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How Much Can Ladies Contribute To Household?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by shravs3, Jun 18, 2018.

  1. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    How much should a lady contribute to household expenses . Considering both are working and still no kids yet.

    I have seen some houses where only the man takes care of the all the finances even when wife is working .

    But she may not contribute much to house except for giving gifts to husband or trips etc.

    When both are working of course both should contribute in some ways depending on the salaries .

    But my question is should the wife bear the entire household expenses or should the wife give entire salary to husband without saving anything for herself ? Or just contribute some portion of it and remaining it will be as her savings.

    I agree that each household is different!

    Currently I am a housewife though. I may start working in few months .

    Recently my DH was like all these months I have taken care of the household expenses once you start earning you should only take care of everything . I felt a bit weird as he earns a good amount though .
    I am sure he wasn’t joking because many times he has told this .

    According to me when both are working both should contribute based on their earnings .

    When money comes any person can get hurt irrespective of relationship ,
    if the financial aspect is not taken care properly.

    Which is the best way in which wife can contribute but also do some savings for herself ?

    And recently I have even heard that after marriage some husbands want to be a joint holder of wife’s salary account but not vice versa. Some husbands don’t allow their wives to have control on their own Salary !

    And there are some women who contribute everything for their family and kids but she is left with nothing when she needs for herself !

    I am not so much interested in joint account esp with salary account . I also want to save some money for my future as well .How can I convince the same politely ?
     
    Last edited: Jun 18, 2018
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  2. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

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    This contribution depends on the level of planning n understanding you have.
    I know of wives who doesn't contribute to anything in household n keep the whole amount they make themselves.
    There are others who says 50-50 or by some percentage.
    N some who plans like 'this' expense you pay, 'that' expense I pay.

    In our case, mine goes to saving fully. N it's touched only on need basis. Both of us have no separate stash savings as such, financially we are 100% transparent, responsible (n irresponsible), we provide for the parents, take out the hefty school fee n money for our personal expenses from the same account, to name a few. Our work accounts are not joint, but the savings accounts are.

    The understanding of how you should plan financially should come with both the partner's mutual understanding. If there are insecurities about the marriage itself, then it's vital to keep good amount of savings separately. If it's not, then you can plan for future properly together.

    If your hubby is understanding, talk it out n come to a mutual understanding that works for the both of you.

    But if he's unreasonable n adamant,
    don't disclose the whole pay you get n only state the amount you want to spend.
    If that's not possible, show add on house expenses n save that.
    Or come up with a good reason like, saving money to buy a property or jewellery (jewellery shops have monthly saving schemes) or start some investments, where the money will go for it every month.
    Just come up with smarter options if this becomes challenging.
     
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  3. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    In your case you can decide on the amount you want to save and have it automatically taken out of your paycheck to the savings vehicle of your choice. Then you can use what's left to contribute to the household expenses. It's fine to pay for monthly expenses but ideally the income should be regarded as 'ours'.
     
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  4. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Platinum IL'ite

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    Ashneys explained beautifully.
    The categories are same as she drafted.
    You can go for 50-50 by every month. Sometimes it may not work, if one person brings groceries, pays bill.
    You can give specific amount every month as your contribution.
    And save the rest in savings so that it's untouched
     
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  5. HazelPup

    HazelPup Platinum IL'ite

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    +1
     
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  6. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    Did your husband contribute to housework while he was paying for household?

    What would be his reaction if you told him that you are working and taking care of household expenses ,he should now take care of household work?

    If he wants you to solely take care of house expenses..ask him what he is going to do with his salary?

    Give him the option..
    Both of you keep 20 % salary for personal use and expenses.For rest...

    1)You take care of expenses and his salary goes towards joint investments with both your names.
    Divide house work.

    2)He takes care of expenses and your salary goes towards joint investments with both your names.
    Divide house work.

    3)Both pay equally for expenses ,do equal house work and invest in joint names.

    4)Both pay a certain %age for household expenses, invest seperately in both your names,divide housework.

    Let him choose.
     
  7. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Not much he is contributing in household work .
    His mom is pressurising me to work not directly but telling her son indirectly repeatedly on calls as we stay in US.
    Infact she had told me before marriage that we won’t expect a pie from you you do whatever you want and now in calls daily she is enquiring me and my DH regarding my job and even telling him that I should search seriously ..
     
    Last edited: Jun 18, 2018
  8. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks Ashneys for detailed reply !
     
  9. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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  10. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    I don’t know why but the more she is stressing on my job the more I feel like going against her even if I want to work!:sob:
     

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