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5 Year Old Has Lots Of Fears

Discussion in 'Kids Korner' started by beingmom, Jul 13, 2018.

  1. beingmom

    beingmom Silver IL'ite

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    My 5 year old boy is fearful of many things. For example, he doesn't whistle, loud noices, any twist in kid movies, water and much more. He wouldn't even want to play in the public park if there are more kids playing.

    He's been going to daycare/school from his toddler age and gets along well with his friends in school. But always afraid of a new environment.

    This concerns me a lot. How to make him feel confident and bold?

    P.S - our family environment is healthy.
     
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  2. GeetaKashyap

    GeetaKashyap IL Hall of Fame

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    You may consult a Child Psychologist to help you. Please request your Paediatrician to refer you to a good Psychiatrist or a Psychologist.
     
  3. vidhyalakshmid

    vidhyalakshmid IL Hall of Fame

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    If you are a believer of God you can teach your kid any sloka (if you follow hinduism) or your religion `s saying. Ask him to memorize and to repeat whenever he feels fearful. It surely will make his mind strong to face the fear.
     
  4. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    I think it must be something related to what or how you felt when you carry him.
    Just think about it, and see whether you could give any clue to the child psychiatrist when you take the child for a check up.

    One of my nieces had this issue, not an extreme case though.
    It was because my cousin had escaped from a deadly fire accident from an event when she carried her. That fire accident killed some of her friends, and many wounded too. It was even in the media that time.
    Though my cousin seemed OK and quickly recovered from that event, I think she carried the stress inside.
    She had smooth pregnancy and easy delivery too. But now, the child shows symptoms which must have been connected with that fire incident.

    There was another case, when a mother felt extremely scary during her delivery as it was natural birth and she wasn't mentally prepared to face that pain. Somewhat, the child is very afraid, and their Dr's said it must have been related to those few hrs of stress that mother faced.

    All those cases were cured within few consultations, and the psychiatrists were able to give these kids some home works and tasks, that helped them grow fearless and confident.
    It is great that you pay attention as they are young. It is easy to cure at this age than later
     
  5. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Platinum IL'ite

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    Resistance to new environment is acceptable.
    But not for long duration of time.
    1)Encourage him to play when more kids are there in park
    2)Take him to swimming/gymnastics/ martial arts class any class that's physical activity is involved.
    3) encourage him to pray and if you're religious tell stories how god protects and cares
    4) improve his self confidence and let him play outdoors often.
    5) if nothing works cosult child psychologist
     
  6. 1Sandhya

    1Sandhya Platinum IL'ite

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    Sounds like he feels overwhelmed around more kids or noises. Is he with you constantly and very attached to you? it could be that he is very comfortable with you in your home and not willing to explore new situation. And the minute he expresses little discomfort you are unable to say no and agree quickly to take him from there. Try this: create a situation that you will be unavailable for 30 min to 1 hr like you have to go to market or something. So he has to be with Dad and both of them have to wait for you outside near the park till you return. He can wait for you or play till you get back. So like it or not he has to be there, yet there is a trusted, known person with him, and he knows you will come back soon. Dad can acknowledge his discomfort but promise that mom will be back soon, expressing helpnessness, what to do, we have to wait till she comes, why dont you go play etc. Make this a daily affair for a month. And see how it goes.

    Rest of the other things sound normal to me. amusement park with loud water sounds all this is for older kids. he may not take to it at this age and thats ok. wait till he is 7 or 8 and try again. It is very normal that he doesnt like the twist in a kids movie. I would be careful about which kind of kids movies he is seeing. Not all kids movies are for 5 year olds. Even famous ones. For eg., finding nemo the mother dies in the first scene. It can be a big shock for a 5 year old kid. such movies are for older kids. A 2 hour movie can be long for a 5 yr old. Their attention span is max 30 mins then they want to move around. Show him known TV movies which are basically like an extended hour long episode of his favorite characters or episodes of winnie the pooh, dora the explorer, blues clues maybe some episodes, not commercially produced kids movie, and definitely not Pixar movies. For that you have to wait.
     
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2018

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