Relationship Hijack And Banter

@joylokhi ....the posts are in response to saving marriage where in laws hate the spouse.
I have even tried to keep it neutral and written parents/ inlaws.

I feel we Indian parents overhype our relationship with our children believing it to be the most important .
Just because we think ,it doesn't become the most important .

It has its place in the lives of our children...among other things and people.

We should get over ourselves a bit and take things easy and let the children take things easy.

It is this need of most people to be most important in the grown children's life that is the cause of most issues in Indian families.

If only parents learn to take a back seat once children grow up and get into serious relationship or get married, so many issues will get sorted....and so many parents will save themselves the heart breaks when their children choose to put their own children (which includes the spouse as a family unit) ahead of the parents .

So much unnecessary head aches and heartbreaks because we the older generation do not want to take a back step with grace.

 

Agree with all three points above. We should also understand and be prepared for a future where we are no longer the most important people in our kids lives. We need to figure out , invest and start thinking of how we will spend our lives when we are older, rather than be the third/fifth/seventh wheel in the families of ours sons and daughters.

 

@yellowmango and @joylokhi I sort of agree with both of you. The older generation needs to take a back seat, stop investing too much time and money on their adult children and plan well to live independently once older. At the same time, I find it hard to believe that parents will wish bad for their precious child’s spouse, because it affects their own child ultimately. The intention is to get the DIL change her ways and fit into their idea of a ideal DIL ( which is wrong btw), but I don’t think they wish ill for the DIL.

 

The thread was about couples where in laws hate the dil.
I am not even making this about the inlaws/ vs dil and keeping it neutral because I have also seen an example where the mil hates her son in law .


Most inlaws may not wish ill for dil but there are those kind too.After all we are the country of bride burnings too.
What happens when the dil can't be bent and changed according to their wishes?
Then comes the hate and with hate often ill wish.
Haven't we seen enough on the forum when the in laws want to break the marriage....sometimes even when children are involved and specially when the child is a female?
So a blanket statement that they have no ill wish is probably not right. There are all kinds.....just like there are some dils and son in laws who are waiting for the older ones to leave this earth.

 

This probably hurt the person more than the prank. That some people will play a prank atvthe expense of others and put it out there for others to see just for a few likes and views.

Hope the idiots get taken to the cleaners.
Badnaami mein bhi to naam hoga !
Enjoy the ' views' pranksters !

 

Shortest for chinta nakko is prolly
Kavalai Padaathe.
the one I wrote is plural (for two people, so plural)

 

I feel once parents let children move to foreign lands to persue education and job ...they should also give them the option of choosing their own partner in that land without any guilt.