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Please Help Me To Decide!!

Discussion in 'Infants' started by ssainv, May 9, 2017.

  1. ssainv

    ssainv New IL'ite

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    Hi all,


    My baby is 5 and half months old now. My inlaws are taking care of him. They will be here for another 2 months ( baby will be 7 and half months) .We are planning to go to India for his first bday which is in december. But hubby has parenting leave for 3 months which he has to take before my lo turns one. So hubby wants to take leave from september to december. I dont have any such kind of leave at my work. I am planning to ask work from
    india option but not really sure if they agree for 3-4 months.(i can work for a month and + take my 2 weeks vacation = 6 weeks total). And also my H1B is picked so i cant go till october anyway.

    So in meantime i am considering all my options.

    Should i put my son to daycare from 7 and half months to 11 months ? (considering i cant go to india)

    Should i put my son to daycare from 7 and half months to 9 and half months(till september) and ask hubby to take care at home till 11 months?

    Should i send both hubby and my lo to india from september and me going for a month near to his bday??


    I am in total dielemma. Not sure what to do? Please help!!
     
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  2. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    If I face similar situation, I will not leave my baby like in option 2 or 3 as the baby is fully dependent on mother and so tiny. It is tough for me to leave my baby. So I may go for day care if I were in your place.

    My kids started daycare around 8 months. I bf up to 1 and half years. Will that be affected if you leave your 5 month baby. Will that affect you? Are you Ok to send baby away? What is your dh's opinion?

    I have seen one friend's case- her baby(six month old)& dh stayed in India for six months while she works here. So any option is possible depending on your comfort zone.
     
    Last edited: May 9, 2017
    blindpup10 likes this.
  3. ssainv

    ssainv New IL'ite

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    Hi DDream


    Thanks for replying though. Its very hard for any mother to leave baby as i also do.

    I am not ready for that but just thinking of options.

    I dont want my hubby leave to go wasted here. He went to india back 3 years ago and since he got the parental leave for 3 months which is like a golden opportunity in software field, I want him to go atleast.

    Else we three will just stay here and go sometime close to bday.
     
  4. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    I feel that you three go to India close to bday will be the best option. You two get enough time to adjust when ILS leave. It is better to have someone with you and baby while you go to India especially in >20 hour flight. In USA you will find many daycare that works well. They take care of the baby well.
     
  5. ssainv

    ssainv New IL'ite

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    Thanks DDream. Appreciate your response and wishes.
     
  6. blessings1010

    blessings1010 Gold IL'ite

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    I too vote for the same option. Live here until the bday comes and go to India together. It is going to your first long flight with a baby. You will need all the help there is!
    Also, what do you mean by H1b picked up?
    Make sure you join the same location for work which you got approved for H1b, if the work location changes, the employer needs to update H1b..Not sure if this applies in your case. But talk with your employer before making long term vacations/ move.
    Good luck!
     
  7. ssainv

    ssainv New IL'ite

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    Thanks blessings1010.
    My H1B is picked in lottery and i will be returning back to the same location after my trip.
    Yes i am considering option of we going all together near to bday.
     
  8. ssainv

    ssainv New IL'ite

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    Thanks ashneys. I liked all your ideas in splitting the things will all of us three.
    Will do whats best for baby since that is my first priority.
     

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