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Almost a year later

Discussion in 'Life Without Spouse' started by littlelost, Feb 16, 2012.

  1. PriyaDominic

    PriyaDominic Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Friend,

    You know what - all your dreams will come true.. you will get a loving husband and lot of kids... dont worry, u took the right stepa nd in few months time everything else will fall in place. Reading your stoty I am reminded of some one who got separated after 5 years of marriage. now Her case was very similar to yours every word you wrote here was the same for her too. She was also undergoing severe emotional feelings... and had dcided to remarry only after she is really convinced of the guy. Her parents came up with an alliance and she talked to taht person for some time and decided to marry. And the happy news is theya re happily married over 2 years now... kid is also coming soon I think..
    you are only 32 now!! she was around 35 I think.
    try to do lil dieting if you really want to... be alret in heart.. pray very well and you will be blessed
    Regards
    Priya
     
  2. cj1980

    cj1980 Gold IL'ite

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    I know how hard it is to get off our behinds and workout on a regular basis! You can try working out with a group of individuals. When you have a shared common goal it can help you stay motivated and on track. I find Pilates to be a great low-intensity workout that tones the body without having you jump around like a rabbit. It's basically mat-work and focuses on the core...I found many local Pilates classes where you live (was looking out for one myself but couldn't sign up coz I found out am preggers)...would be a great way to make new friends too. I would also recommend you get on a sound diet plan...I have read many good things about Cynthia Sass's Cinch Diet plan...consult your doc before embarking on one though. The key to losing weight and keeping it off is to combine a healthy diet pattern with regular exercise. Am sure you will find the right combination for your needs! Good luck.
     
  3. SSC

    SSC Platinum IL'ite

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    Options:

    1.Refrain from using a treadmill if you have knee injury. Treadmill is hard on the ligaments of the knee, because you land hard on your foot in a treadmill, which directly impacts your knee. So try elliptical, which is a nice way to do it. I also go to a gym at work, and if I have a long day at work, it is really difficult to motivate myself to hit the gym. For me, one of the motivating factors is that, I have a separate gym workout playlist on my ipod, and I really love working out with that music on screaming into my ears! So maybe that would help a little bit?

    2.Or if going in the evening doesnt work, how about in the morning? Well you could start off by going to work early, hit the gym, take a shower, and then start working? It gives you so much more energy for the day.

    3. How about another colleague, who works out too? Plan on a schedule with her, and go in together, so that you have some company there, and can motivate yourself.

    4. If the above 3 dont help, how about some outdoor walking/running?

    5. Like cj suggested, group dance classes are good - zumba/pilates/hip hop workout or something like that?

    6. If you can afford about 500$, then get yourself a personal trainer, who will check on you, if you dont go to a workout, and will be on your back all the time, and can suggest personalized work outs (owing to your knee injury)!

    PS : littlelost, for working out and making coffee I have plan A to Z and also A1 to Z1. So dont lose heart, and set 1 week targets like going to the gym 4 days a week (with the exception of friday, where you can treat yourself)!
     
  4. ivlakshmi

    ivlakshmi Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi Little lost,
    Never feel that you would have done more to save the marriage.. It was destined to end like this it ended.. I use to have the similar feeling that "I must not have done this or played those tricks to save marriage" but after seeing him happy with another women all my thoughts faded away..All I can say is mistakes do happen small or big but most don't end in divorce..there are many men who are really god and understand their wifes..
    If your hubby is meant for u he would have turned good and come back to u.. but there is absolutely no need for us to feel bad about it..
    I think you can cleverly plan the intake of food and easily loose the weight with very less exercise.. dont loose hope, time and keep looking at guys (matrimony sites/friends).. wait some time and watch the situation
     
  5. littlelost

    littlelost Senior IL'ite

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    thank you SSC for the suggestions, I just started working out in the morning, i leave home at 6.30, workout,shower and then start working. I am targeting working out 3 days a week and then just walking outdoors a couple of other days, and its elliptical and rowing machine I use.
     
  6. littlelost

    littlelost Senior IL'ite

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    Thank you ivlakshmi :)
     
  7. teacher

    teacher Platinum IL'ite

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    Most county rec programs have aquatic excercise programs...even in winter. Those are great if you've had injuries. Plus the time required for the same level of calorie expenditure is less than land based excercizes.
     
  8. tinku

    tinku Silver IL'ite

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    Dear,
    You have already turned in to a courageous, smart girl. What more do you want after a divorce? Gone is gone. Need not think about the past which will keep pulling you down. Firstly, resolve this in your mind.

    Second, you can try weight loss foods and exercises. Choose an affirmation like for ex,
    "I am in perfect shape at 33" and imagine frequently. Repeat the affirmation in-between work, while walking and so on. Even if it is once, it will have an effect and become real at age 33.

    Also you can get married again. You are just 32. Many marry at 35 for the first time. So dont worry about it. For marriage, try to reduce weight with diet and exercise. Whenever you feel sad, hear some motivational songs or watch some motivational films. Read inspiring books. Dont give time for negative thoughts.

    You will sure have a happy family in a short while.
    God bless you.

    All the best.

    Special regards,
    Tinku.
     
  9. blackbeauty84

    blackbeauty84 IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Littlelost,

    When I was seperated from my ex, I used to read all the post in the forum. I remember you quite well and looked upon you to find courage. Good to see you have made peace with your past.

    Sorry, I don't have anything else to say to you as I'm more are less in the same shoes as you are. Good Luck dear.
     
  10. littlelost

    littlelost Senior IL'ite

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    thank you all, shy to wear a swimsuit and get into water :(, but once I lose some weight, hope to over come that shyness :)
     

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