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‘Generalisations based on gender’- what do you think about it ?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by indianguy2010, Dec 7, 2012.

  1. indianguy2010

    indianguy2010 IL Hall of Fame

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    One female ILite in a thread told, ‘generalisation based on race, religion, caste and gender’ should not be done because every individual is unique. I said, “yes, generalisation based on race, religion and caste” is certainly irrational. But generalisation based on gender may not be totally irrational, as it carries at least some sense in it. From there, I got the idea for this new thread:

    Every individual is unique and different......and can defy to conform to the stereotypes/generalisation described for his or her gender. Yes it is true. But it is also true that some traits can, to some extent, be generalised to one particular gender because they have a biologocal basis. Evolution /Mother Nature /God has done so with some particular purpose behind it.

    There are many such gender specific traits. Let us , just for example, talk about one.

    For example, women tend to enjoy cuddle(both with their kids, loved ones as well as husbands) more than men do. It is because when women cuddle, a hormone by name oxytocin is secreted in her pituitary gland......which builds upinter personal bond stronger. Cuddle (by 'cuddle', here, we mean only cuddle, not followed by physical sex) leading to oxytocin, which further leads to more desire for cuddle.......and more oxytocin.......and more bond. It is a sort of a cycle.

    I do not say men hate to cuddle. But men do not enjoy cuddles. ( please appreciate the difference).

    Because this posterior pituitary secreted oxytocin stuff does not existin men or it exits in minimal amount. Women worldwide get bewildered often,"why my man does not like to cuddle me as much as I do. Does he not love me as much as I love him ?! The only time he wants a hug/cuddle with me is those moments preceding sex. He loves sex only , not me".



    Teddy bears do this substitution to many wives. (how many husbands have youseen cuddling teddy bears ?).

    For some wives the only way, they can have a 'just cuddle' pleasure is during the time they accompany their hubbies as pillion-riders in two wheelers. A tight hug...just hug.........endingin hug gives a strong oxytocin surge in her body..........giving her a much needed emotional reassurance of her bond with her man.

    Men can not understand the above stuff...........because their body does notwork in this way. Yet, men can learn it, upon years of living together withwomen. Men can tolerantly learn to do'just cuddles', slowly. (again, By the word, “just cuddle” , I mean, a cuddle, ending only in a cuddle, not followed by physical sex.)

    The point is...........men also do cuddles. But the difference is, for men it is a learnt behaviour, not a one, driven by their biology.

    Understanding the above said biological basis of why men do not enjoy cuddle.............will itself re-assure a bewildered wife. Not knowing it,will make her wonder in the wrong way............, 'why he does not like to cuddleme. It is because he does not love me anymore."

    This is just a single example. There are some other traits also, which can be generalised to a particular gender. Knowledge about such finer biological differences between men and women willmake one a better , understanding and tolerant husband /wife.



    What do you say, guys ? Want to hear from you.:)
     
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  2. Ragini25

    Ragini25 Platinum IL'ite

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    generalizations.jpg
    picture worth 1000 words
     
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  3. sweetshreya

    sweetshreya IL Hall of Fame

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    Gender based differences are really there because the good lord did not make women and men the same. There are huge differences which everyone accepts. But, there are also subtle differences that baffles each other.

    One such generalization is women cannot park properly. It does not come easily to them they have to learn. Me and DH did one exercise when I was learning to drive. We stood at the same spot and asked each other how wide can you see without moving the eyes. To our surprise, the angle which he could see was much wider to what I could see. We included other friend couple in it. What I and that lady could see was almost equal. Same was with her husband and my DH. But the angle of observation between the two genders was really very different.

    May be you all should do this exercise and tell me if it is really true. I'm little curious.
     
  4. Radhai

    Radhai Platinum IL'ite

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    Good Lord! You can write the world's largest book. :!:
    But but.. every book of yours will have the same topic. :shock:
    Hmm.. now that's a problem.

    [​IMG]
     
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  5. fencesitter

    fencesitter Platinum IL'ite

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    looking for a scientific discussion? if we understand everything about each other, life may become boring and monotonous. let the nature's mystery be as it is.
     
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  6. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    IG,

    If not much trouble, would you take the 'tu' in your signature and make it the third word instead of first? Thanks. :)

    Oxytocin will make men and women take up cudgels for a simple cuddle. :)
     
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  7. aminroop

    aminroop IL Hall of Fame

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    not just every book, but every chapter of every book!
     
  8. aminroop

    aminroop IL Hall of Fame

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    jus one doubt, sir...

    is it cut copy paste from multiple web pages?

    cos every paragraph is of a different font. :)
     
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  9. indianguy2010

    indianguy2010 IL Hall of Fame

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    I knew Poornima, you will develop this doubt. I typed in a separate MS Word document and then copied & pasted.....not from different web pages.
     
  10. indianguy2010

    indianguy2010 IL Hall of Fame

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    True.Most threads of me r on this context only. Because I find this topic fascinating and more controversial than any thingelse.
     

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