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An Affair and Its Aftermath - A Real Life Story

Discussion in 'Varalotti Rengasamy's Short & Serial Stories' started by varalotti, Jan 17, 2006.

  1. rvnachar

    rvnachar Silver IL'ite

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    The likes of Malathi's husband

    I have been witness to one womaniser, cheating on his very innocent and naive wife. The worst part was that the wife could not even read her husband's ill intentions and trusted him hundred percent, when he buttered her with all his words of concern and bought her flowers and small little gifts and sent her away to her mother's place for 'rest'. She could not even understand that he was having thorough physical fun with her own teenage sister right in front of her and took all that as his concern for her family members! How could someone be so foolish? He would often call her on our phone from the office and inform her that he had to stay back in the office due to 'heavy backlong of work' and she would express her worry about her 'overworking' husband!! He was conveniently working for an ad agency and would be spending the nights with one of the models. He would bring home models in the same auto-rickshaws in which he would see off his wife at the station!! My blood would boil. The wife never realised the truth of her husband's dramas till she was my neighbour. I don't know what happened later.


    Since my husband is a gem as far as his nature and character are concerned, I can never believe such stories. We trust each other so much that we can hardly think of such things. I could boldly sit in a public park with one of my men friends visiting Bangalore, to chat, because my house is very far away from the city and report about it to my husband. I asked him, "what if somebody came and told you that I was having fun with some man in the park?" My husband wittily replied, "What can I do? I will just grin and bear it" but from his face, I could say, he will be the last person to believe such nonsense. Such should be the strength of a relationship. I have friends, whose husbands cannot tolerate them going with their male friends on a two-wheeler or even just chatting with their male friends. If two people have to live with such suspicion under one roof, it is worse than hell.
    .
    If I were Malathi, I would not have accepted my husband back at any cost. I cannot tolerate betrayel by my husband. That is not a sin that can be pardoned. Neither would I betray my husband. It is not the question of physical intimacy. Once I realise he loves somebody else more than me, that is the end of the relationship. Loving somebody before marriage and getting married to a different person later is okay, because love always does not end in marriage for various reasons. That can be pardoned. But once two persons have entered into the holy pact of marriage, the two of them are supposed to be sincere to the relationship and honest to each other. Otherwise, why enter the institution of marriage at all?

    Sudha Narasimhachar
     
  2. Nandshyam

    Nandshyam IL Hall of Fame

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    Hmmm..

    I think Malathi made a mistake.. Will she have the same trust she had before finding out her husbands betrayal??? I dont think so, she shouldnt have accepted him at all.

    Nand
     
  3. nishajeet

    nishajeet New IL'ite

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    its a great job done by u malathi but i wont appreciate it on humanity bases becoz u have tampered the life of another women who is ur own sister.ofcourse she did mistake in some cicumstances where there is equal mistake frm ur husband to if u can accept ur husband y not ur sister.becoz u too have same luv and care before this incident.if ur also ignoring her then whats the difference between u and her.u have to atleast think abt her on humanity bases.thanku..



    take care
    nisha
     
  4. indiangirl

    indiangirl New IL'ite

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    Hi Everyone,
    After lot of thinking I wanted to ask suggestion from all of you. This is a long story and this is the first time I am writing so please ignore any mistakes. I am married for 71/2 years and we live in US. I have a kid who is 31/2 years old. Ours is a happy life until my friend entered my life. She came to do MS in US and as I was staying in near by city I used to help her a lot. She used to come for weekends etc and sometimes during holidays. Every thing was fine until I had my kid, after my kid is 1 year I noticed a change in both my husbands behavior and my friends behavior - they both smile at each other secretly, every day my husband will stay late(until 2-3) and work near her room, she started wearing indecent dresses, Suddenly she will give lecture on how its not bad to love some other soul mate even after marriage . Again I didn't know whether anything was going behind me for a long time. At that time my friend asked me if she can stay in my house for couple of months as she is having some financial problems with no job. Without knowing all these I agreed. I am working from the beginning. As soon as I noticed this change I met my husband at work and told him how I feel about his behavior change and told him I would give divorce and talk to my in laws regarding his relationship. He denied that he has any relationship with her and told me that everything is in my thinking and requested me not to inform these to my in laws. Just next day after talking to my husband that bitch decided to go to her place which I didn't stop. Then I got a better opportunity in some other place and moved there with my kid just to see how I can handle the kid alone, and in fact I did great. After that my husband got a job at my place and moved and he seem to have changed . After all these I sort of believed that there is nothing between them, but again they started meeting as she got job in the same city and as usual she wanted help and she would come late night with out any reason and I would ask her to stay(only once). Even that day my husband was working on computer near her bed when I woke up in the middle of night - my problem is I get very sound sleep I don't wake up for small sounds. From that day I stopped talking to her and she is not coming to my house. When I asked my husband what he was doing in her room, he was saying he remembered some work and was completing it. Let me tell you something he is not of a guy who works late in all other days he will sleep whole nights only when she is there he would have work. Also we have laptop too so he can work in our room even if needed. Again he denies it and says its just in my mind and its just imagination. I am not convinced by this answer please advice me if I am concerned un neccessarly. I did not mention this to my parents,in laws or her parents so far as I don't have proof and even they may say that its just imagination. I didn't talk to that bitch after that as I am really hurt badly to see this from a close friend. I am all depressed and am thinking all the time about this. Why it happened to me and whats the way out. My husband is very good in taking care of kid and all other things. I just needed to bounce this with someone else so thought of checking here. Thanks for all the advice.

    thanks
     
  5. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    I wrote the Story, Indian Girl!

    Dear Indian Girl,

    Very sad to know about your story. It does happen at times. Given some kind of opportunity people always tend to stray out of the path of righteousness, truth and fidelity.

    I am not that competent to pass a judgment on your husband or your friend just from reading your words. But I am afraid that something is seriously wrong.

    I would suggest that you approach a known, trusted marriage or family counsellor and seek his or her guidance.

    I would just offer my views on this. If the whole thing is just an aberration which occurred in the past and doe not continue now, you may decide to pardon your husband and look into the future, but be more careful in the future. But if the relationship continues, then it will be better that you take some serious decisions on the continuance of your marriage.

    Other than praying to God that you may blessed with the wisdom to assess the situation rightly and take a correct decision and the strength to carry out your decision, I am helpless in this matter.

    Please seek the advice of some family elders in this matter. Above all pray to Him fervently. Human being may let you down, but not God. He will definitely help.
    With Best Wishes,
    sridhar
    Varalotti
     
  6. indiangirl

    indiangirl New IL'ite

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    Thanks a lot for your advice Sridhar! I will try to consult family counseler and see where it goes. My problem is even though its from past I am so disturbed that I think of this all the time and as I do not have excat proof I am not able to take the step of divorce. In all matters I can take care of the kid alone as I am financially independent. My husband denies it and argues forever that this is just my imagination and he doesn't have any relationship with her.

    thanks again for your advice
     
  7. Pree

    Pree New IL'ite

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    Please help

    I am going to use this therad to seek help for a very close cousin of mine. She4 is married has two kids and is working where she travels abroad once a year. There is nothing wrong as such in her marriage - her husband is in business that i not exactly rocking but since her income is really good they have nothing lacking. She had taken up working only for the past 3 years when the going was really tough.

    Anyway while during the first onsite trip, while hubby was sometimes on a high horse, it was all put down to financial pressure as wella s the fact that he was missing his wife!!! But let me tell you that it had been too much of a shouting march.

    But this second trip early last year was terrible..seems since she went with male collegues there was a lot of suspicion in the air and the talks itseld were too demanding - upset quarrels if she was not online at a particular time, not taking into account that she is ebtitled to looka round the place on weekends but demanding that she must have been available to chat online..this inspite of knowing the heavy work schedule and her repeated pleas to make him understand the matter.

    Fortunately or unfortunately, one collegue onsite seemed to be a good frend and was always there to offer a helping hand. I think they could have exchanged may be a couple of hugs(from what she says), but they are good friends now and she sees himas a very stable friend.

    The hubby was suspicious of this as well..and this led to a series of fights that even I know of..she was seriously contemplating going back to her parents..

    But they have some how setteled their differences, but she says the old easiness id lost and she is always looking over her shoulder for the next fight..

    Tell me is it not the husband who drove her to another man due to his stupid talks..and even if she ahd an"affair" or not, how can it be her fault..I may be biasedtowards my cousin..but expect an honest feedback. Thanks
     
  8. Kamla

    Kamla IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Pree...

    Happen to read your post about your cousin today.
    What has happened to her marriage is unfortunate. What started as their financial problem has now become their marital discord. It is too late now for us to keep asking who was at fault. You mention that they have two kids. With that, their priorities are clear. They owe it to their kids to work around their differences and make their marriage work. This is something that your cousin and her husband have to do themselves. If they are adult enough to bring two kids into the world, then they should also compromise on individual egos and fall outs for the sake of the little ones. No use going back and trying to figure out who was at fault. How can that help? The situation is not a happy one, but now they must strive to see that it does not get even worse.
    Best of luck to them.

    L, Kamla
     
  9. Manjureddy

    Manjureddy Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Preeti
    Very unfortunate for yr. cousin. But suspicion is an inborn thing and cannot be cured easily. It takes a long time , winning trust, repeated reassurance, patience etc. This reads like a prescription for a doormat, I know . But, If the lady is upto managing her own life, she can call it quits. Its really her personal viewpoint thats important in the final analysis. Let us just hope that man loosens up a bit, work out his stress and person demons in a more constructive way and start sharing a happier life with the wife. All the best to them.

    Maybe a Course of Art Of Living can help both.

    Manjula
     
  10. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Sridhar,


    Superb.this would make a great movie script, unsual and gripping.Malathi comes across as a great character.True story of whom ? Would be interesting to know.You sure carry a lot of secrets in yr brains Sri.


    Damn good.Just loved it.Regards.kamal
     

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