1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

How Do You Control Your Anger?

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by anika987, Feb 27, 2020.

  1. Tamrakshar

    Tamrakshar Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    726
    Likes Received:
    1,186
    Trophy Points:
    263
    Gender:
    Male
    Yes Anica, your grievances maybe genuine. Relatives are always like this. I am sure everyone has a story to tell in this regard.
     
    anika987 likes this.
  2. deepthyanoop

    deepthyanoop Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    427
    Likes Received:
    530
    Trophy Points:
    175
    Gender:
    Female
    Anika, "you are too sensitive", " you can't take even a joke" is the comments mostly used by bullies to gaslight their victims. Yes,you are right about soft spoken persons being the target. Even in IL I saw some examples. While being soft and too polite is a good trait,but in todays age and world you need to step up sometimes for yourself. There was an old member here with username ' guess who'. I remember reading her threads about being assertive,how to handle unnecessary comments from bullies etc. Check on that. Everyone has a limit and you just reacted when your limit had come.
     
  3. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    545
    Likes Received:
    664
    Trophy Points:
    188
    Gender:
    Female
    The reason elders advise on controlling anger is that when one is angry, they are more likely to blurt out lines that could hurt others very bad. Even a moment of anger is not good. I got very angry 5 yrs back for something my father said, actually it hurt me, though it was nothing bad, I got angry and jealous and rage overtook my thinking. I put a comment on facebook in response to his comment which was totally unnecessary. I removed it later, but ever since I posted it, I have regretted it. Lashing out isn't bad, but you should be careful not to say words that you cannot take back and that you will regret later. Just be careful. It is like using a weapon, if you use it carefully, it will come in handy, otherwise it can work against you.
     
    anika987 likes this.
  4. Angela123

    Angela123 Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    655
    Likes Received:
    829
    Trophy Points:
    188
    Gender:
    Female

    NO. This is not blown out of proportion. I do not think so. If I were to face that comment, I would definitely be insulted. if the child has constipation, they should take the child to a good doctor. Insulting anika is not an option. Like anika mentioned would they do this to their DIL? They would think twice before they say something like this. FOr them Anika is an easy target to bully, because they will see her only at events (I am guessing) and then they don't have to face any consequences, in this case they are sure Anika is submissive and respectful to them so they are taking advantage. Everyone's level of happiness is different, when someone is feeling insulted, to their state of mind, others should refrain from insulting again. The threshold is different for everyone, @Tamrakshar you might be able to take it in a less offensive way, but I will not be able to tolerate.
     
  5. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,117
    Likes Received:
    2,686
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    Vaikuntha, deepthyanoop and anika987 like this.
  6. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    12,969
    Likes Received:
    20,846
    Trophy Points:
    538
    Gender:
    Female
    thanks sunshine..
    It is sick people use this form
    Of manipulation..
     
    EightKittens and deepthyanoop like this.
  7. Anusha2917

    Anusha2917 IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    2,575
    Likes Received:
    7,022
    Trophy Points:
    408
    Gender:
    Female
    What OP faced is clear case of bullying by the relatives.
    Sorry but the example quoted doesn't justify the harm one is doing by bullying.
    In above case Sachin's superstitious act doesn't harm or demean anyone. It doesn't put anyone down.
    The example is irrelevant and I'll be very honest here. :flushed:
    If the baby can't poop it's the baby's problem and the problem of the parents who made the baby constipate. It's neither funny nor a light hearted banter to say such a statement. I pity their (those who said those statements) sense of humour .
     
  8. Roar

    Roar Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    632
    Likes Received:
    980
    Trophy Points:
    188
    Gender:
    Female
    Wow!

    Isnt this the Anika we were all wanting to see!. Well done Anika!... what a flip! hopefully your future posts will be in these lines too ergo we are eager to see the fighter in you!. Keep going!
     
  9. DavenaRosalie

    DavenaRosalie Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    177
    Likes Received:
    77
    Trophy Points:
    68
    Gender:
    Female
    Anika dear just let it go and don't care what they are going to say. It's your right and you don't need to feel sorry for what you did.
     
    anika987 likes this.
  10. SinghManisha

    SinghManisha Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,011
    Likes Received:
    2,683
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    Superstitious about pooping ? That’s a new low !
    A poop for a poop will leave everyone dirty !
    @anika987 you are hanging out with the wrong crowd .

     

Share This Page