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Bf Parents Are Visiting

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Cantdecide, Feb 7, 2017.

  1. Cantdecide

    Cantdecide Silver IL'ite

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    Hi all! :) It's your resident "firangi"! I so appreciated everyone's insights and thoughts in my last very drawn out thread and I would love to hear some more suggestions. I am still with my BF and we have been doing much better in communicating and working together as a team rather than against each other. So his parents are visiting in May for three weeks from India and I have talked to him about what he thinks that will be like...but I also wanted to get some more perspectives and suggestions from you ladies about things I can do to help the visit go well!

    He has said his mom likes to cook and would be happy to show me her recipes - is there a polite way to offer my help or to observe? Any don'ts?

    He also said his mom likes to be talked with and feels prone to being ignored. So after my workday, he said things like telling her about my day, and how work was, etc. This doesn't seem to make sense to me, like why would she want to hear about my day? But if this is correct, I'm more than happy to do it. Is this a common thing? Any subjects I should bring up / stay away from? I have a small concern here, I guess his mom and ex disagreed on this and they did not get along. According to BF he said his ex wanted to just go to her room after work and decompress and his mom thought she didn't want to talk to her and was hurt.

    His dad I guess is easy to talk to, likes tea, likes the world news. Again, any topics I should stay away from? Anything in particular I should ask about? Should I expect him to be friendly with me or is there usually more distance between men and women?

    Finally, my Hindi is passable, but they speak English fluently. Is it offensive to speak / try to speak in Hindi and better to speak in English? Or will my efforts to speak in Hindi be ok?
     
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  2. Rihana

    Rihana Finest Post Winner

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    So you guys are living together and his folks are visiting? If the living together is fine with them, would smaller stuff like recipes, talking after work day, english/hindi as medium of communication are non-worries, no?

    One suggestion: return home from work with or after the BF.
     
  3. Cantdecide

    Cantdecide Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Rihana -

    We are not living together yet, but I spend like 90% of the time at his place :) Thank you for the suggestion - since we don't live together I don't foresee being alone with his parents without him very much - although I do think I would learn a lot more that way. :)
     
  4. sbonigala

    sbonigala Finest Post Winner

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    :thumbsup::beer-toast1:
     
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  5. Cantdecide

    Cantdecide Silver IL'ite

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    Hahaha do I want to know what happens if I am left alone? :eek:
     
  6. sbonigala

    sbonigala Finest Post Winner

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    hahahahaha, you may not want to know ;) ;)
     
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  7. peartree

    peartree Platinum IL'ite

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    They are going to meet you for the first time, I assume? Just keep an open mind. Really, before meeting anyone for the first time, that is what is recommended, right?
     
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  8. Cantdecide

    Cantdecide Silver IL'ite

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    Yes, that is right. Hopefully open mind on both sides :)
     
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  9. peartree

    peartree Platinum IL'ite

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    Yep. If they came here asking this question, this would be my exact response to them :)
     
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  10. Rihana

    Rihana Finest Post Winner

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    They bring Moti out of the bag. : )
     
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