How unfair she is!

Cheeniya · Mar 1, 2007

I just can't understand this woman. She is so very unpredictable. What pleases her today can make her as mad as a wet hen tomorrow. My attitude towards life in general and to her in particular has always been pretty uniform. Is it not, therefore, natural on my part to expect her reactions to what I do also to be pretty uniform? No, Sir, they are not! I need not tell you how difficult it makes my life. And the greatest irony is that she keeps complaining that I make her life difficult!

The other day I was tossing in my bed trying to get some sleep. It was one of those trying days when our confrontations exceeded the average per day in number and intensity. I could hear her voice clearly floating in from the drawing room.She was engaged in an animated conversation with someone over the telephone lamenting that she was at her wit's end to cope with the tantrums thrown by me. I thought that it was the unkindest cut of all. I could see my nerves bulging out in my hands like Nagarjun's in one of those Telugu movies. Needless to add that there was no question of any further sleep that day.

I am a very fair-minded person. I am always ready to look into the argument that the party of the other part may have some substance in holding me responsible for all the mess, provided it is backed by some concrete evidence. So whenever I am at peace with myself I do some soul-searching. I ask myself if I really give her too much trouble as she seems to feel all the time. I run some of the recent episodes, that very nearly had us wanting to murder the other, in my mental screen. I subject each of them to a thorough scrutiny. Everytime I end with the feeling that I had acted with the purest motive but it was she who failed to look at it in its proper perspective.

What is even more confusing to me is that some of my actions that give her an acute rise in her BP are subject matter of envy among her friends.And she never loses the opportunity to brag about them when she is with her friends. Now tell me what would you consider this as? I have no doubt that, if you are a right thinking person like me, you would consider her bragging as an endorsement of your action. No Sir! If you ever come to such a conclusion it will be a fatal mistake. Try doing it once again when you are alone with her and you will see what I mean.

Another point that can never be understood by me is that her mood swings must always be accepted and appreciated by everyone else but any small variation in others' moods are scoffed at by her. One day she might be feeling too bored to cook and we all make a beeline to a classy restaurant. But if I feel bored to go to school. she yells at me. If she drops a pot of milk, it is an accident but if I do it, I am a juvenile delinquent. She will even go to the extent of alleging that I do it everyday on purpose just to make her life miserable.

When I see her struggling to make some food for a few unexpected guests, I try to show her how faster and easier it can be done and does she appreciate my gesture? Not at all. She shouts at me at the top of her voice asking me to get lost. 'The bigger fool invites some people for dinner without giving me a minute's notice and the smaller fool makes it even a greater challenge for me' is how she insinuates that I might be conniving with my dad!.

And when the guests arrive and settle down for dinner, she says "I wonder if I could have made all these at such short notice but for my Little One's help!" and hugs me. It is on occasions like this that I get totally confused. Why is she not consistent? I can give you thousands of such incidents when she has acted this way. Tell me, for a six-year old like me who has already plenty of things to worry about, how do I cope with a thoroughly inconsistent mummy? .

PS: A grandfather ghost-writing for his grandchild!

vivbass · Mar 1, 2007

very sweet boy...... nice post.
also the ghost grandpa:2thumbsup:

Naveena · Mar 1, 2007

Dear Cheeniya,

It was a very good write-up. Made a good reading, the way you have narrated a child wondering at the strange behaviour of elders is really nice. The expression of innocence towards hypocrisy was really touching. Thanks for the same. Bye.

Veena.

vidyasarada · Mar 1, 2007

Poor little angels ! It really must be tough being a child, having to deal with inscrutable adults.
In the first place, adults are physically bigger, like giants,from the kid's eyelevel, and on top of that , they behave strangely. But we, adults, continue to think childhood has no tensions !

A well observed, well written , thoughtprovoking article. 'From the mouth of babes' comes truth and we would do well to put our mind to it.
If we position ourselves in the child's place and keep observing our own behaviour, I'm sure we will all learn to mend our ways and be more reasonable characters than we generally are !

I find your writer's-device of not divulging the identity of the protagonist till the penultimate paragraph very endearing. It contributes tautness to the script.

Regards
VS

jothi · Mar 2, 2007

Dear Cheeniya,

Very Nice article. I loved reading it. The importance you give to minute details is amazing.

Thanks,
Jothi.

Chitvish · Apr 17, 2007

I just can't understand this woman. She is so very unpredictable in her timings. Am I tempting her or does she have the audacity to think, I will fall for her one day ?
Well, I can’t help diasclosing that, suddenly, I am becoming uncertain about myself ! I have always believed that “A thing of beauty is a Joy Forever”. But this “ joy” is haunting me all the time, parading before me in full glory typical of only a “nattu kattai “.
No doubt the song rightly says that the nattu kattai is dhimsu kattai as well !! I am perplexed – I who take the highest corporate decisions effortlessly, to the admiration of my colleagues.
Does oily, neatly plaited hair make me sensuous, having been used to permed and colured hair, I am used to, of late ?
Can a simple co-optex saree, which looks normally “in-sipid” look to me so “made for her” as if ? That only proves, with the "onslaught" of western wear for women, saree is still unsurpassed, in "hiding, but revealing".
I did’nt realise, kajal or kanmai was traditionally used by women more to lure men & twirl them around their little finger !
Not to talk of the big red bindi, which is becoming obsolete in “indraiya nangai” !
Do I happen to go, where she is around or does she come where I am around ?
But our house needs her desparately & I am also a part of the house !
You, silly, can you not make out whom I am talking about? None other than Anjalai, our, curvaceous, young latest servantmaid ! She has no right to disturb me like mad.

Love,
Chithra.

sudhavnarasimhan · Apr 17, 2007

Dear Chitra,
What a rejoinder to the Granpa's ghost writing! now i wonder who you are ghost writing for!?:idontgetit:

Anyway, a good one on our own Dhimsukattai .....but Chitra tell me, do the maid servants come dressed still like the way u have mentioned, have they not been affected by the Modernism in dressing culture!? Thats cool then na? :tongue
But honestly what an imagination!!!!

Chitvish · Apr 17, 2007

Dear Sudha,
I was ghost-writing for a modern young man ( can be middle aged or old also!), in whose house a "dhimsu kattai" struts about, disturbing him, much to his unbelievable annoyance !
Well, Sudha, that breed has not vanished ! I have one from "country-side". With V retired, I make sure about, you know what ?
Honestly when I read your words
Granpa's ghost writing
I wondered for a sec, whom you were referring to ! :idea: :idea: No, Sudha, I know you won't !
Love,
Chithra.

Cheeniya · Apr 17, 2007

Dear Chithra
There is no greater appreciation than an attempt at imitation! That too by a writer of your calibre! You have indeed made my day
Your post reminds of a Tamil hycoo that I read a long ime back which roughly translated in English runs as follows:
We have a new servant maid
My house is now very clean
But my mind so dirty!

Though the banter between you and Sudha is all Greek and Latin to me, I'm enjoying it!
sri

Malathijagan · Apr 17, 2007

Wondrefully written!At first I thought that it was the husband lamenting about his wife.Only half way through did I come to know that it was a kid and only inthe end that it was a 6 year old! Good suspense! and for the message that you wanted to convey-"That is what women are!" And we women have the same lamentations for men folk too!

cheeniya said: ↑

I just can't understand this woman. She is so very unpredictable. What pleases her today can make her as mad as a wet hen tomorrow. My attitude towards life in general and to her in particular has always been pretty uniform. Is it not, therefore, natural on my part to expect her reactions to what I do also to be pretty uniform? No, Sir, they are not! I need not tell you how difficult it makes my life. And the greatest irony is that she keeps complaining that I make her life difficult!

The other day I was tossing in my bed trying to get some sleep. It was one of those trying days when our confrontations exceeded the average per day in number and intensity. I could hear her voice clearly floating in from the drawing room.She was engaged in an animated conversation with someone over the telephone lamenting that she was at her wit's end to cope with the tantrums thrown by me. I thought that it was the unkindest cut of all. I could see my nerves bulging out in my hands like Nagarjun's in one of those Telugu movies. Needless to add that there was no question of any further sleep that day.

I am a very fair-minded person. I am always ready to look into the argument that the party of the other part may have some substance in holding me responsible for all the mess, provided it is backed by some concrete evidence. So whenever I am at peace with myself I do some soul-searching. I ask myself if I really give her too much trouble as she seems to feel all the time. I run some of the recent episodes, that very nearly had us wanting to murder the other, in my mental screen. I subject each of them to a thorough scrutiny. Everytime I end with the feeling that I had acted with the purest motive but it was she who failed to look at it in its proper perspective.

What is even more confusing to me is that some of my actions that give her an acute rise in her BP are subject matter of envy among her friends.And she never loses the opportunity to brag about them when she is with her friends. Now tell me what would you consider this as? I have no doubt that, if you are a right thinking person like me, you would consider her bragging as an endorsement of your action. No Sir! If you ever come to such a conclusion it will be a fatal mistake. Try doing it once again when you are alone with her and you will see what I mean.

Another point that can never be understood by me is that her mood swings must always be accepted and appreciated by everyone else but any small variation in others' moods are scoffed at by her. One day she might be feeling too bored to cook and we all make a beeline to a classy restaurant. But if I feel bored to go to school. she yells at me. If she drops a pot of milk, it is an accident but if I do it, I am a juvenile delinquent. She will even go to the extent of alleging that I do it everyday on purpose just to make her life miserable.

When I see her struggling to make some food for a few unexpected guests, I try to show her how faster and easier it can be done and does she appreciate my gesture? Not at all. She shouts at me at the top of her voice asking me to get lost. 'The bigger fool invites some people for dinner without giving me a minute's notice and the smaller fool makes it even a greater challenge for me' is how she insinuates that I might be conniving with my dad!.

And when the guests arrive and settle down for dinner, she says "I wonder if I could have made all these at such short notice but for my Little One's help!" and hugs me. It is on occasions like this that I get totally confused. Why is she not consistent? I can give you thousands of such incidents when she has acted this way. Tell me, for a six-year old like me who has already plenty of things to worry about, how do I cope with a thoroughly inconsistent mummy? .

PS: A grandfather ghost-writing for his grandchild!
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