Anyone faced such insults? How do u react?

EH.. I have been out like that a few couple of times and the only person who I saw discriminating against me was my DH :biggrin2:

 

Vibha, I am glad you brought this up, because I was thinking the same thing. There is a difference between being all glammed up and fashionably attired (or wearing labels or "nice" clothes), and being well groomed. I live in jeans, and as for shoes (now don't go throwing your Manolos at me, fashionable ones), it's sensible LL Bean skid-proof insulated ones in the winter, and sensible skid-proof waterproof Keens in the summer. But I am always clean and neat. This counts for a lot. Good teeth also goes a long way here (which is why the Americans are always making fun of British teeth, like Austin Powers).

I don't think there's anything wrong with one being presentable in public. I live in a university town, and I occasionally see students who look like they fell out of bed, rolled out of the door, and onto the street (rumpled track pants, mismatched, creased T-shirt, and hair standing on end). If I owned a store, I don't think I'd enjoy their hanging around my carefully constructed displays and ruining the ambiance.

Vibha, thank you. I could probably find about 15 errors in what I wrote if I looked (I don't look anymore, because of the edit window), but "cooked fruit" is not one of them. Maybe cooked fruit is not all that common in Indian cooking (maybe that's why I LOVE Indian food), but it is tragically common in other cuisines. I meant applying heat to fruit - like poached pears, or baked apples. My grandmother's payasam was the best, until I bit into a bloated raisin, plump and mushy-sweet from wallowing in sugar and milk. Baking or cooking fruit intensifies the sweetness and makes it all gooey and sticky (like in an apple compote). *Shudder*

Predictably, my daughter, husband, and all our friends love this sort of thing, so I am constantly making apple cakes and fruit cobblers.

 

ES... fortunately I haven't experienced this so far.

"May I help you", I guess is the regular norm of all the stores, be it even huge stores like Macy's. But its the gesture its conveyed in that matters, I agree.

Next time, how about smiling back at them, and telling them, "Thanks, but I am just looking around" Just say it with a warm smile and walk away and still if they follow you, be the first to say, "I will let you know if I need help. Thanks!" and they will get it.

If they still don't, pleasantly ask them, "is there anything I can help you with?"
I am sure they will not bother you again.

But whatever you do and wherever you are, be confident. It doesn't matter that you are not in your own country, what matters is how you carry yourself and represent your country.

Mostly the staff are well trained, atleast that of the huge stores. Or may be some may have had real bad experience with our race, which ofcourse doesn't give them any rights to discriminate against us. And I know its racism, but let me share you a live example --

A desi was trying to return a "used dust-bin" at wal-mart. The counter lady politely said that she cannot accept. He still kept on arguing, as he had the receipt. She called the manager and manager too denied very politely. He still argued. This went on for a few min. Finally the manager had to be shrewd enough to decline his request.

 

Wall to wall carpets, yes.
But a nice Persian rug?

 

Even in India, when we go to malls , several times I have faced the salesgirl/sales boy approaching us, and asking, 'any help', especially when we keep seeing merchandise after merchandise, for a long time, without purchasing one.

In 'Globus' chain of shop, it is their policy to go to the customer and ask so.

May be that US guy who asked you, 'any help' might not have any feelings of underestimation about you (because you are an Indian). Your own pre-occupation and fears about racism might have made you think so !

Just a genuine possibility !

 

I don't give second chance to anyone (except DH lost count of chances there). If I receive a bad service or treatment, i never deal with that vendor ever again. Comcast lost my business as long as I live. AA, Delta are on that list while I am loyal to AT&T, Alaska, Korean and SW. On the retail side, Target has been my favorite. Also, stores in India where we have to bargain (as opposed to fix price) are not on my list.

If I go to a store in unknown location, if I don't get good feelings about the store or the sales person, i walk out.

Racism is there and will always be there. The only thing we can do is avoid and never give them a second chance. I don't argue with them, i just walk away.

 

I believe this is some of our DESI's fault to be treated like that....:hide:

some examples

----- buying cloths and returning them after vacation.( cameras , camcorders etc ):shock:

-----returning the products only 2 days of returns expiry date ( meaning used to the fullest you can and shamelessly return the products):bowdown
---- using return policy in a veryyy wrong way:boo:
the list goes on and on.....

The behavior is disgusting isn't it??????? Friends......

thats why we are dirty,shameless DESI's in their view.....

 

I have experienced this in India as well!!! And I go well dressed and even then the sales people chase us. It is annoying.

Does this happen to other people (read whites) in the US?

 

Exactly. Even I had the same experience in Globus. Maybe their policy. It is irritating though.

 

I think such things are done mostly by new immigrants in the first year or a few years of their entering US. But as they live here and become affluent they mostly stop it. So I wouldn't just lay blame solely on Desi. Also with more internet shopping and stores have strict policies on returns, returning has gone down.

Besides, stores know that people are going to return and they have prices marked up as such. They expect 10 % of the sales are bound to be returned. In most stores, the returns are absorbed by the vendors and not the stores. The stores just provide the space for the vendors.