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An Accountant Pays Homage To An Accountant!

Discussion in 'Varalotti Rengasamy's Short & Serial Stories' started by varalotti, Sep 19, 2011.

  1. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    It’s all over now. The man who gave me my life and livelihood, the man to whom I was dearer than his own life is dead. 81 years of life! 81 years of struggle, of pains and pleasures, of accomplishments and defeats, of agony and ecstacy came to an unceremonious end at 8 20 AM on 14th September 2011.

    I had a highly disturbed sleep on 13th night and hence could not get up at my usual time at 6. I was woken up by my cell phone around 7 AM.

    The call was from my mother.

    ‘Appa wants you to come down.’

    I ran down stairs. He was complaining of chest pain. Well, that was not quite unusual. He had a mild heart condition, diabetes, and added to them weak kidneys. I was with him for a while.

    He said that the pain was now bearable. So I came up for my morning ablutions, posted PS and then went down again to see him.

    The pain had come again. ‘Let’s go to the hospital’ I told him. ‘I can’t move. Call the Doctor.’ The Doctor did not pick up the phone.

    By that time the pain had increased. My mom suggested that he should have something to drink. She stood up to leave; my father did not let her go.

    Fortunately Indhu who had gone out for a walk came back. She prepared a cup of Horlicks. My father finished that drink.

    I was sitting by his side. I now told him that I will go fetch the Doctor and thereafter we could by guided by his advice as to admitting him in the hospital.
    “No. Don’t go. Sit here. Hold my hands.”

    I did. Holding my hands he was lying down and sitting up again and again. We all asked him what was the matter. He was gasping for breath.

    Then holding my hands he lied down. I could see peace descending on his face which had hitherto been distorted by pain.

    The laboured breathing had disappeared and his face looked very tranquil.

    “Appa.. Appa.. APPA.. “ I called. Then my mom called. There was no response. My father was dead.

    I badly wanted to break into violent sobs but could hardly do it. I had to first fetch the Doctor for the official confirmation, which I did.

    Then started the painful task of calling my brothers, sister, my daughter and other relatives. And there were a thousand things to do. I knew very well that my mother was continually looking at me and if I broke down her condition would be worse.

    I had to put up a show of strength which was no small strain.

    I had to lose my pretensions for a second when my sobbing daughter flew into my arms later in the afternoon. And then my sister and my two brothers. But by and large I remained stoic; at least I thought so.

    Move forward. Two days later. There were so many expenses. So many chores. So many arrangements. But you know we are a family of accountants. My father was an accountant all his life, though not a chartered accountant.

    We, his three sons, are CAs. One of my brothers unfolded his Thinkpad and opened a fresh worksheet. With the help from the other two we soon had a system of expense-sharing and cash-flow management to take care of expenses already incurred and expenses likely to be incurred in future.

    As we were proudly looking at the result of our professional expertise – our combined post-qualification professional experience is 73 years – in walked our mother leaning on the shoulders of our only sister.

    “It’s Appa’s wish that you should not spend for his funeral and other expenses from your pocket. More than five years ago he has set aside a decent sum of money for that purpose.”

    “But you have it, Mom. We’ll have it deposited in your name.”

    “No, it’s his wish that it should be used for his obsequies.”

    “But we may have to prefer a claim to the bank and establish the succession and get the money.”

    “He knew all that. That’s why he has been keeping the money in hard cash not minding the loss of interest.”

    My old man is surely a better accountant than us. And he proved himself to be the father of three accountants.

    The time was 8 PM on 14th September, 2011. I was sitting by the side of my father’s body. I thought about the unique relationship we shared.

    When I was in my school I wanted to take part in a picnic which in those days cost hardly Rs.10. My father refused to give the money. I was upset.

    “This month I’ll give my entire salary to you. If you can save that money, yes, you can go. After all there’s enough time to pay.”

    I agreed.

    Thus started my very first lesson in accounting, funds management and family finances. We all led very simple lives.

    Appa commuted by bus. We did not have a cable TV or a washing machine or an AC; not even a gas connection. And yet to save Rs.10 was very hard. I did it, no doubt. But then did not have the mind to splash it on some picnic.

    When I was in college we were facing tough financial times once again. My father’s salary was not enough for the family. I and my brother were in college; the other two children were in school.

    My father’s salary had just touched the four-digit mark. We had let out a portion of our house to a Government office. And yet we found it hard to make both ends meet.

    My B.Com results came. I got the University’s First Rank. Andhra Bank offered Probationary Officer’s post to the First Rank-holders of the three Universities in the State. The salary was Rs.2200 per month, more than twice my father’s salary.

    I told my father that our good times had started. He was not enthusiastic.

    “You always wanted to do CA?”

    “That’s right, Dad. But this offer is too good. All our troubles will be over.”

    “But then you’ll be a B.Com throughout your life. You’ll be dependent on a job and on an employer. Exactly like me. You see I will be a B.Com all my life and will die so. I have to, but why should you?”

    “There’s no other way, Dad. How can we manage? If I go for CA it may take three four years before I earn.”

    “So what? We can cut corners and somehow manage. I’ve already spoken to my boss who has reserved a seat for you in the CA firm that audits our company. You can join them this August.”

    “But.. Dad…”

    “That’s it.”

    The rest, as they say, is history. Not only I but both of my brothers did CA and today if we are placed well in our lives, it’s thanks to his vision.

    14th September. 9: 00 PM. Cremation Ground.
    The family priest asked us to drop a handful of rice on our father’s mouth. We did.

    When it was my turn I simply could not stand the mockery.

    Here was lying a man who was responsible for every food grain that went through my mouth. Here was lying a man who gave me my life, my profession, my livelihood and my honour.

    And I was mocking him by throwing a handful of uncooked rice on his dead mouth. As I was going round his body the pent-up grief burst forth. I collapsed on the ground wailing. Nobody could control me for a while.

    My son-in-law lifted me up and took me to the bathing section. I was crying all the way.

    Appa, even if I were to be born your slave in my next birth, I can’t hope to clear the debt I owe you.

    No, Appa, you are not a good accountant.

    You have left our accounts in eternal debit. And with these huge debit balances how are we ever going to balance our books, Appa?
     
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  2. satchitananda

    satchitananda IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Varalottiji,

    I really have no words. We are fortunate to have had such marvellous fathers who have left behind them a rich legacy of memories and good examples to live up to.

    As you said life must go on and I suppose it is this very fact - the simple day to day routines - that help us pick up the threads of our lives and go on. Also the knowledge that we have done our best by them and that they were and will always be proud of us (no matter where they are) gives us the courage of conviction and strength to go on.

    "I fear no foe with thee at hand to bless
    Ills have no weight and tears no bitterness
    Where is death's sting, where grave thy victory
    I triumph still if thou abide with me
    "
     
  3. paanzaa

    paanzaa Gold IL'ite

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    The philosophy- is dead and gone. Adi Shankaara has said- Punarabi jananam, punarabi maranam... We as adults have failed to understand that we are kids to our parents most times. I had a silent prayer besides my father's body- Appa, naan enna thappu senjurnthalaum ennaya mannichudu...The last time it was when we had a compromise. It was usually fights whenever we both had the occasion to interact. And he would budge down saying whatever- we wont fight again. I was wondering whether I would be like him in this aspect- When ten rupees was a matter to reckon, the life's learning has been priceless.

    Whatever realization that takes place- is one when the most important person who brought us to this world is not there.

    What to say else, if these words would comfort- Pitchai paathrim enthi- Antha Pitchayai illatha pothu...
     
  4. SARASVADIVU

    SARASVADIVU Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Sir,

    When it's such a tough task to gather myself here..to even give an fb..how painful would have been all the happenings of the past 5 days!

    Sir, just has he had guided you to become a C.A. and thus set the edifice for your life ..sure will he be continuing to do it-the only difference being that this time his 'Abode' is different!!!

    To write yet another detailed and analytical fb, as normally could be done for P.S...is simply not possible sir; however getting myself to do it..words seem to fail me, after having read such a poignant homage to your Appa:
    "You have left our accounts in eternal debit. And with these huge debit balances how are we ever going to balance our books, Appa?"

    Take Heart Sir!!!
    Regards & love,
    Saras
     
  5. rgsrinivasan

    rgsrinivasan IL Hall of Fame

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    Perhaps the first to come and last to go, is guilt, Sridhar. What I could have done, to still see him around, is the biggest thing that looms big. Losing a dear one is never easy, however old you are. My heartfelt condolences to you and all your dear ones. Your father must have been very proud to have you all. -rgs
     
  6. Saraswathipv

    Saraswathipv IL Hall of Fame

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    Sridhar Sir,
    Touching one indeed.
    Having lost my amma a decade ago, when I was a student, I can understand when you say, that you had to show that you are strong in front of one parent as the other one's soul has departed.
    But beleive me, you will indeed get the strength from you Appa, to be stronger in the days to come.
    It was a great lesson with that 10 rupees episode. And hats off to him for insisting you on your CA, inspite of, big opportunity for you. I always believe, parents know best. Sometimes (only sometimes ) their decision may not seem right, but their intention is always right, and that is more than enough a blessing for the children.

    With prayers for you and everyone in your family...
    Bye
     
  7. manjulapathy

    manjulapathy Senior IL'ite

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    Dear Sridhar!
    I am really shocked to read about demise of your father.I was choking when I was reading. Indeed it is shocking to know that suddenly the person to whom you were turning to for advice and wisdom is no longer available. At any stage of life, the death of a parent rouses lots of emotions.
    Life has to move on. My condolence to you, to your mom and to the entire family.
    For once I will not say it is very well written because I know the pain you went through.
    Manjula
     
  8. raji2678

    raji2678 Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Uncle,
    Very sorry for your loss. But at least, you were fortunate to be with him in his last moments. May Gos give you and your family the strength to bear this loss.

    But I belive in rebirth. I am sure that your father will be again reborn in your family.

    Raji
     
  9. vjbunny

    vjbunny IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Sir....,
    Its a huge shock to learn of the sudden demise of your father....My words are failing me to say what I want to .... May God give you and your family the strenght to bear the loss...May his soul Rest in Peace....
     
  10. sudhavnarasimhan

    sudhavnarasimhan Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Sridhar,

    I can imagine what you would have gone through .....i know its difficult to give vent to the emotion at that point when realisation hits that this loving person who gave us this life is NO MORE! And like you had written it will be easier to turn to the mundane chores of organising than accept this FInality of Life! I felt the same 4 years ago when my father passed away and i also controlle dmy tears and broke down when he was actually laid out of the house for the rest of the rituals,....how i fought that those final rituals of washing him etc should be done inside in a dignified way, but i could not fight against the Tradition.....thats when i broke down , like you had written at the mockery of it all! Yes it is a big loss, a part of us gone forever....but i always sense hima round me, so i guess you will also feel his presence in everything around you now though he will not be physically present! I told Indu that you will all miss his physical presence and the emptiness will set in once all the people leave! I guess finally thats all Life is about ....it takes a second for that Breath to leave us forever isn't it! Anyway take care as Life has to GO ON!
     

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