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Rock The Sahm Role ✌

Discussion in 'Home Decoration & Improvement' started by Bubbles, May 4, 2016.

  1. chillbreeze

    chillbreeze Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Akila, I do the same too. I update the budget sheet before I logoff for the day and make a list of the things to be done for the next day. And I agree with you about preparing/following lists and our mom/mils time. To each his/her own.

    Good to know..just hang in there...things wil be better soon.

    Hehe sure...I just feel I am so lazy what will I do when a kid enters into the picture.
     
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  2. Bubbles

    Bubbles Silver IL'ite

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    Yesterday was a bad day for me, because of me. I let small things work me up to mammoth proportions, and in hindsight can't fathom why I got so bugged. Baby has started refusing meals - and though I've been aware that this was bound to happen at this time, between trying all kinds of tactics to get her to eat, and explain to H. what all I'm trying (he's really anxious too) and getting frustrated about the undone work in the house (couldn't cook, kitchen is a mess, rice and urad dal soaking since 2 days now - have to throw it, what a waste!) and H. not able to help me out by caring for baby (he had a reason) and getting irritated at my asking him to do small things..I burst out.
    It was stupid really. I should have taken a time out. Instead, when he acted up, I responded in kind (after trying to be calm several times), and he reacted and it went on till something snapped in me and I lashed out at him. I have never lashed out at him like this, despite all my difficulties. Now I really regret my behaviour, and though I apologised properly to him, I am still discomfited about my behaviour.

    @cliona good to know things on the roll. (Hugs)
    @BDivya join the list-lover's club:hello: (there's no hi-five icon?!) I am penning it too, because I'm short of time to sit at the laptop..but do use all kinds note taking apps on my phone :D You're so right about things changing after marriage.. now I make lists for H. too ;)
    @chillbreeze you'll be just fine.. I have a theory : work expands or contracts to fit the time available.. for example, before baby I used to easily spend the whole morning (trying to)cook.. now I can sort of do it in 1-2 hours..when my daughter lets me :p

    Hmm feeling a little more normal now after responding to your posts ..
     
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  3. AkilaMani

    AkilaMani Local Champion Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    @BDivya, So true, life changes so much after marriage and after kids it again changes :)

    I too was a list person before marriage, but it was only with my study schedule and later work. After marriage and before kids, the lists were more mental and written was only work related. After kids and discovering that I was lagging on so many fronts made me go back to having written lists for things to be done around the house, and the list of lists is growing :)
     
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  4. AkilaMani

    AkilaMani Local Champion Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    @Bubbles, yes, I too feel that milestones of life need not be parties, they have to be meaningful and celebrated with people who mean the most. It now feels like too much importance is given to the material aspect of the celebration than anything else.

    I do ask them to help out with chores and they do it willingly (mostly) as they are used to it from an early age. I started with them tidying their toys after they had finished playing when they were 1+ :biggrin:. We had a tidying up song and it was so nice.... I miss those days.... now the elder one has started inviting friends over for group studies:nomouth: they grow up so fast.

    The thing is most of the chores are done when they are in school. When they come back everything is in order. So although they may not think much of it now, they may go on to think that I maintained a perfect home. They don't see me doing much work except for cooking and dishes.

    Yes, the son-in-law pitching in part is the one I too hope for... and it is mainly the reason I encourage my DH to help out around the house. When the kids see their dad doing chores, they are more likely to see it as normal and have expectations based on it. Of course, that is not the only criteria, but you get the point.

    :) :)
     
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  5. AkilaMani

    AkilaMani Local Champion Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Same pinch :) I also mostly do it at the end of the day, but sometimes I like to do it in the afternoons.
     
  6. AkilaMani

    AkilaMani Local Champion Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Its ok bubbles, hugs to you. I too have done the throwing out of rice and urud dal and felt bad immensely.
    Again its ok to lose your cool. I am not encouraging it, just that I know how it feels, I have done it many times. Usually, H will not react when I am angry at something. He will try to comfort me, or if he also is upset, he will leave. I have learned (still learning) this from him. it is a process and it comes naturally to few but not to many like me. So, its really ok. learn from it and move on. Take care.
     
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  7. BDivya

    BDivya Platinum IL'ite

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    Though im not a SAHM, i would like to participate in this thread :)

    weekend: Quite a well-cooking-well-cleaning-days i should probably call them!! I made traditional banana leaf kinda spread on sat.
    Prep-onion & drumstick sambhar, garlic rasam, keerai porial, keerai mash, curd and rice!
    Sunday- Prep naan & butter panner masala, which turned out pretty PRETTY well! :)

    And on both the days cleaned the house and tidied the toys wen DS was asleep (but again became a mess once he woke up!) did the laundry, folded, cleaned kitchen.

    This weekend (unlike others!) got time to watch 2 movies that too in TV with the breaks involved!! Felt happy after a long time to watch movie in the TV!!
     
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  8. cliona

    cliona Silver IL'ite

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  9. cliona

    cliona Silver IL'ite

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    Hi bubbles,
    Put all aside dear........ Ups and downs...... Always in life !! Right ! Weekend was again bad for me too. Couldn't do any cleaning or organising or planning. Hubby is moody ! I am also moody( mood swings ??!?!) Bad combination. So to cheer myself up....went to ice age , collision course...movie with sister and maternity shopping! My daughter wasn't interested to come to movie like her dad !
    Need to organise place for new baby stuff.... Scratching my head for that ... Don't know where to start... Please suggest girls
    Regards,
    Cliona
     
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  10. BDivya

    BDivya Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi congrats on ur second!!! u can start with the wardrobe as a start. If u can afford a new cupboard/shelves/wardrobe for the new one then its fine. Else u can reorganize ur elder ones' wardrobe, find out which ones needs a place and which ones can be given a retirement! Arrange the elder's in one side of the closet and make space for the younger in the other side.. So that this practice can continue even wen they grow up. They can share their stuff and place.

    U can use ur creativity for making the nursery in the same room as ur elders'. All these just needs a reorganising activity. With this reorganising thing u get to know so many unused/not needed stuff which can actually create room for newer stuff!

    All the best and share ur story wen doing reorganise! My 2 cents :)
     
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