Bad Experience With Desi's!!!

Please go ahead and list them emergencies in a new thread - day after tomorrow. That would be fun. We can collect the ways we had forethought what could possibly happen, and how we have plans for our neighbors to step in and help.
Rihana already mentioned leaving the house keys with a grumpy, business-like, neighbor.

This is nice. You have found your kindred spirits. Are they able to call you now and then, just for a chat ? You are indeed, very lucky.

 

Surprised that you did not know that Desis are generally more selfish and self centered than an average person. If you havent come across such people in India then you were fortunate. I do not consider not telling "Alvida" before leaving as selfish. Some people may not know the importance of closure, dont consider me worth it, didnt have their time - their problem. A few aberrations are necessary to balance out things.

Yes, I get along better with Desis, lots of common ground, but there are all kinds of people in every race/community. Generally it is hard to make great friendships once we are into the late twenties. Like the connect we feel in college, even as we start work, it is really hard to find. Perhaps because we dont spend so much time together, we dont face the same adversaries, we dont share the same dreams, we didnt have family that would constantly be in the background. Now a days I have different groups of friends, someone I can reach out if I need help but really dont have much in common now, some i share interests but not sure in time of need they will reach out, only a few that I am constantly in touch and reach out for anything., on-line friends who do provide moral support, some were good while it lasted...

 

I completely agree with you op.Even i find it very difficult to forge a friendship in NJ.either they have their own group or our characteristics are not compatible.one thing what i learnt is,talk well with others and then focus on your life,dont expect them to call you for outings or make a phone call to you.just have hi bye friends,not close ones.

In your case,the neighbour's attitude is totally unacceptable.That tells you how much vengence/jealousy she would have had on her mind.Its better that she had moved away.I also find this jealousy attitude a lot among desi's living here.Iam not generalising,but atleast the people i have encountered.

 

Well, i hav 2 neighbours probably distant relatives of my hus.... One team on our top.floor (say A) and the other right behind us(say B)... A n we have frequent visits but B is like from Aliens land... They dont like any1 visiting them ... Never comes to our house .. as i have said they are distant relatives every other relatives while we see at any malls or may b while calling simply enquires of B.. n i hav 2 say i donno... Their any news... Initially i felt so bad... I thot wat a neighbour i am... I donno even thy r alive or not... But gradually every1 undrstud their naturee.. wen B got pregnant (aftr 10 yrs of marrd life) ever1 from long distance came to visit her.. she said dont come inside its very dirty .. they got stunned and shocked. I was also not allowed to enter her house..
.may b she wasnt well and cudnt keep the house clean..... But at get-togethers she is soooo nice very frndly n all... N wen she hears any1 is goin to visit her she just locks her gate... N me n B exchanges any important msgs thru FB... Many of our relatives makes fun of us... Wat the.... Neighbours talking thru FB.... ..
But still i like her... ... .. Peace

 

This is quite hilarious.. reminds me of the famous quote "We have met the enemy, and he's us".
"K-alvida-NK" was a long drawn out movie, wasn't it ? Perhaps the neighbors who never say good-bye before moving away, didn't mean to be rude. They may have simply thought they were coming back to borrow some sugar later on anyhow... or return the cup ?... and then life's daily harangue happens, and they lost track of time. But they are coming back into our lives again.
Are phoren desis different from desis in desh ? Speaking in inglis all the time could also convey a sense of distance, keeping people at arms-length all the time, no?

 

+1...
Life is not always easy or predictable. In a land where u are a first generation immigrant with no family near by friends are ur support system. Good ones are hard to come by. OP...dont lose faith...there are plenty of decent desi and non -desi folks still left in this world. Be patient and the right family will come along.