1. Want to be a Positive Parent? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

10 Std Not Interested In Studies

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by Soch, Jul 19, 2019.

  1. Thoughtful

    Thoughtful Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    624
    Likes Received:
    679
    Trophy Points:
    190
    Gender:
    Male
    The education system creates only book worms, so, don't fret over it if she is not adhering to what the school expects. Make sure not to micro-manage her and kill her confidence.

    Encourage her in areas which she is passionate about. When you move towards her interests, she will move towards yours.
     
    SunPa, Soch and Amica like this.
  2. Emarald

    Emarald Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    234
    Likes Received:
    180
    Trophy Points:
    93
    Gender:
    Female
    She might have distraction problem or she might not be getting good enough sleep at night. Distraction is very common problem. Lot of kids have ADHD. Focus on her sleep pattern, organic food, getting her good exercise and fresh air.
     
    Soch likes this.
  3. Amica

    Amica IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    3,037
    Likes Received:
    8,379
    Trophy Points:
    460
    Gender:
    Female
    Watching you yawn while she studies can't be encouraging for her.

    Why waste your time sitting idly with her? Sign up for a course yourself. When she sees you studying, she may feel motivated, too.
     
    Last edited: Jul 22, 2019
    Afresh, SunPa, Soch and 1 other person like this.
  4. Soch

    Soch Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    416
    Likes Received:
    201
    Trophy Points:
    93
    Gender:
    Female
    Problem is, if do my work, she will be sitting idle. It like i have to make her read question and explain and make her repeat. If I ask her read and i do my work. She will not complete single question even after 1 hour. From yesterday, i only sit and hold the book and asks her to read and memorise or make her repeat. I dont know whether this right or wrong but she was also happy and i was satisfied so that she could complete more questions. Now I have made up my mind that this is only solution for current situation.

    I should have energy to continue this.
     
  5. Afresh

    Afresh Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    526
    Likes Received:
    901
    Trophy Points:
    188
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi Soch!
    I can identify with the tiredness, it's us in this age of pollution and stage of life (with all the thyroid, vitamin d etc etc issues)!
    You do wake up really early so you need to rest to get your sleep.
    A small nap in the evening (10-20 mins) when you really can't keep eyes open helps to recharge a bit;
    If i were you, i would try to ensure a tutor and timings to match the child's study time;
    It's tough being a working parent but we need to think to work out around the constraints in the best interest of the child; Maybe she can rest in the afternoon, but a tutor can be engaged i n the evening when you are back at home.
    Consistent follow up of the timing of studies or syllabus;
    I couldn't open your referenced thread so a bit confused as to whether your daughter is ten years old or in tenth standard; older child will require freer hand but vigilant supervision
    Also, hope she's getting her play/unstructured time a bit so that the studies don't weigh her down completely by the end of the day
    Best wishes
     
    Soch likes this.
  6. Soch

    Soch Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    416
    Likes Received:
    201
    Trophy Points:
    93
    Gender:
    Female
    She gets her free time in the morning 1/2 hr and evening or night an hour. she listens to music in morning evening watch movies or play video games its her choice. I feel her problem is no friends in the area. I forced her to go and make friends but she is not doing it. I dont know the reason for it, she prefers elders to chat.

    If talk about her and tells her to find, it again forcing kind. So I left it.

    Tutor is what I am unable to find it. also now i dont want to take risk, if the tutor doesnt suits her. May be for her 11 and 12 std I fill find one.

    Thanks you very much for the suggestions.
     
  7. sokanasanah

    sokanasanah IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    3,959
    Likes Received:
    6,857
    Trophy Points:
    408
    Gender:
    Male
    That is very little free time! Why? A long commute to school? :yikes:
    Why not? What about kids in the neighborhood? What about her classmates? Do you live far away from school?
    There's nothing wrong with being comfortable with adults - in fact, it may be a positive quality - but the exclusion of friends her age is curious. You (and her Dad!) need to get better at figuring this out. Are her peers/classmates unkind? Is she afraid or self-conscious about something?
    You cannot compel her to make friends. That's not how friendships work. You have to find activities she might enjoy that involve other kids her age.
    You cannot give up so easily. Teaching children to socialize is an important part of parenting. You have to continue to investigate options discreetly. You are the adult. She is too young to make informed choices. You have to gently arrange opportunities for her to explore without being overly forceful or intrusive. Otherwise, it is often quite natural for a child to seek the path of least resistance.
    There are other ways to think about this:
    To encourage and draw out an unmotivated child, whether socially or academically, you need time. Children mature at different rates. Development is a process, not an event. She and her tutor, both, will need time to get comfortable with each other and to build a productive working relationship. You have to make allowance for that time. Your aims cannot be achieved at the last minute. You cannot dump a new tutor on her in the 12th standard and expect results in high-stakes examinations. You have to start early. Effort brings discipline; discipline enables practice; practice brings confidence, and from confidence springs achievement. None of this can happen overnight. It may take time to experiment with tutors and schedules to find something that works for her. You have to start early and nurture that evolution - the sooner, the better.

    Good Luck! :beer-toast1:
     
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2019
    Afresh, Anusha2917 and Soch like this.
  8. Soch

    Soch Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    416
    Likes Received:
    201
    Trophy Points:
    93
    Gender:
    Female
    We moved from Bangalore some 7 years back. She has lot of friends there, when ever we go to my brother house (My bro stays in the same house where we lived befor)she will be with friends only. She has a block that those are the only friends, here some kids are there of her. No one come out for play, she usually goes out to their house may be not much responding not sure though. Also all are busy with studies. We have Dog which she loves a lot, it because of her we got it. Her thinking will always be Dogs, and more of person she know in that society will be owing Dogs. I would say that in that society most of them knows her than me. Who ever talks to me would be because of her. In her Dance class she has 2 girls who became close off late. Only beacuse of that i am talking her that class as it is little far, but thought she is happy with them so taking her there. Also sometime i will take her to their houses.

    Regarding her timings, she gets up by 5.30, till 6.30, she will study. then get ready to school. We will leave to school by 8. she reaches home by 4.30. Till 6 she will be free, then 30 mins break by 8 again by 9.30 one more break till 10 pm. we will be sleep by 10.30 or 11.
     
  9. Afresh

    Afresh Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    526
    Likes Received:
    901
    Trophy Points:
    188
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi!
    Does the above mean that except for the 30 mins of 3 breaks, she's studying or that is the only structured activity in her schedule right from 5:30 in the morning?
     
  10. Soch

    Soch Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    416
    Likes Received:
    201
    Trophy Points:
    93
    Gender:
    Female
    I did not get you. Currently we follow this schedule or else she will be just keeping her books in hand and dreaming. Now that i ask questions in between she is studying. Based on this test results, will have to see how to proceed. Also if ask her immediately she replies if ask her next day she forgets. So Now i am asking her to read same questions every day and move to other questions.

    Can anyone tell me is there any options to make her remember what she studys for sometime.
     

Share This Page