What Things To Do To Find A Happy Contented Feel Within Yourself?

Discussion in 'Education & Personal Growth' started by sweetygal, Sep 24, 2016.

  1. sweetygal

    sweetygal Bronze IL'ite

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    I am a working lady from a joint family.The thing is that my in laws take care of house very well that i just have to pop my head in house hold matters here and there for the sake of it.In the morning & evenings at home , there is nothing i have to do till i go to and come from work. I need suggestions from you reg.what i can do to make my life go without being bored. I decided to clean each shelf ,table ,corner on daily basis that I will feel like i am doing something. I need to do something - which will make me get out of my bed in passsion in the mornings and make me feel good about myself to make my soul happy.

    Please don't suggest me how i can change my thinking to feel good. I am ok with my thoughts and in laws.
     
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  2. sweetygal

    sweetygal Bronze IL'ite

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    seems all see this question as irrelevant ??:disappointed:
     
  3. dnormx01

    dnormx01 Gold IL'ite

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    Please join art or music classes. It will keep you busy and you Learn something new.
     
  4. aspha

    aspha Gold IL'ite

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    Take up a hobby, join gym, zumba, music lessons, knitting, sewing, gardening, book-clubs or if languages interest you, you can start learning a new language like Japanese, Spanish, French...
    I started learning dance (Kathak) after a gap of 11 years. Last 7 years have been sheer joy and full of energy and contend feeling.
     
  5. sweetygal

    sweetygal Bronze IL'ite

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    thank you for the reply..
     
  6. MNR

    MNR Gold IL'ite

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    How long you have been married? Do you have Kids? Kids will engage you full time.
    Why cant you start cooking either in the morning or in the night? Don't leave everything to your in laws

    To be frank, person who owns the kitchen is the queen of the house, men respect them more. So first try to conquer it. Cleaning and all takes backseat. No matter how much you do, you wont feel satisfied

    Actually I was in the same situation as yours. In law's take care of home very well including my daughter. So everyone feels that my MIL is the one who takes care of her totally. Though i do everything except after her school. I used to feel like a guest in my house..
    Cooking also only cutting vegetables.

    After my daughter born i.e 4 years into marriage, didn't have confidence that could manage home.I somehow decided to change myself..

    I cook breakfast, while MIL prepares Lunch for office. . weekends I try to cook whole meal, not all the time possible though. I try recipes which MIL doesnt know, I get whole credit for it, other wise everyone sees MIL taste in it.

    This way DH, DD will be excited about weekends that I would cook something different.

    Laundry I do, folding the clothes, rearranging show unit, Voluntarily takes up grocery/vegetable shopping . Earlier I was not knowing the prices of these.
    I started doing gardening. Takes DD to cycling.

    Now I dont have that guest feel. My DH also feels that I am responsible can handle home

    sometimes lazy to do all these, somehow I push myself. MIL doesnot leave entire kitchen to me, still I do some thing everyday for my satisfaction.

    Keep telling yourself "I am the owner/queen of this house". This way you will be motivated
     
    Last edited: Sep 27, 2016
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  7. Thangakkodam

    Thangakkodam New IL'ite

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    Try preparing one special item of your interest on evrry sunday evening for snacks or light tiffin during tea time
    You can consult your m-in-law and try to learn from her a traditional recipe which is a speciality in the family and try preparing it once a week which can be enjoyed by all the family members and you can also get satisfaction.
     
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  8. Lakshmi6197

    Lakshmi6197 Gold IL'ite

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    OP if your MIL teaches you how to cook your hubby's favorite foods, she is a keeper. Most foods you can learn by recipes posted online. But the food that your MIL cooks is usually her signature. If she does it, please be grateful coz very few do it. I don't get from your post whether your MIL is taking care of the house because she wants to keep you out and retain her control or because things will be easier for you if she takes care of the house and you can concentrate on your career and take it easy as long as she can do it. Sooner or later you will have to take over the day to day running of the house. Please make a suitable judgement as this will then determine your course of action.

    Either ways, I would suggest that you start taking a gentle but incremental interest in the day to day activities of the house. You have to ultimately take care of the house so if your MIL falls sick or needs to go out of station, you should have an idea of how to function in this setup. A smoothly run house is a well oiled machine which takes a lot of effort to manage. I have a lot of differences with my MIL to put it mildly, but learnt a lot about how well she takes care of the house and admire her for it.

    I guess you don't have kids coz people with kids are usually overstimulated never bored :p Take up your hobbies again. Do whatever makes you happy. Take care of your health and your husband's health. If you have time and opportunity, please learn yoga - it is a life skill. Go for walks if possible, listen to music and have a small puja routine everyday. Be grateful to god for what you have. Wish you a happy and content life :thumbup:
     

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