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Mental Health Of Parents With Special Needs Kids

Discussion in 'Healthy Living' started by Laks09, Nov 5, 2019.

  1. EightKittens

    EightKittens Silver IL'ite

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    @Laks09: I read the two articles you posted, and what stood out for me was the incident where the child had a melt down in a store and people thought that the mother was unable to control the child and were rude to them. And while you are not the author, I was wondering if you had any ideas or suggestions to share about how people who are not parents, or do not have exposure to autism could be more aware of it and supportive? Not that I'd ever comment on anyone's parenting in public, but I'd like to be more supportive, or at least less judgmental mentally the next time if I see someone struggling, if possible.

    Oh and I don't want to sound patronizing, but you sound like a very strong woman and lovely parent! I hope I get to interact with you a lot more around here.
     
  2. Caughtinbetween

    Caughtinbetween Gold IL'ite

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    Laks09 likes this.
  3. Mehana

    Mehana Platinum IL'ite

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    Each kid is different in this spectrum. Until you know about the kid's specific diagnosis, behavior issue and other things it's not easy to help that particular kid as a public.

    But I am so happy to see people like you atleast they try to understand and wanted to help the parent who need help when they couldn't do anything in public. To be honest parents with special need kids really need help but most of the parents don't ask for help.

    1. You can approach the parent in nice way and ask ' I understand what you going through can I help you anyway ....please don't hesitate to ask'

    2. If you doesn't know whether you can help them or not....just walk away instead of starring at that kid and parents

    3. If you know any good family (Friends or relatives)...with special needs children. Please always ask them if you need any help in watching your kid incase emergency please let me know. Just get better knowledge of the kid on how you could work on his behaviors or other things when his or her parents away

    4. If you see parents with special needs anywhere (known family) always talk to them in nice way ...topic shouldn't be about kids just talk something different ...

    5. If possible give the family any special gifts or food if you cook on specific festival time . .. sometimes parents need mental health support

    Still more to mention..but have to get ready my elder kid for school ..:)
     
  4. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Thank you Manisha.

    Thanks Anusha!
     
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  5. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Ashwini - I don’t recall our messages but I hope you are doing well. Thank you for the message. You can always get in touch whenever you want and I’ll help in whatever capacity possible.
     
  6. peartree

    peartree Platinum IL'ite

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    @Laks09 having been a member of this forum for as long as I have, there are a few members I look up to for the golden nuggets their posts are and you are definitely one of them. You are one of the kindest, most level-headed and nicest people on this forum.

    You are so inspiring, be it with handling your son, advice on how to support a high-schooler, keeping fit and finding the time for it with all that's going on with you, you are a super-woman, no doubt.

    Heartfelt thanks for sharing your valuable time and experiences with us.
     
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  7. viki123

    viki123 Silver IL'ite

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    @Laks09

    I was teary eyed by the end of your post. I can really feel how proud you might have felt seeing you son doing those.
    I have been through this, my DS was kept on spectrum with non categorical Autism and is getting therapy form school.

    I agree with most of the point you have mentioned where acceptance and having both parents in the same page helps.
     
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  8. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    Laks .such an inspiring fantastic post. Brought back my memories and emotions as well.
    Nothing more to add as a fellow special needs mom.
    Prayers for your loving family. IMG-20191106-WA0002.jpg
     
  9. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    @EightKittens - Thank you for trying to do the right thing. I think special needs or not, when kids are having a hard time in a store, the parent accompanying the kid does feel flustered and maybe a little embarrassed. I only expect non judgement.

    There was a time when someone walked up to me and told me how good I’m doing and handling this situation. It was an older woman and just her saying that helped me. She offered to help with my shopping cart and I gratefully agreed because I needed both my hands to carry my kicking/screaming kid out of the store.

    Those days are long past, thanks to the therapists who trained me to work with him but back then, I was ultra sensitive.

    Thank you! It’s helping me to read this virtually. It really helps me when my friends and family reinforce the right things I’m doing because in my mind I’m questioning myself and second guessing myself all the time.
     
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  10. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Thank you for your kind words peartree. I’m not sure the super woman mojo fits me anymore. I’m in the throes of early perimenopause, apparently because of my stress levels, and I haven’t run in a million months! I had gone back to consistently working out this year but I started working and stopped working out. I can never multitask. It’s either or for me. I really admire others who can pull it all off.
     
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