Journey started but lost path.....

cutekid · Jun 12, 2009

“Have you taken the prenatal vitamins”...”Haa baba” was my reply to my hubby.We just returned from India after our 2nd wedding anniversary.During the stay everyone was teasing me & asking me when we are going to have baby.After we returned I surfed the internet,googled & found whatever was written about conception & good healthy life style.Not even a single day I missed my vitamins.Finally it was supposed to be my ovulation day & I tested with ovulation strips...”Hey ther is no line L I told my hubby” he said “Never mind we will try today”,”But if I dont ovulate,I cann’t conceive,so lets wait”...We waited till we got faint line on the strip.
Then started the long wait of 2 weeks.I prayed,I kept my pregnancy test ready.And finally the wait ended..no periods...and there was a faint positive line on my pregnancy kit...we both were over whelmed,happy & top of the world.I wanted to tell my parents & in laws.Waited till few more weeks and told them.They were so happy.Soon I started receiving calls from my close family memebers to whom our parents might have conveyed.I was about to finish my 1st trimester,was very happy,since I didn’t have any trouble & the worst part was going to end.I was going to be mother in next 6 months.I wanted to tell everyone.My waistline was increasing day by day.I made a pregnancy ticker as my signature at Indusladies ,joined the Due dates clubs,was enjoying my pregnancy .One day suddenly I saw drop of blood.I was so scared at that time I just returned from work.I thought if tommorow I dont feel well I will take leave from work.But in the morning I was feeling good.I went to the office.After the routine work ,I felt so weak & suddenly I started to bleed.I was rushed to emergency at the hospital.It was H1N1 flu outbreak & due to safety concerns they dint even allow my hubby to accompany me during my Ultrasound.The doctor gave me injections to stablise,we were back.My family members said its normal.I will be fine soon.But unfortunately on the subsequent ultrasound we came to know we lost our baby.It was not growing & have to go for termination.
I wanted to enjoy this journey of motherhood,we craved for it,we were blessed for a while & god has taken away my child from me.I stand before him to pray,but I dont ask him why he has done so.My mind has stopped asking or begging for mercy.I prayed hard & begged him,but he didnt hear to my prayers.If he wanted to punish me then he should have punished me & not my child.I have seen my hushband so hurt.Almost on the verg of crying...I want my child ..I want my baby back.If I loose again I will shatter completely.Please I dont want to go through this again.

leenatitu · Jun 12, 2009

Dear Cutekid,

I am so sorry to read about the pain you are going thru. dont lose ur hope and faith in GOD. Believe that everything happens for the good reason and that GOD knows what is good for his child. Take care of your health. You dont believe , in this week itself, i heard nearly 6 cases like this . 3 of my friends and 3 of my known circle. All married recently. I guess this is a sign that we female are really becoming weak physically.....

May GOD bless you with a real cutekid....

Rdgs,

Leena

Ammukutty · Jun 12, 2009

I know how hard it is to take this...dont worry dear,as your user name you will soon be blessed with a cute kid...Just have faith & hope....All the best!

Parimalat · Jun 13, 2009

Please don't worry!! God has something in store, may the babay if born would not have been happy, may have had problems..So its better that god made his decision..All of us go throught this. My mother had 16 abortions and My brother and me were born to her after 13 years of marriage when she lost hopes.This is miracle of God where she did Nagapratishta in rameshwaraam. Believe in God. Pray to Subramanya. Read subramanya Ashtakam. Everything will be fine .My mother is so happy with us.I have a son too.Don't worry Everything is for your good!!U have a loving husband to feel proud!!

sulaksuresh · Jun 13, 2009

Hi Cutekid

Your post really touched my heart. I can very well understand your pain as I went through the same thing twice in my life. Do not worry and lose hope. Have faith in God, I am very sure that you will be blessed with baby soon. You will be in my prayers everyday. Take good care of yourself.

with concerns
sulakshana

ssusha123 · Jun 13, 2009

hi cutekid,
as sulakshana mentioned, even in my life also, this had happened twice and third time i conceived and gave birth and now my daughter is in 12th. she is an outstanding child, she know everything means everything say singing, dancing, knitting, drawing, painting, designing, gardening etc. etc. the list is endless. everyday, i thank God who had given me such a lovely child. the bondage is such that we share everything and she is my best friend too. i am so proud of her. why i am writing this is that God only knows whom to give, when to give and what to give. He is the best judge and i strongly believe in that. so dont worry. past is past. may be He may give you the best gift. so believe in God. He is the Supreme Power.
Wish you all the best
usha.

manjulapathy · Jun 14, 2009

hey cute Kid!
Dont worry. God Knows when to send the child to you. That child was destined to have only that many days in this world. Whatever happens is for good. Keep up your spirit and enjoy life. You will be blessed with 'cute kid' soon!

cutekid · Jun 15, 2009

Hi All,

Thankyou for ur kind words & good wishes for me.I wish all the women like me should be blessed with healthy baby.Nothing more I want from life.

Anabika · Jun 15, 2009

Hi Cutekid,

Please be strong and I can relate to it as my sister underwent the same thing and it was so hard for me too. But, soon she was blessed with a girl baby and she is a little angel. You will be in our prayers and hope to hear the good news from you soon.

Kutty_80 · Jun 16, 2009

Dont worry .. really it is very sad... dont give up ur hope ... sure u will get a kid ... it will happen soon by god's grace. we all with u in prayers.