Relationships Forum Chatter & Grey Matter

Grandkids wouldn't I think. They love their grandparents based on affection, because kids are smart that way. I think parents and DIL/SIL would find it a little awkward though.

 

The old tradition is for "girls to marry UP, while boys to marry DOWN". This is when the DIL has to go and live in a collective family, and will not have the subliminal (or explicit) tendency to compare/contrast what-she'd-left and what-she'd-got, and lament the situation. And besides, from every point of view of the tradition in indian (and chinese) families, this (i.e. girls marrying UP) would be the best combination.

• The new DIL would appreciate her good fortune, and be easily adjustable.
  
• The parents of the girl would know their place, and not have any reason to behave uppity -- in both body language, as well as in words.
• The husband would know that he is the master of homestead, and cant be talked down to by his wife or her wealthy father.
• and many more reasons...

Grandkids would naturally like the wealthier g-parents, especially if they are generous with fancy gifts. For a child, an iPad would beat a T-shirt any day.

 

I am happy that IL is not grading our submissions here. Your prompt is almost suggesting an answer. Yes; it will be awkward for the not-rich. And more so, if the parents of the rich are dense enough to behave like the bollywood movie characterization of rich folks. My thoughts are veering off to the tangent on whether wealth begets a set of behavioral patterns.
If there is an exam here, I'd likely flunk it. And be sent off to a tutorial college for subjects that I will have in arrears.

 

Tina Turner turned up in my mind when I read that post about "love and respect".... in the real-meaning-of-marriage thread:

 

What are you trying to say,Rihanna? Jibes apart, I am sure you had a point to make, when you lost it in mocking me.

 

If it's the girl getting married to rich family, mostly the girls mother is submissive and won't give any suggestions or opinions or interfere in her daughter's life. Father of the girl behaves as usual. But on the other hand if girl marries to a poor family or an average level family,then girls mother in most cases can make life hell for in laws by interfering and behaving like a superior.

GrandChildren till their innocent age would not show any difference to both set of grandparents. But once they gain some sense they would have an inclination to the richer ones bcos of the costly gifts that they may receive.

 

Is it right for a Dil to start working leaving her dependent widow mil alone at home for 10 hours. Unfortunately her husband is working in a different city since a year and can visit only once a month. Her kids have now started degree college. So Dil has lots of free time at home. Financially there is no need for her to work as her husband is earning well.

Mils another son n family is in a different city. But mil feels suffocated there as she has no privacy in watching television or being in her own world. It's a matchbox type flat and anybody who is inside 24 hours will get suffocated.

Mil is in her 70's and can't do her own cooking. She has age related health problems like BP diabetes and body pain. She can't walk outside the house without any personal help, so she remains indoor always.

Mil is basically a shy reserved introvert person who has no problems even if no one talks to her in the current house. Atleast people's presence was enough for her.

Dil has got a good job offer now. She has never worked in her whole life as she had kept her husband and children needs as top priority. She was not on talking terms with her mil, but would always take care of mils food requirements properly. Mil had it all ready on the table.

Wonder if it is right on her part to take up the job. They would never keep a maid in their house for mils company.