How To Be Assertive In Life

Be yourself is the best thing, anyone can do.

I can be assertive at work, it is not that hard. It is the profession, or it is the methodical way, a discipline.

In personal life, one cannot be assertive all the time.

If I have to be assertive in a friendship, that person cannot be my friend. I tend to avoid such a circle.
It could be my social anxiety / phobia?

Especially during my visit to India, I felt that I have to be more assertive to avoid trouble. When it comes to my family social events or with my in-laws, I am clueless. I need my mom / sisters / aunt / husband's help...half the time, I cannot understand, what do they mean by that? It is not the language, that hidden message, "political agenda" that really bothers me (like an encrypted message). Even, my niece / nephew seem to be better at it. I just smile, politely nod, and let others answer for me.

I tend to behave quite to hide my social anxiety. Unless, I am comfortable, I will not "open" my mouth by nature....my own defensive behavior against the aggressive people?

 

A good topic for discussion.
Being assertive is one of the best quality which I believe highly helps in self-awareness and understanding of others.

My golden rules for assertiveness,
1.Be Empathetic
2.Talk from personal point of view always always...
3.State facts and no judgments.
4.Label behaviors not personal attacks...
5.Ask questions but Listen more.
6.Express your inner thoughts in an appropriate way.
7.Validate other's opinion/feelings
8.Be clear,confident and collaborative.

Combination of 1 to 8 works better in most of the situations.
However,
Being Assertive sometimes becomes aggressive. The both has a very fine line,when there is a lack of self-awareness possibility for aggressiveness is high.

Purely my lifestyle and my point of view.