Keeps worries at bay "What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish?” "You can’t tuna fish.” What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish? Every morning you’ll rise and shine! Why aren’t koalas actual bears? They don’t meet the koalafications. What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk. A senior citizen called her husband during his drive home. “Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on Interstate 90. Please be careful!” Herman replied, “It’s not just one car. There’s hundreds of them!” I went in to a pet shop. I said, “Can I buy a goldfish?” The guy said, “Do you want an aquarium?” I said, “I don’t care what star sign it is.” Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato? The lettuce was a “head” and the tomato was trying to “ketchup”! What’s a foot long and slippery? A slipper. Did you hear about that new broom? It’s sweeping the nation! (No pun intended) Source : web