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A More Cruel Murderess!

Discussion in 'Saturdays with Varalotti' started by varalotti, Aug 25, 2006.

  1. purnima_2k

    purnima_2k Senior IL'ite

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    Sheela is a serial killer!

    HI Varalotti,

    As usual i enjoyed ur writeup like anything!Initially when i read yours, i kinda agreed with Shardhas views, "maybe she was raped, helpless et etc" and in time she fell in love etc, but after reading chitvish's reply, i am strongly in favour of my opinion that she is not a mere killer but a serial killer! She has been killing Chandrababu not for a day but for everyday till his death , like you rightly pointed out in your snippet .So, that imples, according to me, SHeela is in no way innocent!

    But that does not mean my heart sympathised with Chandrababu fully too. As we all know Chandrababu was not a great looker. So he prob knew that the only way is woo the woman he loved was through his wealth.If he was sensible , he wouldnt have agreed for his wedding within a week!! That shows his impulsive nature too!

    So ultimately i also very much agree with Meena(meena your point was a total bulls eye!), as long as there are people who are willing to be cheated, there will surely be cheaters around!

    So all i can say it poor chandrababu should have thought a bit more, moved with the lady more and try to understand her better before he got married to her.But all said and done,the fact that Sheela was epitomising evil cannot be put under wraps too.


    Purnima
     
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2006
  2. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    Is Sheela Merely An Opportunist?

    Thanks Meena, for taking a new angle and making the discussion a tad philosophical.
    If Sheela got what she wanted, if she just exploited the actor for money, then she is just an opportunist. And Chandrababu is an idiot not only because he married her but also because he could not choose a healthy life path without her.
    I badly wanted to agree with this argument and reduce the gravity of Sheela's offence. My conscience did not allow me to do so.
    Husbands who harass their wives for dowry would now take a convenient shelter under the word opportunists.
    That apart I want all of you to understand the situation from the man's angle. When a woman marries him, lives with him for a while, then confesses some past sins, insists and gets a divorce and then marries somebody else , she is inflicting a hurt on the man's ego and his self-worth. She has made the actor feel that he is inadequate as a man and a husband.
    Well, Chandrababu should have found his own way and should have lived his life is a very cold intellectual argument devoid of any emotional truth which fails miserably in a situation like this. I know many women who were continuously harassed by their husbands. Over a period of time they lost their self-worth completely and could neither live with their husbands nor without them.
    Viewed from that angle what Sheela was - as an ILite graciously put it- a serial killer. She killed a great actors mind and made him wretched for the rest of his life.
    The women who butchered their husbands (as we saw last week) were angels compared to Sheela.
    One thing I have found out living 48 years of life during my 28 years of age is that women have the greater capacity of inflicting harm on men than the other way round.
    Now I want you ILites to pounce upon me with your arguments.
    regards,
    Varalotti
     
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2006
  3. meenu

    meenu Bronze IL'ite

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    Discussion getting hotter!

    Dear ILites,
    the incidentof Chandrababu is wellknown in Tamil nadu but the surprise for me was chithras letter. Sheela had already decided to marry her Uk doc before meeting the actor.Both impulsively tied the knot so fast that chandrababu did not have time to realise that marriage is not comedy. I think he gotcheated because of his vulnerability. Men Or women who do this to their partners do not think of the harm and bitterness that follows. Some peole realise a little late.Relatioships have to be nourished and compromises made willingly and unhesitatingly .Every individual should make an effort to be honest to himself. Only then we can reduce such crimes.
    Regards,
    Meenu
     
  4. Vidya24

    Vidya24 Gold IL'ite

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    Men-grow up & get a life!

    Hi Varalotti & ladies,

    Since yesterday, two posts stay in mind- Meena's philosophical take and Purnima's expression 'serial killer'. Both delve deeper into the issue.

    You say that the argument 'Chandrababu should have found his own way and should have lived his life is a very cold intellectual argument devoid of any emotional truth which fails miserably in a situation like this.'

    Ouch! that hurt cos I was one of those who put that argument across.

    What is the emotional truth in this case? In any such case?

    Be it a husband or wife who is betrayed, the hurt is the same. Intensity and pattern vary over cases. In the case of Chandrababu, he seems to be a simple guy at heart who could not cope with the betrayal. But Chandrababu had factors in his favour too. He had a popular career. if we know so much about Sheela's treachery now, he would have been privy to the same info then.

    My idea is not to trivilaise his sorrow. All I say, is Chandrababu had a choice. He is responsible for how he chooses to shape his life. He is accountable to himself and maybe his fans, on how he leads his life . He had choices, he had options. The path he chose is entirely his responsibility.

    It is not easy. Whoever said that life is easy? One has to choose to get past the trauma and move on. If one chooses to wallow in self pity, it hurts no one more than the victim. Only now Chandrababu was victimising himself.

    Moving beyond Chandrababu, if we generalise this to all women and men, then it is more vital that we learn to move on, grow up and get a life. We owe it to ourselves if not anyone else.

    At the end of the day, Chandrababu had the luxury to wallow in his grief. My nephew had an arranged marriage with a lovely girl. When they reached the US, his wife told him gently that she has an affair with another Indian, in the same state. She had tried telling her parents, but they forced her into this alliance. She decided that it would be easier for her to force her husband to divorce her than get her parents approval. They divorced soon enough and she married her old flame. Within a year, my nephew also got married. Both couples still live in the same area, both have children, careers, lives of their own. They moved on- one thru deceit, the other thru moral strength. But both moved ahead with life.

    Be it man or woman, we are all capable of inflicting a lot of hurt and insult on each another. If every betrayed spouse chose to go the Chandrababu way, our world would be a very sad and lonely place.

    I will not be able to read your reply to this post. But I know it will be good.

    regards
    Vidya
     
    1 person likes this.
  5. Vandhana

    Vandhana Silver IL'ite

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    Hear Hear Vidya

    :clap You deserve appaluse for your post. I have been through the same situation with my brother too. My SIL betrayed him in the worst sense and yes he was emotionally devastated. For a brief period i was worried that he would end up wasting his life. But now, he chose his path, and put all his mind into his career and am pleased to say he is doing very well and put all the nasty experiances of the past behind him.

    your words: He is responsible for how he chooses to shape his life. He is accountable to himself and maybe his fans, on how he leads his life . He had choices, he had options. The path he chose is entirely his responsibility.
    Applies to everyone.

    Vandhana
     
  6. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    Well Said, Vidya and Vandana, But...

    Vidya, your arguments are really powerful and you have a nice way of putting across your point of view. And I have never had such a powerful rebuttal to my arguments in such sweet words. Hats off to you.
    And Vandana, thanks for the support you lent to Vidya and your words of appreciation. Great.
    Now let's get on with the business at hand.
    I fully agree with you girls, that Chandrababu ought not to have broken down like that. He should have brushed aside the whole episode as a speck of dust on his coat-collar and then should have forged ahead on his way. And had you two been Chandrababus counsellors his life, post-divorce would have been wonderful. No denying of that fact.

    But here we are judging the cruelty of Sheela's crime. And what Chandrababu did or did not do cannot come in as arguments of Sheelas defence. Lets for a moment assume that Chandrababu listened to the wise counsel from the most Gracious ILites, Vidya and Vandana (of course should include Sharada also here) and reformed his life, married again and lived a happy life.
    Then will Sheela's act appear less cruel? Not at all. May be the victim mitigated the effects of her act but that does not make Sheela any less cruel.
    Suppose a rowdy is coming to throw acid at an innocent girls face. The girl cleverly ducks herself and escapes the attack. The girl is intelligent. But that does not reduce the vileness of the rowdy's act.

    With this the prosecution rests, Your Honour.

    Varalotti
     
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2006
  7. Vidya24

    Vidya24 Gold IL'ite

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    move for mistrial

    Our dear Varalotti,

    We get to make our closing arguments here.

    Do Vandhana and I resemble pincushions, or maybe vazhapazhams? Is that why you put pins into us?

    Vandhana has a brother and parents who strongly braved a similar issue. And I have a cousin whose wife took him for a costly divorce after three months of marriage.My cousin has immense professional and personal issues even today. So between the two of us, we encompass the entire gamut of the Chandrababu issue. The winners like Vandhana's brother,and losers like my sad cousin. Personal,first hand experiences.

    To use legal jargon, Mr Pleader, if, in your brief ,the only issue was judging Sheela, then we move for suppression of secondary evidence.
    Chandrababu after Sheela- that evidence is inadmissible in this case.

    If u r trying Sheela- she is wrong. We never said she is not.

    But somewhere along, Chandrababu's life- after- Sheela became the issue on trial here. There we say that he should have buckled up and faced facts.

    We,women with tender hearts, join u in lamenting for Chandrababu. Poor guy, bad face, bad wife, bad counsellors.No Vandhana and Vidya to counsel him. U know what, I am sure, even if we had been there and actually counselled him, he would have still gone the same one way-down. This is not a curse on him, I love shuffling Chandrababu with his signature laugh. But he was a disaster programme.

    The defence rests. Truly rests.

    regards
    Vidya
     
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2006
  8. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    I am Moved!

    Dear Vidya,
    Knowing that you and Vandana have your close relatives cheated by Sheela-clones, I am really moved at your desire for a fair trial. If after all that you two can argue for mitigating Sheelas punishment, well, ladies, hats off to you.
    In the same breath I am sending a recommendation to the Govt of India to institute an award for compassion - Param Karunya Chakra - and give the first such award to both of you.
    Now let's turn to the case at hand. Any man being betrayed like that would certainly move towards disaster. Very rarely will such men listen to sane counsel and choose a wise life. The fact that Vandana's brother came out unscathed out of all that is a real blessing. But does that in any way reduce the offence of the vile woman involved? And to say no to this question, whom do we need? The Solicitor General Of India?
    Every year hundreds of women are raped in India. For most of them life after the incident is a disaster. Very few come out of it to live a healthy life.
    While we can all hope wish and prey, counsel and command, such women to forget their past and live their life, we cannot pardon the aggressor because those women did not heed to our advice.
    From Chitras post and other supplementary information we gather that Sheela entered Chandrababu's life with a master disaster plan. (as did the women in the lives of your cousin and Vandana's brother) She had been with him for some time and we do not know what kind of torture she might have inflicted on the unsuspecting comedian.
    Secondly unlike our lives, Chandrababu's life was constantly under spotlight. And this incident became well-know soon. What would be the humiliation suffered by him!
    As you and Vandana said I also feel that Chandrababu ought to have got rid of Sheela from his mind and should have lived his life. But simply because he did not do that does not make Sheelas crime less cruel. In fact it only makes it more so.
    Varalotti
     

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