Me Too?

Geeta Ji, I agree with you. The most that men can do right now is acknowledge the issue rather than slut shame. Some have not acknowledged ( amitabh Bachchan) , some have declared they are victims ( chetan Bhagat !).

 

@SinghManisha,

Thank you for bringing that up. We have a very high profile case here in the US which you may already be familiar with. A professor from Palo Alto University who also teaches Clinical Psychology in Standford gave a testimony in the Congress that a nominee to the Supreme Court sexually assaulted her (36 years ago) when she was 15 years old and he was 17 years old. He claimed that the nominee (now Supreme Court Justice) along with his friend were in an inebriated state pushed her into a bedroom, locked the door behind them and jumped on her and tried to remove her clothes. They increased the music volume so that her screams couldn't be heard by anyone. One of them closed her mouth so that she couldn't shout. Eventually, she escaped that sexual assault.

But her witness was thrown out because the two inebriated boys gave testimony that they don't remember anything like that happened in the year 1982. There were other friends seated in the first floor and didn't hear anything. As it happened 36 years ago, they couldn't recall such an incident. The victim didn't share it with anyone for a long period of time. The Senators including a few woman Senators threw her testimony stating that there are no corroboration witnesses. The nominee was hurriedly appointed as Supreme Court Justice within a few days.

Now, many Americans believe her testimony while other Americans consider her as a political ploy to destroy an illustrious career of a Judge.

 

At a work place there is only one grade of flirtation : creepy !

 

This case is a stark reminder of why women hesitate to open up about their assaults. The victim here had her entire life uprooted with the whole world watching. She has had to move homes often , family split up because of death threats. The perpetrator here gets appointed to the highest position in judiciary. So let’s not crucify women for not speaking up earlier.

 

Here is the thing about instincts, they can be tamed/modified. That is the very point about metoo, it is letting people know that it is not ok behavour. It isn't a joke , it is very offensive and dare I say traumatic to most women.

This!

Is flirting the only way men know how to connect to women colleagues? Yes, this would bring about a change in how men interact in the workplace, but guess what - Sometimes change is good.

Years ago when I started working, I remember working at an company where there was only one women's bathroom in entire campus and I had to go to another building 5 mins away while men had one at every floor. Today there is a women's restroom at every floor where I work. Do you think this transition was easy? There were no complaints about wasting company resources when this happened. But you know the men and the company survived even after making accommodations for their female colleagues

 

Almost 30 years ago, I still remember the poem, 'Ulysses' it was the lesson that day. There was this 30+guy teaching us, you know how we fight to sit in the aisle side of our long desks so we aren't squished both sides, one day, it was my turn, and I never sat there again. I didn't ask the other girls if they too were brushed over the shoulder..Then, a few years after, he was my house master and I remember the quarterly holidays praying for a miracle. We get back and I learn that he had a heart attack I thought it was because of my prayers and felt guilty..
My daughter wears a similar skirt to school, she's in the swim team, do you think I shouldn't think about it? If the guy is not dead, but teaching her instead, I should warn 'only' my daughter to be careful? Or call him 'out' and shame him so other mothers are atleast aware of the problem?? Or I will encourage and empower my child to file a case?

It IS painful, shameful, creepy whenever we THINK about it and we CANNOT not think about it just because we didn't fight him then..

 

We should first check with OP how long do you and your daughter have to report this issue.

 

Statute of limitations source:wiki
For indictable (serious) offences such as major theft, murder, kidnapping or sexual assault, a defendant may be charged at any future date; in some cases, warrants have remained outstanding for more than 20 years...
I got your sarcasm, but really upset..there's NO Statute of limitations..if there is, it shouldn't be ...

 

My sincere apologies, I did not mean to cause you pain. I was just frustrated with OP's repeated insistence that maintaining the status quo is more important than the pain caused by sexual harassment to women.

I am with you, there should be no statue of limitations.

Again, accept my sincerest apologies

 

I got your point the first time.. Thats why I mentioned I got your sarcasm.. So, no need to apologize.. I know even the OP is with us, only thing is he has to literally walk in our shoes to feel the pain..