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Good Old Days...

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Jeeves, Nov 20, 2017.

  1. Jeeves

    Jeeves Silver IL'ite

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    Yes Nandini
    It is lovely to travel down the memory lane and visualise the golden days !
    Now everything has become commercial..Aw!! I am off tomorrow to Guruvayur to attend my hubby's niece's wedding Wonder how it will be as the boy is from North..Must be fun for all I know !
     
  2. Jeeves

    Jeeves Silver IL'ite

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  3. nandinimithun

    nandinimithun IL Hall of Fame

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    Maybe it will be a lovely, fantabulous and a colorful wedding with both north and south....
    Have a lovely time and enjoy
     
  4. Jeeves

    Jeeves Silver IL'ite

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    Yes very true Pushpavalli.Simple marriage and a good reception. I would also love to add that these days the brides spend a lot of time at beauty parlours...the Reception hours that are support to start at 6 p m are dragged as the Bride comes after her make up only by 7 or 7.30 p m .!! It is really annoying !
     
  5. Amica

    Amica IL Hall of Fame

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    I am so looking forward to this and to more of your posts. :)
    .
     
  6. GeetaKashyap

    GeetaKashyap IL Hall of Fame

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    @Jeeves
    Hi! Nice jog along the memory lane. I enjoyed it thoroughly.
     
  7. HazelPup

    HazelPup Platinum IL'ite

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    Loved every bit of your write up. Nostalgic indeed.
     
  8. periamma

    periamma IL Hall of Fame

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    @Jeeves Wow what a description:clap2::clap2::clap2:.Those days marriages are ten days celebration. I have written a snippet in Tamil with the same theme.well written dear
     
  9. jayasala42

    jayasala42 IL Hall of Fame

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    Very well written.

    Those marriages conducted in 1960s and earlier were performed in a similar manner.The maappillai azhaippu oorvalam the previous day and the procession taking the newly married couple round the streets on the wedding day.
    are things of the forgotten past.
    Coffee for sambandhis and coffee with tobacco for the card playing goshti brought unforgettable experiences both good and bad.
    Ordinary quarrels gained momentum in stop-wedding and conducting wedding with a different bride or groom in the same pandal.
    Who can forget 'Washingtonil Thirumanam' by the great writer Saavi and the'sambanthi sandai described therein?
    There was a wedding in which the thali( thirumangalyam was lost) and my mother removed her thali and substituted and managed the situation that it is customary to use the thali of elders during weddings.
    During my sister's wedding Kesari was mistakenly prepared out of Gingelly oil and my shrewd mother sensed the same before serving sambandhis .Immediately she arranged for preparing 2 kg of sooji with ghee.Otherwise it would have resulted in'walk out by sambanthis.
    She was so clever that she suggested the cooks to prepare sojji appam, a rare item during dinner utilising the kesari made of gingelly oil.
    There have been weddings with sorrowful memories.
    My mother was an expert in doing seer bhakshanams. We never engaged cooks.
    10 days before the wedding when she was preparing big Somasis,the thatched kitchen caught fire and the mud oven burst.the big kadaai containing about 6kg of oil was toppled and the entire boiling oil along with burning hot kadaai fell on my mother who was sitting down preparing the bhakshanam.The fire was put down.Amma had severe burns in both the legs.Doctor was brought home .There were blisters throughout the leg.After four days blisters were broken open and she had a big bandage in both her legs.
    But nothing could be stopped.We sisters and aunts managed the entire show with the same paraphernalia.
    My mother could just crawl to the wedding hall to do kannika danam.It took more than 40 days to get things normalised.
    After printing the invitation, and within a week before the wedding,if the elderly mother or father of the bride passed away, the marriage was not stopped.The bride was given in adoption to some uncle through mantras and marriages were conducted as usual.
    In 1970, when the bride's grandma died the previous day in the hospital, the marriage was conducted as though nothing happened and reception alone got cancelled.
    Now we have to spend nearly
    Rs 15 lakhs for a decent wedding and a middle class parent suffers a lot.Luckily now a days they have max two children only.
    Wedding rituals have lost the charm.It is no longer a get together.If the wedding is fixed on working days, guests just mark their presence, go straight to dining hall and give the gift through someone.
    Many parents do not even know how to prepare an exhaustive list of things to be done, groceries to be purchased, how to estimate probable number of guests and so on, since most weddings are on contract basis.Throw the money and you get things done.
    Like any other change, this also has to be accepted and the old weddings are memories of the past.
    My friend's daughter was totally against wedding rituals.Especially she hated the sastris and mantras.She was for a regd marriage only.It so happened that while working in Mumbai she got in touch with an Iyer boy and they wanted to marry.
    When they enquired in Registrar's office,they were informed that they would put up a notice board and if no one objects within 21 days the wedding could be regd.Otherwise if they are in a hurry, they should have Hindu customary marriage and certified by a purohith.The boy and the girl were not prepared to wait.The next Sunday they hired a classroom in a school, brought a Maharashtrian pundit, conducted sapthapathi and other rituals as per Hindu customs and got the cert from the sastri.Next day marriage was registered.At least the bride groom's mother would have been happy had she been invited to see the wedding ritual. They lead a happy life.But the girl is adamant that they should not give birth to children as she considers it her primary national responsibility not to increase the population by one or two numbers.Strange is the way people behave!

    More than gala weddings and the pomp and show, the young girls and boys getting into wedlock should understand and realise the significance of harmony and try to understand each other respecting each other's strength and weaknesses.
    When we see disharmony creeping up even before the festoons fade and the entire pomp vanishes.Let us preserve the harmony unless under extremities.


    Jayasala42
     
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  10. Jeeves

    Jeeves Silver IL'ite

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