Adopted parents dilemma

Dear Sri Ojaantrik,

Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I have written to VJBunny, moderator of this section in IL and hopefully she would be able to fix it. I apologize for the inconvenience caused to you.

Viswa

 

Dear VJ,

Thank you. There are a few more in sticky threads that have the same issues. Unfortunately, I noticed it after I sent a note to you. Can you kindly help fixing all of them? Thank you.

Viswa

 

Dear Lifeisgreat,

Thank you for your kind comment. I look forward to your comments on other posts as well. Thank you.

Viswa

 

Dear Namrata,

Psychologists always suggest that there is need to tell the child as early as possible. But it is my opinion that the timing is irrelevant but definitely the adoptive parents need to tell the child about the adoption. It is a question of making the child aware of the adoption when he or she is capable of handling and understanding it. I have not doubts in my mind that the parents need to tell the child but about the question of when should be decided by the parents.

Let us assume that the adoptive parents decide not to tell the child about adoption. Later, he or she comes to know through other sources, what do you think would be the reaction of the child? The confidence he or she built in parents will collapse dramatically. Can we get them married without telling about the adoption to the prospective bride or groom? In my opinion, not telling the child is not an option. I might be wrong and I am willing to listen other points of view, if you can explain to me why you feel strong about not telling the child.

Isn't it easier to tell the truth and handle the emotional impact for a few days, weeks or months rather than hiding it completely from the child? Can we really manage that information to remain confidential for the entire life?

Viswa