Presenting Self....

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by messedup, May 17, 2018.

  1. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    Hello All....

    Today I want to discuss and know about the skills to present yourself as a strong and positive person. I have seen many who are not good in anything that we can say extraordinary but still they manage to present themselves as very confident and mature. They don't bother about what others think about them and just always try to show off everything. They at least have the confidence to do so.

    I am no less than anyone but always show myself as weaker personality and other person no matter how wrong he/she is come over me with their skills. And I just show them that whatever they said is right and I know nothing. I cannot present my point confidently and cannot show how wrong they are. But every person can show the same to me.

    I find most of you here as very confident and positive. How you all developed this nature and what should be done if someone want to be like this?
     
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  2. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    @reca thanx for the like. But more than that I was expecting a reply.
     
  3. reca

    reca Silver IL'ite

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    Hello @messedup :
    1. You are not messedup ! you are a beautiful lady :)
    2. One good thing is, skill/being good at something is not a pre-requisite to be confident and positive....
    3. The category of people whom you are referring here are called 'Extroverts'. It is a personality trait.
    Human personality can be classified as extroverts and introverts. Extroverts are that way by their genes, the environment in which they are brought up, their exposure to different situations to name a few...
    4. Same applies to introverts. Introverts are bit shy in nature. It doesn't mean they know nothing. Here are some amazing people: Mahatma Gandhi,Albert Einstein,Bill Gates, Elon Musk, Marissa Mayer, Abraham Lincoln ...And they are all introverts, shy people. You can see the impact they have made on this world. It is their work that speaks. They never showed off.They stuck to who they are, followed their passion.
    5. We just need to treat others kindly and smile, that's all needed to be positive in my view. The more positive we become, meaning focusing on bright side of the things we can be happy and enjoy life :)
    6.Learning good things from others and improving knowledge will help us to talk with wide array of people.
    these are my 2 cents :)

    Dear Ladies, thank you for taking time to go through the above points. Please add in your views on the topic, share your thoughts ... :)
    Best Regards,
    R
     
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  4. Naari

    Naari Platinum IL'ite

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    1. Belief in own self actually conviction. And I don't mean pride or false ego, It's truly believing in your own abilities and goodness.
    2. Being positive and cheerful
    3. Smiling and staying balanced even in crises (this one is tough one)
    4. An open mind and ever learning attitude
    5. No self created mental blocks, fears or boundaries
     
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  5. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    Thank you @recca and @ naari for the reply.

    Point 5 mentioned by @Naari is there in me. My parents never trusted my abilities and my h wants to but I never got any exposure to the practicalities of life so every time he has to take the responsibility.
    Everyone who know me like me and praise me but I don't believe them much. But the one who show a little negative I believe and start losing my confidence in me. This is a personality trait or something else. How can I come out of this habit?
     
  6. reca

    reca Silver IL'ite

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    Hello,
    @messedup :
    How about taking a small step each day towards responsibilities ?
    Start by opening up slowly. While going out, you drive yourself / buy ticket .. you learn the process.
    Going to bank and know the process of operating your account.
    Go shopping on your own, it could be clothes/groceries.
    First you feel intimidated, but its ok. Give yourself time to get used to these stuff.
    Join a volunteering group which does the work you like .. ex: Visit to orphanage, Visit to animal welfare center, teaching basic stuff to school kids to name a few ... you can meet new people/ friends with interests similar to you..
    Best Regards,
    R
     
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  7. messedup

    messedup Platinum IL'ite

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    Thank you....yes what you said is right. Earlier my kids were small so I didn't had any option to go out that deteriorated my confidence to a big extent. But now they are little old and can manage for few hrs without me. I will definitely start exploring. Need to learn a lot of things. Thank you for understanding the exact problem and suggesting ways to come out.
     
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  8. reca

    reca Silver IL'ite

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    Hello @messedup : I found this video useful
    @darshitasai1996 .
    Darshitha was so kind to share this link in one of the posts of mine. It is an inspiring video. Lots to learn from this.
     
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  9. Star25

    Star25 Gold IL'ite

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    @messedup
    Mostly the way we are brought up and the situations and circumstances around us determine the way we are today.. If we need to change from that it will take long time since we have lived that way all these years. But if we have the mind to change a small step everyday can lead us to what we want to be in future. My opinion is if we feel we lack self confidence then we must do the things that boost our confidence by doing things we havent done so far or by doing something that we think we are not good at..so if succeed while doing any of the above our confidence level gets boosted up.. By repeatedly trying to boost our confidence our personality itself changes and we become a more confident person...At that point we will be bold enough to talk back if people around us pass negative comments or even to justify that we are right.. self confidence is a good feeling as such, that make anyone feel worthy of themselves.
     
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  10. GeetaKashyap

    GeetaKashyap IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear m,

    Little things make perfection but perfection in itself is not a small thing.

    All have their own imperfections and battles in life. When we believe our problem is the biggest, we get trapped and we cannot move forward. But...if we understand that most people face the same fears that we face and fight the same battles that we have, then acceptance of our strengths and weaknesses become easy.

    As others have already suggested set small targets and achieve them. Pat your own back for these small successes. Maintain a gratitude journal. It will make you aware of your own blessings or positive points. This awareness can strengthen your resolve to become a more confident person.

    Accept and be kind to yourself.
     
    Last edited: May 19, 2018

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