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Was Remaining Single A Better Option???

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by senoritaaa, Jul 23, 2018.

  1. senoritaaa

    senoritaaa Bronze IL'ite

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    Just a hypothetical question to all the married women out there....

    How many of you sincerely wish now that
    1)Should have remained single in life.
    2) FOcus on your own personal, spiritual growth etc
    3) Have a good job and become financially very stable and with the money enjoy life by doing travel, and other things that you were actually passionate about....
    4)Do service to the society if whichever way u can to have a sense of fulfillment(If you are passionate about it)
     
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  2. charanya147

    charanya147 Silver IL'ite

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    Really all the married women would wish to......
     
  3. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    Grass always seem green on other side. Many unmarried women also think that their life could have much better if they get married. No situation is perfect.
     
  4. Jemma

    Jemma New IL'ite

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    I wish I was single..I want to travel..I want a good career, I want to focus on my own growth..But Marriage has given me a beautiful daughter and I love her to death. A child's love is soo unconditional..It is so pure...being a mother is a best feeling...I wish I was single and had a kid ( Not sure if the society would have approved it)
     
  5. Sweety82

    Sweety82 Gold IL'ite

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    Unmarried people see married people as lucky and they have a family to look after even though there are misunderstandings and fights between couple. married ppl think being single will give them peace of mind. but on the corner of these married peoples mind, they think atleast we have a family, because remaining single will load insecurities on their mind as years pass by.
     
  6. shama146

    shama146 Gold IL'ite

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    It is human nature to not to be satisfied in whichever condition we are.

    No matter whether we are married or single we will always envy the other side. Everything has it's share of positives and negatives.
     
  7. pinky2cute

    pinky2cute Platinum IL'ite

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    Single life -
    1) freedom to live as you want
    2) freedom to take care of your parents
    3) freedom to earn and spend as you like to
    4) freedom to be free about stressful life and responsibilities of spouse,kids n his parents
    Negatives -
    1) once you cross 40-50yrs, you will feel the loneliness when parents are not around anymore and siblings if any would be busy on their own lives.

    2) you will be tired of parties freedom and wish you could come home to someone waiting for you wanting to share your feelings.

    3) no active sex life - its important even though marriage is definitely not necessary to have sex but its dangerous having casual sex.

    4) no kids - again, this may or may not be negative depending on people. Some maybe married and yet not want kids. Some want but cant have kids after marriage. While being unmarried some do wish to raise kids either adoption or by using sperm donor.

    Positives and negatives of married life -

    1) end of the day you know you have someone whom you can take all your anger out on...have fights...yet want to hug that very same person whom you just wanted to kill lol (read DH).

    2) you have something to call "your home and your family" no matter how much arguments maybe there.

    3) having kids born out of you

    4) secure feeling of not being alone (ofcourse unless someone is in a bad abusive marriage)

    5)once you are too old unable to take care of yourself...you will atleast have ur life partner or kids to be with you.
     
  8. BhumiBabe

    BhumiBabe Platinum IL'ite

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    I think, in our society, being single makes people very uncomfortable- especially when the single person is of an advanced age. Once married, my status as a woman solidified, compared to being single - I was still treated as a child of my parents. That perception makes it seem like we haven't achieved anything (even if we are doctors, engineers, social workers, etc), until we are also married and settled.

    I feel like less woman would feel the need to get married, if we are treated as competent and full-decision making human beings when single. I don't think men have the same type of situation. There is less pressure, and any career goals or even loses are accepted as normal parts of their growth and achievements. Marriage is a perk, that they get to experience once they are more stable and comfortable.

    Yes, I wish I was single, but respected as I am now. Not how people saw me when I was single.
     
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  9. Sani12

    Sani12 Bronze IL'ite

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    No, but i should have married someone else probably. Some one with his own life and not some one not living with his parents. Before marriage i thought these were all superficial things and why can't a man live with his parents all his life! Now that i have seen it from the other side, i know that an independent man is a better husband.
     
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  10. nakshatra1

    nakshatra1 Platinum IL'ite

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    I am happy being married . Ofcourse , after marriage you have to take decisions jointly and are accountable for every little thing . But there's also happiness from the sense of responsibility, and the sacrifices we do for our husband and kids .
    And we have to appreciate that our husband also makes sacrifices for us . I appreciate that my husband works so hard for our future and takes care of so many things . It's all about perspective .
    It is true that we have less freedom to take care of our parents , but that is something we need to discuss with husband and there will be a solution . It's true that we have less freedom to spend our money but if there are reasonable restrictions for the future of our family then it is fine . Even I want to do service to society . And I think that can be done . We just need to balance our time and energy .
    At the same time , I feel that marriage is a personal choice and society should not pressure women to get married . Everyone should decide for themselves what they really want out of life .
     
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