Neighbor Making My Life Hell

Yeah Sunshine..but I know for sure that I didn't talk so much about fights with my Mil .Since everyone was talking about their Mil i also said very generally that mine is bad and has given me a tough time .Actually what happened was that I told her that my in laws do not respect my parents and I don't like it when there is a function at home and I have to invite both the sides.now her mother is always in her house.i thought that she started maintaining distance coz she didn't want her husband to get influenced .She is very clever.anyways I was o.k with her maintaining distance .even though we are neighbors and it is good to have a cordial relationship with everyone but I had no problem. My problem is what if she is doing my character assassination and people are believing her.how do I convince others not to believe her.she is a stay at home mom and is available and I go to work I spend less time in the park and at home in general.I don't want her to spread false rumours about me.But I am not able to find out what she is saying.

 

Hi Monika...yes that is what is bothering me.I really am not able to find out what she is saying about me.When I get time and I try and take my daughter to the park and call people..they give reasons for not coming.I don't force anybody. I don't want to come across as too needy of people around but at the same time I want to make sure that she is not saying anything ill about my character .i know she can go too any extent to get closer to the group .Coz she stays in a house below mine I can hear her talk Bad about other ladies in the colony .her mother even abuses them behind their back but I can't tell anyone coz people don't want to come face to face with me.

 

Hi Cinderella ...she is not that dominant.i was the one that introduced her to the gang coz both of us came in the area around the same time.i used to go to the park and knew people fast.right now I know that I can't fight or shout at her coz I don't have any proof.but I know that she is saying something really bad that people are avoiding me otherwise I don't think people would do that for minor stuff.i wish someone would tell me coz the day I'll get to know..I will fight with her.its been over 2 years .i still don't know.she has developed some great friendships..they all go out party together with families and me and my husband feel a little alone.

 

Yeah I have been ignoring but at the same time I am losing my peace of mind.i wanted to be friends with everyone around.i wanted the kids to play together.invite each other for birthdays .she is getting to do all that and I am being sideline and ignored .i wish someone would tell me so I can fight with her and ask her to stop once and for all.I am very disappointed and more so on people that are listening to her .she likes to take her mother everywhere and I am very sure her mom tells the other ladies something that is why people are getting influenced. I once heard her mom telling her to do stuff so that I get isolated completely.If I am going out somewhere , she will check with all the girls if I went out with them.next day her mom would ask her where I went and she would tell her that I went on my own . I was just feeling that it is sooo easy go spoil someone's reputation.you just have to take advantage of someone absence .feeling very very low and helpless

 

Hi Sangeeta,you are right.my heart says that I should move but my mind says that this is what she wanted and I don't want to give her this happiness that she created this situation for me that I had to move out finally.i want to tell her that I am strong and will not get affected by you.i am more qualified and independent than her and the thing that is annoying me so much is that this one person is able to change my life so much. I wish O had known a way to handle such politics.when I go to the park, no one is there..it is a little uncomfortable . When she goes,she goes in a group and when people see a few girls sitting together..more people join them.and I am not getting a lot of time as well to go to the park everyday coz I am working and at times i am so tired that I just want to go home and rest.

 

Hi sandy ..thanks for the message .yeah ...that is why I am soo confused.i don't know wht is she telling others and why are people trusting her.why can't people come and tell me.the thing is she is more available and more in scene whereas I am not there mostly and go to the park rarely coz of time constraints .and every time I go I see people act weird with me. I have moved on..my daughter has made friends outside the neighbourhood but I feel sick when I see that one person can affect my life so much and is enjoying all the attention she is getting by badmouthing me.I wish I had known how to handle such girls

 

I wish I could do that.she acts as if she wants to deliberately avoid me.evertime I pass the stairway,she would just run inside.if she is standing with the next door neigbor.she will see me and run inside their house making it very obvious to them as well that she doesn't like me and wants to avoid me.infact some new people moved into the ground floor.i am working at not at home mostly so I have not seen who has moved in.even she does the same thing.she would also shut her door when she'll see me walking downstairs.i don't even know who they are and I have seen this girl coming out from the new neighbors house a few times . I wish these things were taught in school.I feel like a complete loser. Confronting her is not possible coz she doesn't come face to face with me ever.and I know she will act all innocent and wil deny everything and will feel happy when she will get to know that I am losing sleep over these things and her plan is working

 

Thanks After reading your post I feel that I should move out of the mess and stay somewhere else where there is more peace and people are good . I know it will be worth it.but I really wNt to prove that this lady ( my neighbor) is not nice .

Thanks for the message Shweta,Your message is inspiring me to move out of the neighbourhood and go to a new place and make friends there and be away from all the negativity. My heart says that I should move and my mind says that I should fight her and stay there and show everyone her true face. I just don't know how to confront her.I did make an effort and called a few people and asked them but they act weird and they tell me that nothing happened and things are all ok and it's just that they are a little busy.I hope there was a way to tell people not to trust her .but she has been successful in getting into the group by badmouthing me and getting all the attention. It hurts to see everyone getting invited to birthday parties and nobody invites my kid☹️