Boys..huh!!!

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by prathi, May 22, 2006.

  1. prathi

    prathi Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    394
    Likes Received:
    35
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Ek Bus main Ladke aur Ladkiyon ki team bani, Antakshari khelane ke liye

    Girls : Hum tumko hara ke dikhayenge

    Any Guesses for BOYS response

























    ……………




















    Boys: Hum Har gaye , Chalo aab dikhao….. !
     
  2. prathi

    prathi Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    394
    Likes Received:
    35
    Trophy Points:
    33
    The Guys' Rules

    ннннннннннннннннннннннннннн
    At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys'
    side of the story.
    (I must admit, it's pretty good.)
    We always hear "the rules"
    From the female side.
    Now here are the rules from the male side.
    These are our rules!
    Please note.. these are all numbered "1"
    ON PURPOSE!
    1. Men ARE not mind readers.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
    You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
    We need it up, you need it down.
    You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
    or the changing of the tides.
    Let it be.
    <SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","
    1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
    And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want.
    Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That\'s what
    we do.
    Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

    1. If you think you\'re fat, you probably are.
    Don\'t ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
    ",1]);//--></SCRIPT>
    1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
    And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want.
    Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what
    we do.
    Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
    Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
    <SCRIPT><!--D(["mb"," makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one .

    1. You can either ask us to do something
    Or tell us how you want it done.
    Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
    commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We
    have no idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it will Be scratched.
    We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say &quot;nothing,&quot; We will act like
    nothing\'s wrong.
    We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question you don\'t want an answer to, Expect an answer you
    don\'t want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...
    Really.
    ",1]);//--></SCRIPT>makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one .

    1. You can either ask us to do something
    Or tell us how you want it done.
    Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
    commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We
    have no idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it will Be scratched.
    We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
    nothing's wrong.
    We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you
    don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...
    Really.
    <SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","
    1. Don\'t ask us what we\'re thinking about unless you are prepared to
    discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
    or golf.

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

    1. Thank you for reading this.
    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


    But did you know men really don\'t mind that? It\'s like camping.

    Pass this to as many men as you can -
    to give them a laugh.

    Pass this to as many women as you can -
    to give them a bigger laugh






    </div>",0]);//--></SCRIPT>
    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
    discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
    or golf.

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

    1. Thank you for reading this.

    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
     
    Last edited: May 23, 2006
  3. prathi

    prathi Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    394
    Likes Received:
    35
    Trophy Points:
    33
    I don't worry about terrorism. I was[font=Times New
    Roman] [/font]married
    for
    two years.

    --Sam Kinison
    ( i loved this one )
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>--------
    Men have a better time than women; for one thing,
    they marry later; for
    another thing, they die earlier.
    --H. L. Mencken
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------
    When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows
    why.

    When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone
    wonders why.

    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------

    Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.

    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>----------
    When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
    you can be sure of
    one thing:
    either the car is new or the wife.
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------
    I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding<SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","
    her way back to home \nalways. \n
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------- \n
    I asked my wife, &quot;Where do you want to go for our
    anniversary?&quot; She \nsaid,&quot;Somewhere I h! ave never been!&quot; I told her,

    &quot;How about the kitchen?&quot; \n
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>------
    We \nalways hold hands. If I let go, she \nshops.
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>------- \n
    My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.
    That was only for the \nestimate. \n
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>------- \n
    She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then
    the mud fell off. \n*
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------
    She \nran after the garbage truck, yelling, &quot;Am I too
    late for the \ngarbage?&quot;
    Following her \ndown the street I yelled, &quot;No, jump in.&quot; \n
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>--------- \n
    Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses
    to get to \nmarried.
    He says &quot;the \nwedding rings look like minature
    handcuffs.....&quot;
    *
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------
    If \nyour dog is barking at the back door and your
    wife yelling at the frontdoor, \nwho do you let in first? ",1]);//--></SCRIPT>
    her way back to home always.
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>----------
    I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our
    anniversary?" She said,"Somewhere I h! ave never been!" I told her,
    "How about the kitchen?"
    [font=Times New
    Roman]
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>------
    We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>-------
    My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.
    That was only for the estimate.
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>-------
    She got a mudpack and looked great for two days.
    [/font]Then
    the mud fell off.

    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------
    She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too
    late for the garbage?"

    Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."

    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------
    Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses
    to get to married.

    He says "the wedding rings look like minature
    handcuffs....."

    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------
    If your dog is barking at the back door and your
    wife yelling at the frontdoor, who do you let in first?<SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","

    The Dog of course... at least he\'ll shut up after u
    let him \nin! * \n
    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------
    A \nman placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly
    parted mother and started \nback toward his car when his attention was
    diverted to another man kneeling \nat a grave. The man seemed to be
    praying with profound intensity and kept \nrepeating, \'Why did u have \nto
    die? Why did you have to die?&quot; *The first man approached him and said, \n&quot;Sir,
    I don\'t wish to interfere with your \nprivate grief, but this
    demonstration of pain in is
    more than I\'ve ever \nseen before. For whom do you mourn so? Deeply? A
    child? A parent?&quot;The mourner \ntook a moment to collect himself, then
    replied &quot;My wife\'s first husband.&quot;
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>----------
    A \ncouple came upon a wishing well. The husband
    leaned over, made a wish
    and \nthrew in a *coin \n*.
    The wife \ndecided to make a wish, too. But she leaned
    over too much, fell
    into the \nwell, and drowned. The husband was stunned
    for a while but then
    smiled \n&quot; It really works ! \n&quot; </div>\n\n</div>",0]);//--></SCRIPT> </FONT>
    The Dog of course... at least he'll shut up after u
    let him in!

    --Anonymous
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>---------
    A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly
    parted mother and started back toward his car when his attention was
    diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be
    praying with profound intensity and kept repeating,
    'Why did u have to
    die? Why did you have to die?"
    The first man approached him and said, "Sir,
    I
    don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this
    demonstration of pain in is
    more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so? Deeply? A
    child? A parent?"The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then
    replied
    "My wife's first husband."
    ------------------------------<WBR>------------------------------<WBR>----------
    A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband
    leaned over, made a wish
    and threw in a
    coin .
    The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned
    over too much, fell
    into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned
    for a while but then
    smiled
    " It really works ! " <SCRIPT><!--D(["ce"]);//--></SCRIPT>
     
  4. sheeba

    sheeba Junior IL'ite

    Messages:
    87
    Likes Received:
    7
    Trophy Points:
    13
    Gender:
    Female
    Back to the site and had a great laugh!

    Hi Prathi,

    I am back to the site after a long time. First thing I got to read is this message of yours...Had a great laugh!

    But you know, how true it is from the men's point of view.

    The best I like is this one...

    "Ask for what you want.
    Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!"

    When we lived in a joint family, I have tried telling my husband certain things in a way that he picks up clues. But always my M-i-L will be smart to pickup the clues and not my husband. This will put me in big trouble later :oops:

    I also wanted to share my opinion on this one...

    "Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
    commercials".

    I guess these days with so many TV serials catching the attention of ladies, this is more told by women than men! Isn't it true???
     

Share This Page