Hating myself for my deed

It looks like issues have cropped up after the MIL came into the picture. You let an outsider influence you so much that you yelled at your own baby.

Forgive yourself. You did something wrong and regret it. You did not mean it.

Your first priority is your child. You have seen, first hand, what happens when you let the H and MIl affect you. Focus on your child with a renewed vigour. Steel yourself up such that his actions, words or your MIL - none of these affect you.

Next, have a heart to heart talk with your husband. Tell him in a polite but firm manner, how his actions affect you and what hurts you. No drama, no tears nothing. Then let it go! Ignore. No matter what - do not respond. When he sees that you do not care, he will come back!


Good luck

 

You cannot change others, you can only change your own self. Repeat this many times. Then decide you cannot change others (incl him and MIL). So work on yourself and then eventually decisions will emerge.

 

Please let your anger go in some other way and take a decision that u will not yell at ur child. Always smile when ur with child. It will make u feel good and anger will reduce or go away.


U r in pain but still u need to bear it like all women do? How come he assumes about all women? Such type thinking and not understanding you , will result in to him sleeping in that second bedroom alone or along with ur mil more and more. It is ok , if u ignore that he will come to ur bedroom.

 

Forgive urself. DONT ever do it again.
You are a huan being too. Forgive urself.
That baby will grow up to be your biggest strength. You know, my 8yr old son gets furious at my husband even if he speaks loudly to me! Rofl !! He ignores when i shout.
I hope i dont turn into a monster mil because of this!!

Cheer up OP, give that baby a 100 kisses to make up.

 

1. Your son is "furious" if DH speaks loudly to you. But ignores if you 'shout'. And you encourage and laugh at this behavior of your son? Is that healthy what your son is getting to learn by differentiating dad and mom?
2. Your son should not even be in the middle of these - you dont prevent him by saying its not applicable to him what dad and mom talk?
3. You let him think poorly of his dad?

 

Cut yourself from slack. Your husband is being unfair to you. "Other women" do not bear the pain. Their husbands understand that a woman's body has been through a lot after a delivery (especially after a C Section). Sit with him and talk to him peacefully about the problems you have. Calmly.

 

OP- Be kind to yourself. You are human and will make mistakes. The fact that you realize you made a mistake makes you a good person which is more than I can say for your husband. Instead of being supportive husband and father, he is being callous and selfish.

Going forward make sure you keep you child out of differences between your husband and yourself.

 

OP,

many moms go through such emotions after delivery.Just forget about theinstance of yelling at your child and move on.Go for walks with your little one.After your MIL leaves,talk to your husband and bring him to do some help for you or spend time with kid.

 

Dear OP,
Think about yourself and your baby. Why are you so insecure about your husband? In your condition, you are thinking of intercourse? Give yourself and others a break and let your husband go to hell. Good for you if he sleeps separately, it is not like he is separating from you. If you can't do it, don't force yourself, you are not meant for his enjoyment, you have your own personality. When you get to a state where you can think of doing other activities, you can do them, why worry right now? Don't expect him to pitch in. And if you ask me, don't let him pitch in, because that will also mean unwanted and unnecessary inputs which can be an added headache. Just let it go.