‘Seema, why are you so careless my child?’ Seema was dumbstruck. She cried, her mother consoled her and told her she can’t leave her homework book in her friend’s house. Seema nodded, and they hugged each other and made up.
    After a while Seema sat by the window with tears rolling down her chubby cheeks. As she watched her friends play in the garden outside, thoughts randomly danced in her mind, with the word ‘careless repeating time and again”, she asked “why does mum always say I’m careless, Am I? Really? Am I really so careless?” Then she heard a voice calling out to her from the garden and she ran for it…

    Time passed by, she grew up to be a young lady, progressed in her career, placed herself in a good job and was happy with life. One day, she her friend asked her to care for her 1 year old, for a couple of days as she had an emergency to attend to. Her heart longed to help her friend, but she told her sorry she can’t. Again, by the window she sat with tears filling her eyes, and introspecting why she said no. She heard voices within her that said,
    1: Tell her yes, and enjoy the company of the baby.
    2: you can’t do this, taking care of a one year old is not your cup of tea.
    1: but your friend needs your help
    2: Oh she can leave her at her mother’s place and that not too difficult an option
    1: Common Seema, she is your friend!
    2: But??
    1: whaat?
    2: I’m so careless!!!

    With time, branding has become so widespread. We use branded products for almost every single thing and it has become the order of the day! But, it doesn’t end there..
    Oh! You will never improve!
    Oh! You are so careless!
    Oh! You are so irresponsible!!
    Oh! You don’t know, keep quiet!

    Do these statements sound very familiar? Do parents/elders really think of the impact these statements have on the young minds? Do they really mean it??
    I don’t know if it has been scientifically proven, but I assume the right to speak about this issue for various reasons. I think the young minds, need to be disciplined no doubt but elders must be careful not to brand them as ‘careless’ or ‘irresponsible’ etc.. It’s like saying only MTR can make idly, no one else can.. Is that true? NO! Everyone can, just that the taste differs.. We need to realise that God made this creation diverse, so that is the way it should be. Why do we want all children to rank first or be the most disciplined? Can’t we train our children without branding them.. I’ll tell you out of personal experience that getting out of this mind-set becomes a full time challenge for the child.

    First of all the very fact that the child has to realise that it is just a ‘brand’ and not the truth is a journey in itself. Then (s)he has to overcome it.

    We can spare the child of such unnecessary name tags and brand names if we leave the branding work for the marketing pros.
    Sorry if this had a tone of advice, but I wanted to drive home the point.
    Thanks for taking time to read, and ya, please note that the names used are v and if it relates to you please reverse the name and read :)
    [/JUSTIFY]
     
    6 people like this.
  2. Arunarc

    Arunarc Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Everhappy

    Very very familar I always get to hear, you cannot understand as you are far off, you don't know what problems are.....hmmmmm
    yes instead of just using one word everytime it is best for the parents or any elders or even youngesters that you make each other understand.

    I feel I have read this article before...
     
    1 person likes this.
  3. EverHappy

    EverHappy Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi Aruna,

    I get to hear that too.. (very similar statements)
    True, using a single negative word can put you down a lot..
    Read before? I guess you mean the topic..
     
  4. Arunarc

    Arunarc Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    It might not be the same but something similar.
    Don't let yourself down you are a good writer.
     
  5. Uttaraa

    Uttaraa Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear EverHappy (love that id),

    It is sad and distressing to know that children are scarred owing to callous remarks from parents. I wish parents are more wary when chiding the young ones and not cause irreparable damage to their psyche.

    But I loved the way you have narrated such an incident as a parable to drive the point home. Thought-provoking post conveying social message.
     
  6. EverHappy

    EverHappy Platinum IL'ite

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    Thanks Aruna, will be interesting to read the other ones, if you can remember..

    Thanks Uttaraa :),
    Ya, it gets moulded into their head just like any other things do.. Small things that can have a huge impact..
     
  7. sushmavja

    sushmavja Platinum IL'ite

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    everhappy,
    sometimes i say my DD these things,my mom confronts me..she always says it will be in their minds for ever..so never say that..also she says use less negatives when talking to kids.ex:instead of saying no for a chocolate,you can say how it has impact on her teeth,or suggesting other alternatives..i have to a max tried avoiding such words to my DD..
     
  8. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear EverHappy
    I went through your branding list carefully and I was relieved to find that nothing of mine figured in it! I was fortunate to have had parents who were reeling under the branding of their own parents throughout their lives and they had no time to think of a suitable brand or name tag for me. But my school teacher took this responsibility of branding me upon himself and from him I earned the dubious distinction of someone who could never do anything right. He would repeat it at least a dozen times a day. Whenever he noticed a mistake committed by me, he would ask me in a thunderous voice 'Can't you ever do anything right?'

    As you have rightly pointed out, I grew up to be someone who could never do anything right. As I grew more in age and less in stature, I became particularly well known for putting my foot in the mouth at the drop of a hat. People even predicted that I would someday win the 'Foot in Mouth Award' instituted by the British Plain English Campaign given annually. The 2009 award for instance was won by Peter Mandelson for his baffling sentence about the then British Prime Minister Gordon Brown 'Perhaps we need not more people looking round more corners, but the same people looking round more corners more thoroughly to avoid the small things detracting from the big things the prime minister is getting right'!

    One fine morning, I came across a statement that 'we can't learn anything in life if we do everything right.' On hearing this, the tag that I can never do anything right which I have been carrying all my life exploded into a million pieces and my self esteem grew a thousand fold. It only goes to show that we must keep looking for some chance statements that may help us to break free from these childhood tags!

    An excellent parable, as Uttaraa calls it! Thoroughly enjoyed it!
    Sri
     
    6 people like this.
  9. mansimahi

    mansimahi Gold IL'ite

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    Thought provoking post !!

    Most of us must have been at the receiving end or must have been guilty of being overly critical at some point of our life. Parents believe and justify themselves that they are doing so for the good of the child wwithout knowing the damage that repeated criticism can do to a childs self-esteem and mental make-up. The children are likely to grow up as self-conscious individuals who lack initiative and do not have any confidence in their abilities or self-worth.
     
  10. knbg

    knbg Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Everhappy.....
    Thats a beautiful post......your style of narration is fine dear.....
     

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