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Am I Too Friendly Or People Take Advantage Of Me

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by Vedhavalli, Jun 5, 2019.

  1. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Platinum IL'ite

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    Most of you know I'm on learning curve of art of saying NO.
    Few weeks back one of my desi neighbor moved to different city. Her husband moved to that city already. She was struggling with kids and packing moving... She asked for me to help on the day of shipping. So I spent a few hours and gave food. All's well. She moved.
    Now one of aquitances is moving to another place. We know thru common friends.
    She is moving and called, asking if I can help her since I did for another one.
    I said no, I'm busy. She is bad mouthing to others that I don't want to help her.
    She is different community 3 miles away. She has many people in same apt to help her out. Why she didn't call others?
    First one she was in my apt, I really wanted to help her.

    Why people can't take no for no?
    Why people think they can easily ask anything to me?
     
    Thyagarajan and KashmirFlower like this.
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  2. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Depends on how you said no. If you did it courteously, and still she is complaining, then she is the problem, so don't bother. It is human to feel disappointed when one expects help and the end result is something else. You made your mind up, so train yourself to stop feeling bad after saying no. Let her spread the word. At least people will know that you too say no sometimes.
     
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  3. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    And now there is someone who is helping you by making it known in the community, that you can do it too:
     
  4. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    Just shows her bad character.
    Ignore her.
    Can't please everybody
     
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  5. safetypartha

    safetypartha New IL'ite

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    Just ignore to have your peace of Mind.
    God Bless you.
     
  6. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    :hello:@Vedhavalli
    In life at many times one would encounter occasions to say an emphatic NO to some:
    And even to some you might like to say like a diplomat NO meaning YES and vice versa.
    There are occasions when to the same person you might say NO to whom you previously said YES.
    To Some we feel no would hurt them and so you say yes.
    To some you say yes because of magnetism.
    To some you lend a deaf year even.
    OMG so much between YES & NO!

    NO or YES leads to repentance at a later time or at a later date. You wish, at times you had said bluntly a big NO.
    ANYWAYS regret for a while and move on.
    Regards.
    God is between YES & NO.
     
    Last edited: Jun 6, 2019

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