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"aunty" Woes Part 2...

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by anika987, Jun 10, 2018.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Lots of threads with aunty woes..hence the title :)

    I am a 38 year old and yeah I am in that aunty age.Why is the aunty word so dreadful?Coz honestly our minds are wired that "aunty" means aged looking and someone not taking care of themselves.Aunty means elderly lady according to the world.let's be honest.

    Anyways..some over do it.

    for eg..I remember a 28 year old (I was 35 at that time) who is taller and well built than me calling me aunty for every sentence.Honestly..I felt like punching her face big time.(I had to vent ha ha).worst was,she introduced me to her 33 year old husband by adding aunty to my name.Quickly,my friend came to my rescue and said that she can address me by my name and it is not like she is way younger bluntly..

    funniest thing was last time in an India trip,my own mom's friend (she is a sweetheart though) played a villi..
    I went to her home and her son who was 29 was newly married.He was huge and 6.1 in height.My mom's friend said "please fall at her (me)feet and seek her blessings."

    my heart burst to 10000 pieces...the newly married couple fell at my feet and I put akshadai on them.He told me "thank you aunty"..

    I looked at my mom and she was trying to control her laughter..


    Anyways..I wish people would start addressing others by their last name..
    Just a fun thread:)
     
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  2. silentlistener

    silentlistener Silver IL'ite

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    Wait a minute before punching on her face.

    I have seen a habit in Maharashtra, Gujarat Rajasthan and UP, probably in some other parts of North India also ; but these four areas I have seen myself the following attitude

    Single girls and single boys , whatever age their's maybe, call married women and married men as aunties and uncles respectively.

    When I first migrated to these areas, this was shocking to me as well. Then I spoke with the people there: they told me that going from single status to married status is basically a promotion in life. It is the status which the single individuals respect by calling aunty or uncle. They definitely do not mean to make you feel bad that they are younger than you and you are elder than them.

    If you are from any of the South Indian states ,definitely this way of calling aunty and uncle will be sounding wierd to you.

    Because in South by calling aunty one always means that you are elder and thy are younger. That is not the case for people in North India. That 28 years old woman who has called you aunty, must have migrated from either of the four states I have fore mentioned.
     
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2018
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  3. GeetaKashyap

    GeetaKashyap Finest Post Winner

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    Aunt or aunty as we Indians say, is indeed a dreaded and plain insulting word depending on who uses it and against whom. Aunty can be anyone older than us by a couple of decades. Generally, we teach kids to call someone older than 30 as aunty or uncle and all under that age group are didis and bhais. This is simply to teach them to respect elders. But once in the workforce or family life, the age gaps begin to blur and it is perfect to address someone by name or surname and when the affection and closeness is more, it may be even okay to prefix it with akka, didi, Anna, bhai, ma, ji etc. provided the other person is okay with it.

    The issue arises when the word aunty is used to push someone into an 'elderly' bracket or a brand. This puts unspoken gaps in communication especially in online communications where everyone is a virtual contact. I think it is better to avoid these divisive forms of address online unless a relationship matures to that special level. Offline of course, in an instant we connect and addressing someone older as aunty or uncle out of 'real' respect should be quite okay. And if someone is uncomfortable with this form of address, one should also be mature enough to honour it.

    On the day of my marriage, my husband introduced me to a bunch of relatives who were all older than me but were my grandchildren through relationship! I used to wear crisp cotton sarees in my twenties and because of that many, including older women, would address me as aunty! This was derogatory and plain stupidity on their part. Now women in salwars or any other Indian costumes get this tag!! Do they mean wearing Indian costumes is regressive or archaic? Many less educated women/men address others, even in their age group, as aunty or uncle. Though this reflects their low awareness, it definitely brands the other person if they don't object and if they object, it is a point of a ridiculous discussion! Mostly women play this stupid game. Their curiosity and detective strategies to find out someone's age and brand them as 'aunty' somehow gives them a cheap thrill!

    A neighbour used to claim that she became a post-graduate by the age of 15! Another lady hid her age by claiming that she graduated after kids were born and thus they weren't aunties while all others around them were! And a few years ago when I met her, she had aged overnight by 15 years & was eligible for Railway senior citizen 's discount! I still don't understand why someone had to hide their age so much...was it have the vicarious pleasure of calling other women in their age group as aunties? I think it's time women, at least the educated, got out of this trap.
     
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2018
  4. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    She is tamilian too:)
     
  5. Needtobestrong

    Needtobestrong Gold IL'ite

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    Hehe..
    Age is only a number..
    Anyways I've come across many of ur threads and I'm sure maintain yourself well, u are a yummy mummy and no way u look like an "auntie"!
     
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  6. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks dear tats sweet of you:)
    It was really funny thinking about it when a newly married couple fell at my feet
     
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  7. silentlistener

    silentlistener Silver IL'ite

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    Really strange that a Tamilian calls you so. Tamilians call their slightly elder women as, "akkaa".

    Then, by chance, is she provoking you ?!:frowning:
     
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  8. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    maybe..
     
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  9. adismom

    adismom Bronze IL'ite

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    When I was in high school, I called a neighbor ‘aunty’. My logic was she was married so automatically fell in that category. She got visibly offended and said ‘call me didi not aunty ‘.
    Today I am in her same position, in my mid thirties and I get startled when someone calls me ‘aunty ‘. Guess life comes full circle
     
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  10. Sangeeta85

    Sangeeta85 Gold IL'ite

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    True it happens ..I had moved to a new place met the lady I saw her in morning and she had grey hair not complete but yes visible so that I called her aunty ,I did not mean to hurt just out of respect and I wondered oh she had way to late kid..guess then we got to know each other very well spoke on daily basis till I moved from there ,same age and she was sweet enough to never ever even bother to ask me y I called her that ..
     
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