Being treated cheaply at work.. How to overcome this!!

Discussion in 'Working Women' started by Nand, Mar 20, 2014.

  1. Nand

    Nand Senior IL'ite

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    Hi,

    gap between me my H increasing due to some issues. Of those one is my stress at my work. I started a thread in married life And all ladies suggested me for personal issues but work related they advised me to start thread here. So...

    i am in us from last 10 years and have 2 kids 6 yrs and 1 yr.
    I started working only from last 3 yrs. I had my work permit even before having my older kid and started applying for jobs, but as soon as i started i came to know that i am pregnant and my sisters marriage got fixed and i need to go to india. So i stopped by job serach and then had my 1st kid. Then my kid was not feeling well so until he was around 2 - 3 yrs often i use to think i should work and drop again as i couldn't leave him as he was not feeling well. But due to the above lady not helping me in getting a 2hrs job at doc office which i needed just for relaxation as i was getting depressed as my older kid was not feeling well, me and my H decided that i should go for regular job. Then i started my job search and with in a month and with my first interview itself i got a job.


    But i never worked before as u know in us we keep fake resume and i could well answer all the q's in interview and get through it even in my first interview itself. But after going there in the same team i was in, my H's friends friend wife say her name as 'X' was also working and my H's friend asked his friend to tell his wife (X) to help me if needed. I learned the work by going taking courses but really i feel like i lack some basics after going to the job. I think my H might have told me when i went to job as we go to the job with fake experience.


    Here are issues i faced - in the first month, i dont know that i should submit timesheet for both my employer and the client am working for. I thought only we submit one timesheet, and my employer called me and asked me and i don't know how to submit the time sheet. I went to 'X' and asked her and other team mate 'Y' asked me if i didn't submit. I unknowingly to cover myself i told that i use to have only 1 time sheet in my previous company and thats why i didn't submit. It was blunder mistake to catch me. I was totally panic as i understood its a mistake. I got angry with my H as he didn't teach me all these basics and started fighting with him and this was my first fight apart from what ever i told about his nature.


    Every day i got to work these 2 ladies X and Y use to comment something about my dress or jewels saying oh..u ware this chain, we wont use such big chains to office, u r nicely wearning big jewels and i don't know i use to get very panic, but the lady X is my only option and i use to think that she is my H's frnds frnd wife and will help me, though i was very scared.


    They use to talk about cooking and even i like cooking so just when we get conevrsation, they asked me what all i cook and i just told them - they told me that they have some pot locks at times - i casually said ok next time tell me even i will join. for this they said if u make chicken or something these people (mgr and some lead) only like my(Y) cooking and they only eat what i cook. Really i was panic don't know what to talk


    I was put under a lady 'Z' in that company and she gave me some papers to read and she asked me to come to her if at all i have any questions. She came in b/n to my desk and saw me reading the papers. I was in 10th page reading something. She said - Oh u already went to 10th page. I just smiled and said yeah am just seeing. After sometime i got some doubt in 3rd page and went to her. She asked me hey u went to 10th page and now u got doubt in 3rd page? Really very very panic


    I just smiled and she answered my doubt and next day i told this to 'X' lady as my H suggested me to ask her. But the 'Y' also sits beside her and they both heard the way Z behaved with me. Y said why Z behaved so, u r so experienced as she is next time if she behaves so ask her on why she is talking so, this is not nice, she is really too much. Like this they just aroused me.


    Just after this conversation i went to Z just by an other way. Normally if i go in one direction this time i went in other direction where all SME's sit. I was just like want to walk around. When i went to Z, she asked me why i was coming in the other direction. I felt really stupid and as i remember X and Y saying me to ask her back, i stupidly asked her if there is only one way and if i should follow one way to come to her. I know she might have got full angry with me.




    Thats all donno with in a week or so i was fired suddenly on a day
    This is my first company.


    So later after my first company i attended few other interviews and i got selected in all of them. I will really answer well if i get an interview as i need not deal with people and their nature and wont be scared if they behave in other. Thats why all my interviews gets succeeded i think.


    Later i joined the second company and here i am working form around 3 years. I worked with different managers and leads all r indians but the clients r americans. The first project i was the only person onsite and team was offshore. It was very hard for me to handle offshore as they never use to listen what ever i say and i got conceived with my second baby with in one month of joining this. I face all the issues the same way and finally my H noticed that am getting so exhausted and want me to resign as this is not rt time to take stress. I went and asked mgr whats the process if i want to take leave.


    Thats all he moved me to other project with in a week and told me it will be better for me as there is team onsite itself. But later end of the year i noticed that my appraisal score came very low. They told me that there were so many escalations on me and that was the reason for low score. I asked them why i wasn't loop they just said as i am pregnant then they didnt tel me all these as i will get panic and its not good and thats why they moved me to different project.


    From then i have worked in 2 other projects and they went fine, but the lead will treat me very cheaply as if i know nothing or even if i say something they will be like they didn't understand what i said or they behave so mean to me. This is really haunting me. I came to know from others that the first project mgr spread something about me and thats the same impression passed on:(;:)(
     
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  2. Nand

    Nand Senior IL'ite

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    Really suffering alot in office - Let me describe a situation happened last week. i slipped a month ago and hurt badly i told this the same day to my manager and asked him if i can work from home the next day. He replied for what? That too with out looking at me and just staring the computer. This was really weird - i just smiled and said am unable to bear the pain and thats why. Then he asked what if we get any work in office which need to be done in office only like scanning and so on. I said if at all we get such work i will come to office. There is one more member in our team and so he can do this work and i need not stay in office for scanninf for something so, but he carelessly asks this kind of q's

    At times when ever i send a mail he will reply saying did u understand what the below was or he will say i didnt understand what u r saying and so on. I dont understand why he treats me so. It really hurts me alot with that behavior. As i am treated like this from my career beginning from past 3 yrs i am getting so panic and really suffering alot and at times i really do pretty simple mistakes and which make them treat me so cheaply again. But i get so panic. really i feel so bad and get frustrated.


    Last week i told him i am really unable to sit for whole day and am getting sever back pain by evening which is untolerable and also told him as we dont have much work these days can i work form home for half day in the afternoon which makes me better. For this he replied - even i have back pain. **** i felt so bad as if i want to knock my head to wall and dont know why he treats me so. I dont understand whata going wrong and why am facing such issues. :(;:):):):):)(:)(:)(


    Really feel bad every time, dont know how to handle these!! Getting headache every day and with all these pressure i come home every day
     
    Last edited: Mar 20, 2014
  3. Nand

    Nand Senior IL'ite

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    Please help me!!!
     
  4. gopituty

    gopituty Silver IL'ite

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    Change the job yaar.. Not all the managers/company are the same..
     
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  5. Nand

    Nand Senior IL'ite

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    I am having location constraint and am unable to find job in my locality of course am trying for that also, but I want to know how to tackle it currently.
     
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