Strange encounter. Need help to get out of this.

Ok. I get the point. I wanted to buy a farm, build a farmhouse so, that when I. Go back, I can live a retired life. It was mom, who insisted dont buy farmland. She brought in many of of dads friends to come talk to me, and suggested I don't invest in any farmland, instead buy sites, which will fetch me back high returns when I go back especially in Bangalore. But, I don't need returns, I need something which I can look back on for future. I still looked for farmlands. But, farmlands price have gone really very high in the recent days.
That's in between, my mom started putting this into my head. That everyone in my native place, insisted her on selling all our dads property telling her one of ur daughter is abroad, other might also go abroad(this was before my sisters marriage) so, sell all our dads property. From day one, I was for not to sell any of my dads property, because my dad was a very ambitious person, he had brought this piece of land on some foe against his relatives, who wanted my dad to leave his place for ever. They had written unnecessary petition against him, which my father proved wrong on many instances. Now, it was again the same person, who was playing tricks to get us sell the land. My sister never liked our native place. She has never been there in the last decade. It was me & my mom who used to attend relatives weddings, there. My sister also suggested sell everything, I don't like anything there, what is it for? Now, it was me who said, I & my sister until then had no property, so, I told them, we earn but we cannot have a piece of land. My sister considered investing in village is waste , her eye was investing in cities. So, better not to sell anything whichever my dad had. That's when my sister said, pl note it was she who said, she will never come there. My mom & my sister kept on telling that I have everything in village, my sis will have our house in Bangalore. I said ok. I did not count then nor today their values. Bangalore house value is more than 10 times of the total value of the agricultural land & this plot in my village. We have lived all thro our life in Bangalore. Bang. Seems very fast & busy to me. I like the serenity of the village. ESP after having lived abroad, one day in Bangalore traffic will make me go mad.
So, mom suggested building something, in that plot, will stop our relatives from asking the plots price for sale. So instead of building something , I said let me build dads dream. My dad wanted to build & rent it out for the only bank in my village. So, we approached the banks, gave letters, met the manager. If they accept the proposal, to build something for their proper use as per their requirements. In the start, they said they will soon get back. So, my mom kept on following it up. But, one day they got fed up & said, my mom, if we want we will only get back, don't bother us much. I was hurt, cos they talked rude to my mom. So, I decided not to follow them.
Our place does not have any party hall. So, I came up with the idea to build this party hall. With huge beams & columns end of the plot & none in the centre of the hall to make it look big in the small area. So, I got the sanction also for the project from the local authority. Till then or never did I ask my mom to invest. Once the project started, there was no building like this in my native, with that big beams & columns. Everyone envied it.
Now, who passed it on to the bank officials I don't know, not my mom. Once their regional manager visited our on going project. They got interested, & got back to my mom. My mom forgot how they treated her, but, I could not. She said she will speak to them & negotiate good price. Their offer was very low. She kept on telling she continue to negotiate. By then, she got some money which my father had invested, & proposed she will invest that on this. I said, when I fall short I will ask not until then. My project got slow, now, I had money balance in my acct, hence bought a flat for us on loan. now for the ongoing project i had no loan, so I was financially sound. Was expecting that returns from this project will go towards, my flat emi.

Also, kept in my mind, the money she said would invest would be enough to finish it. Now, the marriage started. We wanted that money. This money was reserved for my project, for my sisters wedding there was separate money. But, since she would be busy, I said to my contractor, wait till the wedding finishes, she will come & give you the money. In b/ w we called & told, not to give same this money ( she had already spent whatever I gave, so obviously don't give money meant, the money she had accepted to invest) now it was the finishing stages. After, wedding when I was about to start back, she said she got my jewellery released from that money, without my notice. Now, I had no more money & there I dint know that my mom had said yes to the bank people, for their small price Which I was not told & hence they started insisting to finish fast. I said I have no money now, neither she has, so, I said, I will finish it during my holidays by then which I would have made arrangements for money.
Now, all drama started, she wanted to give to the bank people,I wasn't. She said she will take money from my sis, & finish. I said no, don't take money from her. She said she will take loan from the same bank, again , I dint want double loan burden, I said no.
Behind me, she took loan in my sisters name & started the project without telling me. Her only point is to finish. I think this was what happened, when it started, it looked big, now, since it got held up, people were talking that we dint have money. I said its true, let them think so. Will soon arrange. Have already waited so long, since it was 3 more months for my holidays, it would be good for me to go & finish under my guidance. She did not want to wait for this 3 months cos the bank people insisted. That's when I had not yet asked her to transfer it to my name. She started telling its her husbands & hence hers,she can do whatever she want. That's when the legal notice idea came up. I contacted our family lawyer, he said he will talk. He said to her, the new generations idea is diff. From the old. She( means me) knows what she is doing. Let her only complete the project after she comes back. HOld until then. My intention was only to bring it to hold.

 

Looks very strange right. I have seen my friends mom treating my friends. When late they would feed them also from their hands.in kannada we call it kaituttu. I have never got a kaituttu from my mom. For many years I wanted to ask her, some 2 years back I asked her, why are you not like other mom's? Why can't I see that love for us in you? She said she had love, but she dint know to show it like what the others show. I dint ask her more. i knew that she never exhibited any little love towards us. i see my cousins sleeping on their moms lap. Believe it, I don't remember ever having slept on her lap. As a baby I would have, but not even as a growing up kid. My elder cousin brother who was 24 yrs old then, when I was at their place, remember sleeping on his moms lap, when she cleaned his ears, & my brother, used to take advantage to extract pocket money.she is my moms elder sister. She treated us like her kids. She used to ask me sleep on her lap. But, though I wished, I did not, some hindrance, since I never slept on anyone's lap. I was not responsible for this strange relationship. My mom never became our Amma. Even today whenever I hear. Songs on mom, like in kannada, Amma Amma Nina snehake sarisaati yaaru illa, ninaginta devarilla, ( translation: mother there is no friend like you, no one equal to you, no other god like you) my eyes would be pouring.

 

I gave only an example, whenever I saw moms around me, I have never found anyone as bland as my mom.