Festivals Becoming Stressors Not Celebrations!

Take the festival positively and don't do it as a chore and don't do all at a time. Eg : if you have to prepare sweets for Diwali don't do the cleaning task. Do one. If you have to do the cleaning then skip the making sweets part and buy from outside .
If your MIL or someone questions you tell them u can do one work as doing Everything is tiring you!
That should make her pitch in and help you with making the sweets ?
Unless you tell people around you(that means even people in your house) that you "cannot" do it they'll never understand that doing everything all alone is very difficult .
So tell them clearly and don't let them take you for granted.
A festival is an opportunity to bring everyone together at home. So everyone's involvement in pre festival tasks is as important as celebrating the festival. If they cannot pitch in simply don't do it all by yourself and stress yourself.

 

Firstly, one need not be a superwoman
This term is coined by someone and now the pressure and expectations is sky level !! Totally uneccessary and not needed.

I think in your case,since your in-laws are living with you..either they expect you to do the festivities prim and proper or you are scared and try to do it as perfect as possible.

Either way,there is absolutely no mistake from your side.Remember this.

Can you talk to your husband regarding this?Tell him that it is not right that you are expected to do everything with sans help.Either he or your in-laws need to help,else cut short the amount of sweets and savouries you make and take things easy.

Do whatever is in your capacity and pray heart felt.Prayers will be heard.

 

Hi,

Planning and delegation is key. Try to divide the tasks for each day for one/ two weeks before the festival. Doing everything one or two days before is extremely tiring and yes the spirit of festival itself will be lost.

Once you have the tasks planned, delegate some to family Eg- hubby has to clean wash room on Saturday. This way they won't feel loaded and can spend few hours helping out over the week.
Good luck & happy Diwali!

 

If done with passion and you learn to like the process, its not a chore. If done with some compulsion, and for sake of others, it is a chore.
Mindset. Whether you consider it a choice to choose it as mindset is upto you.
(since you said others ain’t gonna help, thats why the Mindset is critical here)

 

Hire outside help . Once family comes to know you are paying someone they will start pitching in .

 

Bubbles
Get snacks and sweets from local caterers
Get paid help for cleaning
Only if you are interested do the simple pooja else do initial prep and involve elders to do pooja. If that doesn’t work out lit deep and take everyone to temple and participate in pooja there. No harm done. You can get good food at the temple too. So relax. Nothing is more important than your health/ wellbeing

 

Moot point: what are we actually celebrating in a festival.

 

Why can’t the in-laws and husband have the same passion to help the DIL? Why should only the DIL change her mindset when living in joint setup. It’s everyone’s duty to work until and unless they aren’t fit and unhealthy.