Why Are People So Ungrateful? Am I Overreacting?

Just going the by gist of what you have described, it seems not nice of her to go the event or baking class and not tell you. If you don't care for these kind of friends, you can slowly cut off contact.

Or it could be viewed in a different way.

You seem to have met only twice in person. For such a nascent friendship, the unsaid rules of "you didn't tell me" apply more loosely. The Indian event, she said she will let you know if she is coming, but didn't tell you after registering -- there could be many reasons. Maybe she ended up going with another group of friends. She might have discussed the event with many friends, and ended going with one.

Baking classes -- You are taking it way too personally. As if you unearthed some less known much coveted baking class information, and did her a favor by mentioning it to her. She took the info-sharing more casually.

And, the call she didn't take, texted you "busy will call later." She did call back. When such call backs happen, usually the conversation is continued without too much dissection of why the person did not take the call earlier. Your "Sorry.. disturbed you, seems you were busy.." puts the other person in a tough spot of having to come up with a plausible reason for not taking the call.

Between the time you told her about the classes and she started going, much could have happened. For all we know, maybe she got a call from the baking class that they have one spot open and she needs to decide right away. Just saying.

She is not ungrateful. It is just that her way of responding back is different than yours. Or maybe she likes to go to such classes or events alone.

If you have enough friends and not really looking for new ones, then, shrug and move on. If you would like to make more friends, then, accept that not all are as responsive as you are. You could do a test by signing up for the next thing yourself, and casually telling her later.

I used to think like you do now and did get hurt often, till I learnt to take it a little easy, and realized that new/casual friends will be different than close friends. For that matter, even among close friends, I get annoyed. I have a friend/ex-colleague whom I meet once in 2-4 months for a 45min-1 hr weekday lunch. I drive 35 mins and we meet 10 mins from her work place. She often wants to confirm only at 12 pm for our 12:30 pm lunch. Off late I have started to tell her straight that I need to know by 10 am where my next meal is coming from. She doesn't understand.

Another one -- a very old friend. I am in her area once in 2-3 months on Saturday or Sunday, a drive of 1.5 hours for me. I'll ping her on Thursday and say, "Hey how about coffee around 4 pm Saturday?" She will not say yes and won't say no. It will be something like, "Oh.. why don't you text me when you are done with lunch, let's see.." I respond, "would 5 pm work better for you?" She doesn't like to commit an approx. time. Likes to keep it impromptu. I like to know approx. time of afternoon coffee at least by the morning. So, it is just a difference in temperament. Or maybe she is single and they more 'take the day as it comes.'

Funnily, when DH fixes up coffee with any of his guy-friends, their entire conversation in the phone text is about 15 words. : )
Coffee Saturday morning?
Yes. 10 am?
10:30?
Ok. 10:30. Starbucks on Carson?
K. See you 10:30.


(smiley is mine, not in their text. : ) )