what others perceive of the difference in looks between couples ?

kiranmadhu · May 25, 2011

I am an average looking woman. My husband is very good looking. We have been married for quite a few years.
When I make acquaintance with people i come across and when they meet my husband, many have asked me if ours was a love marriage. One of my friends even asked me how i managed to get him.
I am sure our marriage happened because it was an arranged marriage. My husband would not have fallen in love with me and married me. He likes women who are good looking and modern. I am not like that.
I am surprised when some women ask me if it was a love marriage. Do they mean to say 'love is blind' and my husband should have been blinded by love to marry me ?
I want to hear of perspectives from other woman. Can people share what they think would be the reason for such a question from other women ?

Spiderman1 · May 25, 2011

It doesnt matter what others think. It matters what we think.

sreemanavaneeth · May 25, 2011

Hi Kiran,

[JUSTIFY]
Let other ask question. Your husband likes you . After seeing you in person only he agreed for the marriage. It means your husband is supportive and like your beauty. If anyone ask if your's is a love marriage say NO and be away from that place. We cannot scan other mind because we are not GOD. Your inner beauty and your physique will bring more charm to your life. Hence my sincere advise to you my dear friend
NOT to worry for other comments.

All the best.:thumbsup
[/JUSTIFY]

kiranmadhu · May 25, 2011

thanks sree. we love each other. but of course, there are ups and downs, fights and making-up. he likes to look at women and that surely hurts me because i feel he wouldn't be looking so much if i were as good looking as those women. i also hate it when people talk as if i am so damn lucky for having got this man.

psd1955 · May 25, 2011

Often, vibes matter a lot more than external considerations.

Prad

blessed · May 25, 2011

Don't worry if he looks at other good looking women, It does not mean that just because u are average looking he looks at others, as humans we admire at good things, won't we give a second look at men if they are handsome, we are just admiring them so what's wrong in it?

I think this complex makes you think like that, did he by any chance tell u about other good looking women or did he give u any negative comments, if no... then just be sportive... and take things as they come

Soumedh · May 25, 2011

Hi,
Its curiosity !!nothing else which make people always ask questions on other's life.
You just love yourself..and be happy.
Rgds

kiranmadhu · May 25, 2011

blessed, he never tells me i am not good looking. but i have noticed over these years, when he speaks good or praises a woman for some abilities they have, i have noticed them to be good looking. it is just that he notices the good qualities in good looking women. no he doesn't talk about their looks, but other qualities in them and it's clear that he admires them.
All of us have our merits and talents. but good looks make them to be noticed by others :coffee
but what is it that makes many of them think that ours is a love marriage. they ask that question with surprise too..that's what makes me wonder.

kiranmadhu · May 25, 2011

soumedh, i loved your response. yes, i will love myself.

justanothergirl · May 25, 2011

KiranMadhu
While I do not like their questioning ..the reason is pretty simple, In an AM set up...given the standard 15/30 min of interaction between the boy and the girl..there are few things u can base ur judgement on...main one being looks/status.
Love between a couple however takes months or years to happen
(Ok I am not talking infatuation here..) and while the initial attraction could be based on looks usually its other personality traits and compatibility that draws the couple together.